said, before I even thought about it. He followed me upstairs, and with each step, I was thinking, Lord, what am I getting myself into?
“Have a seat,” I said, once we were inside. I was so nervous that I turned on the TV instead of the stereo, which is what I had intended to do. Still, I didn’t want him to think I was trying to set a “mood.” If there was going to be one, then we’d have to create it ourselves.
He hadn’t sat down; I could feel him standing behind me. When I turned around, he was right in front of me. As if it was the only thing left to do, he bent down and kissed me on my nose, my cheeks, and then my lips. His mouth was warm and sweet. I thought maybe I should resist, but I couldn’t, and then, with his lips breaking me down second by second, I asked myself, Why? I guess when my palms pressed inside the small of his back, that was his cue to go ahead and wrap those long arms around me. And that did it. I could’ve screamed,
“Please don’t let me go!”
but I didn’t. I was already falling in the black hole. He smelled so good, felt so warm and solid, that I couldn’t help but think that
nothing
should feel this good. And he kissed me so slowly, so softly and deeply—the way I liked to be kissed—that my heart clicked. My eyelashes brushed his, and we rubbed noses, back and forth, back and forth, until I couldn’t stand it. I swear, I tried to back up a little—just to get hold of myself—but he wouldn’t let me go. Then it felt like I was floating away. Maybe because he had picked me up and was laying me down on the couch. I didn’t want to open my eyes, because I knew this shit only happened in the movies. “Do you know what you’re doing?” I asked, opening my eyes.
“I know exactly what I’m doing,” he said. And I guess he did. He eased my T-shirt over my head andunzipped my shorts and put his big hands on my waist and rubbed. I don’t know how he got my bra off, but I knew it was off when I felt him kiss my shoulder.
Then he stopped.
Here I was, aching all over, and he stopped!
“Can I just look at you?” he asked, and got up and leaned against the refrigerator. He crossed his arms and legs and smiled at me like I was a prize he’d won or something.
“You’re beautiful,” he said.
I smiled, because I felt beautiful. Then he moved a few inches away from the refrigerator, unzipped his jeans, and took off his shirt. He dropped everything on the floor, and just stood there. I wanted to put my hand over my mouth. I had never seen a man’s body so perfect. My eyes traveled from his head on down, then stopped. Lord have mercy.
“What do you plan on doing to me?” I asked, as he started coming toward me.
“Everything,” he said.
The man was no liar. He stroked my hair and my back, kissed my elbows, my belly, my thighs, even my knees and toes! I wanted to scream. To pull out every strand of his hair, my hair—somebody’s hair. Finally, I thought, a man who knew that breasts had feelings too. I touched him everywhere I could reach. Brushed my lips wherever I felt skin. His body was one tight muscle after another, and so hot, so big, so strong, I wanted to beg him to never stop touching me. “Lord, Lord, Lord, Lord, Lord,” I sang, as we moved like slow tornadoes. He was so considerate and smooth that by the time I heard him call out my name, I knew it was
me
he wanted.
“Franklin!”
I sighed, and my body let itself loose.
“I’m here, baby, I’m here,” he said, and kissed me on my shoulder. A river had formed in the cave ofmy belly, and I felt limp. He shivered. A moment passed, and he shivered again.
“You’re too good to be true,” he said, and lifted me up on top of him. He stared into my eyes as if he was searching for something, and after he found it we held each other like it was goodbye instead of hello. Finally, we both exhaled, and sank. We kept our arms and legs wrapped around each other like octopuses for what must have been a long
“Have a seat,” I said, once we were inside. I was so nervous that I turned on the TV instead of the stereo, which is what I had intended to do. Still, I didn’t want him to think I was trying to set a “mood.” If there was going to be one, then we’d have to create it ourselves.
He hadn’t sat down; I could feel him standing behind me. When I turned around, he was right in front of me. As if it was the only thing left to do, he bent down and kissed me on my nose, my cheeks, and then my lips. His mouth was warm and sweet. I thought maybe I should resist, but I couldn’t, and then, with his lips breaking me down second by second, I asked myself, Why? I guess when my palms pressed inside the small of his back, that was his cue to go ahead and wrap those long arms around me. And that did it. I could’ve screamed,
“Please don’t let me go!”
but I didn’t. I was already falling in the black hole. He smelled so good, felt so warm and solid, that I couldn’t help but think that
nothing
should feel this good. And he kissed me so slowly, so softly and deeply—the way I liked to be kissed—that my heart clicked. My eyelashes brushed his, and we rubbed noses, back and forth, back and forth, until I couldn’t stand it. I swear, I tried to back up a little—just to get hold of myself—but he wouldn’t let me go. Then it felt like I was floating away. Maybe because he had picked me up and was laying me down on the couch. I didn’t want to open my eyes, because I knew this shit only happened in the movies. “Do you know what you’re doing?” I asked, opening my eyes.
“I know exactly what I’m doing,” he said. And I guess he did. He eased my T-shirt over my head andunzipped my shorts and put his big hands on my waist and rubbed. I don’t know how he got my bra off, but I knew it was off when I felt him kiss my shoulder.
Then he stopped.
Here I was, aching all over, and he stopped!
“Can I just look at you?” he asked, and got up and leaned against the refrigerator. He crossed his arms and legs and smiled at me like I was a prize he’d won or something.
“You’re beautiful,” he said.
I smiled, because I felt beautiful. Then he moved a few inches away from the refrigerator, unzipped his jeans, and took off his shirt. He dropped everything on the floor, and just stood there. I wanted to put my hand over my mouth. I had never seen a man’s body so perfect. My eyes traveled from his head on down, then stopped. Lord have mercy.
“What do you plan on doing to me?” I asked, as he started coming toward me.
“Everything,” he said.
The man was no liar. He stroked my hair and my back, kissed my elbows, my belly, my thighs, even my knees and toes! I wanted to scream. To pull out every strand of his hair, my hair—somebody’s hair. Finally, I thought, a man who knew that breasts had feelings too. I touched him everywhere I could reach. Brushed my lips wherever I felt skin. His body was one tight muscle after another, and so hot, so big, so strong, I wanted to beg him to never stop touching me. “Lord, Lord, Lord, Lord, Lord,” I sang, as we moved like slow tornadoes. He was so considerate and smooth that by the time I heard him call out my name, I knew it was
me
he wanted.
“Franklin!”
I sighed, and my body let itself loose.
“I’m here, baby, I’m here,” he said, and kissed me on my shoulder. A river had formed in the cave ofmy belly, and I felt limp. He shivered. A moment passed, and he shivered again.
“You’re too good to be true,” he said, and lifted me up on top of him. He stared into my eyes as if he was searching for something, and after he found it we held each other like it was goodbye instead of hello. Finally, we both exhaled, and sank. We kept our arms and legs wrapped around each other like octopuses for what must have been a long
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