hoping she gets.
“What are you doing this weekend?” she asks, getting it. “Maybe you have some time?”
“I have all the time in the world…for you, Frances.” I’m sure I can hear her smile.
“That’s perfect. I’m driving up north for a family thing. It’s my mother’s seventieth birthday. Want to come?”
“For the weekend?”
“I’d love you to come. We can stay at my sister’s place. It’ll be fun. Might take you out of your funk. Oh, I’ve got a call coming through. Think about it and call me back.”
I don’t need to think about it: I’m in. Wait, she thinks I’m in a funk?
Again, Frances drives her very swish and comfortable Beemer while I sit in the passenger seat and enjoy the scenery as we drive north. She looks amazing. What’s even more amazing is that, in her casual jeans and t-shirt, she looks like she’s not even trying to look good, she just does. She has music playing that I don’t recognize except to describe it as happy music and not at all what I would listen to normally.
I find myself conscious of being too cheerful about everything she says and generally smiling too much. I’m not sure if I’m doing it because a) I’m happy, b) I’m trying to be happy or c) I’m trying to appear like I’m not in some sort of funk or depression.
I would never categorize myself as being a depressed person but I don’t know how I’m coming across to others and in truth, I’m really not sure if I am a glass half full or a glass half empty type of person. I like to think that I’m kind of a bit of both but maybe default to the glass half empty, maybe so as not to become too disappointed when people let me down (or when life, in general, doesn’t go my way, which seems to be a lot).
If you have high expectations of people and of life, I think that you really set yourself up for some major hurt and disappointment. I would think that the best course of action would be to hedge your bets a little and try to stay in or around the middle, cruising somewhere between exuberant and gloomy, perhaps.
“What do you look for in a relationship, Martin?” Frances asks, keeping her eyes on the road. Deep inside me I can hear a large groan and some part of me say, “Aw, shit, here we go…”
Is this every man’s experience or it just me? Why is it that I only seem to attract girlfriends that are obsessed with talking about relationship in general and the one we’re in, in particular?
Guys never talk about relationship, except to their male buddies and that’s only when the chick has fucked up or is giving him a hard time about something, usually about nothing. Most guys I know wouldn’t even dare answer their girlfriend’s questions about their relationship because invariably the woman that’s asking has something on her mind. Her asking questions is her way of bringing up whatever problem she has with the guy, so she can let him know what she thinks needs fixing: and as far as women are concerned, just like a house, in a relationship, there’s always something that needs fixing. And ten times out of ten, it’s the guy’s fault.
“You mean what kind of girl do I look for to be in relationship with?” I ask, knowing that that’s not at all what she’s asking.
“No, I mean what qualities in a relationship do you think are most important?”
“I would say honesty… loyalty and… integrity would be on the list. Why do you ask?”
“I think it’s important that two people should share a common philosophy in relationship, don’t you?
“Absolutely. Who are your favorite philosophers? Aristotle? Plato? I like Plato, he’s a personal favorite.” She laughs.
“I just mean that it’s important that we’re on the same page about things.”
“I agree,” I say and, hoping to put an end to this conversation, I purposefully look out the window, turning my head as if I just saw something of particular interest.
“Aren’t you curious to know what I think the most
“What are you doing this weekend?” she asks, getting it. “Maybe you have some time?”
“I have all the time in the world…for you, Frances.” I’m sure I can hear her smile.
“That’s perfect. I’m driving up north for a family thing. It’s my mother’s seventieth birthday. Want to come?”
“For the weekend?”
“I’d love you to come. We can stay at my sister’s place. It’ll be fun. Might take you out of your funk. Oh, I’ve got a call coming through. Think about it and call me back.”
I don’t need to think about it: I’m in. Wait, she thinks I’m in a funk?
Again, Frances drives her very swish and comfortable Beemer while I sit in the passenger seat and enjoy the scenery as we drive north. She looks amazing. What’s even more amazing is that, in her casual jeans and t-shirt, she looks like she’s not even trying to look good, she just does. She has music playing that I don’t recognize except to describe it as happy music and not at all what I would listen to normally.
I find myself conscious of being too cheerful about everything she says and generally smiling too much. I’m not sure if I’m doing it because a) I’m happy, b) I’m trying to be happy or c) I’m trying to appear like I’m not in some sort of funk or depression.
I would never categorize myself as being a depressed person but I don’t know how I’m coming across to others and in truth, I’m really not sure if I am a glass half full or a glass half empty type of person. I like to think that I’m kind of a bit of both but maybe default to the glass half empty, maybe so as not to become too disappointed when people let me down (or when life, in general, doesn’t go my way, which seems to be a lot).
If you have high expectations of people and of life, I think that you really set yourself up for some major hurt and disappointment. I would think that the best course of action would be to hedge your bets a little and try to stay in or around the middle, cruising somewhere between exuberant and gloomy, perhaps.
“What do you look for in a relationship, Martin?” Frances asks, keeping her eyes on the road. Deep inside me I can hear a large groan and some part of me say, “Aw, shit, here we go…”
Is this every man’s experience or it just me? Why is it that I only seem to attract girlfriends that are obsessed with talking about relationship in general and the one we’re in, in particular?
Guys never talk about relationship, except to their male buddies and that’s only when the chick has fucked up or is giving him a hard time about something, usually about nothing. Most guys I know wouldn’t even dare answer their girlfriend’s questions about their relationship because invariably the woman that’s asking has something on her mind. Her asking questions is her way of bringing up whatever problem she has with the guy, so she can let him know what she thinks needs fixing: and as far as women are concerned, just like a house, in a relationship, there’s always something that needs fixing. And ten times out of ten, it’s the guy’s fault.
“You mean what kind of girl do I look for to be in relationship with?” I ask, knowing that that’s not at all what she’s asking.
“No, I mean what qualities in a relationship do you think are most important?”
“I would say honesty… loyalty and… integrity would be on the list. Why do you ask?”
“I think it’s important that two people should share a common philosophy in relationship, don’t you?
“Absolutely. Who are your favorite philosophers? Aristotle? Plato? I like Plato, he’s a personal favorite.” She laughs.
“I just mean that it’s important that we’re on the same page about things.”
“I agree,” I say and, hoping to put an end to this conversation, I purposefully look out the window, turning my head as if I just saw something of particular interest.
“Aren’t you curious to know what I think the most
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