Autumn Wish by Stacey Joy Netzel Page B

the way to accomplish that.”
    “I’m sorry,” he repeated. “I just...I didn’t realize what it would do to me seeing you with someone else.”
    She lifted her chin a notch. “Hurts, doesn’t it?”
    His eyes darkened, and his hand fisted on the counter. “Seeing that guy kiss you drives me insane.”
    He really was jealous. The confirmation triggered an emotion she wasn’t quite sure how to define. Happiness? A little bit, because he still wanted her. But mostly satisfaction. She kind of felt bad, but knowing he now experienced some of what she’d gone through made her feel good, as well as if a little justice had been served.
    Remembering why she’d gone through all that pain tempered her joy. “You’ve got no one to blame but yourself, Joe. You left me, remember?”
    “I told you, I realize now that was a mistake.”
    “After you saw me with Sam.”
    She was surprised when he ran a hand through his hair and left it messed up.
    “What can I say? I’m an idiot. A jerk. I regret that I hurt you.”
    He moved forward and took both her hands in his. His touch awakened memories of the good times they’d had the year they were together. He was a good man, and she’d loved him with all her heart until he broke it into tiny little jagged pieces that stabbed her chest with each breath.
    Remnants of those shattered emotions stirred to life as his plaintive gaze held hers.
    “If there is any way you can forgive me, Nicole, I’m begging you to give me a second chance. To give us a second chance.”
    Wow. Joe Holder begging? She didn’t know what to say.
    Actually, yes , she did. She pulled free once more and crossed her arms over her chest. “Tanya know you’re here?”
    “I broke it off with her. We’d only gone on a few dates. It was nothing serious.”
    “Did you sleep with her?”
    Joe shifted back a half step, his averted gaze answering the question for him. Nikki turned her head to stare at the counter. Then she pushed past that stab of hurt and moved on to the main hurdles.
    “Have you changed your mind about getting married?”
    “I’m ready to talk about it.”
    That was a huge step up from him walking out on her at the mention of til death do us part. She brought her gaze back to his. “And kids? Are you ready to talk about a family, too?”
    His gaze faltered before locking steady again. “Down the road, yes.”
    He was offering the possibility of what she’d wanted all along. She respected his honesty in being willing to talk about the issues instead of promising her everything right away. But she also knew after spending just a few days with Sam and Ella, she would settle for nothing less than everything.
    She wasn’t willing to go down this road a second time with him if he was only going to break her heart again. Not after she’d just started to heal with her budding feelings for the man next door.
    Thinking of Sam added another level of uncertainty and confusion. Was he the attraction, or did she love the idea of Ella and him and an instant family?
    “What I want for my future hasn’t changed,” she warned Joe.
    “I know. And you deserve to have what you want and be happy.”
    “We both do. So if you’re not sure—”
    “Let me take you to dinner tomorrow night,” he suggested. “No pressure, just a nice night out to see how things go.”
    She warned him about being sure, yet here she stood, plagued by doubts. About him. About Sam. About herself.
    The thing was, she had no clue where things were going with Sam, if they were even going anywhere. He kissed her like he meant it for himself, yet the original idea had been to make Joe jealous. Which they’d done. He might figure his job was done, and then where would she be? She hadn’t known him long enough to bet on any type of a future with him and Ella, so didn’t she owe it to herself to see if there was still a chance of one with Joe?
    “Dinner sounds nice,” she agreed with caution.
    Hope filled Joe’s expression.