irritable and nasty toward them because she wanted a fix. That was all she was able to focus on. Without that, life felt unbearable to Jada. But after a few weeks, she began to see the truth in what they spoke about.
The counselors at the rehab clinic were helpful. They told her about the pitfalls of addiction; about how, going back out into the world, she could be exposed to all the same shit again. They told her about how certain situations, certain people, even certain
smells
could trigger memories and make her want to use again. Jada was proud of the fact that she hadn’t used drugs in weeks. But she began to wonder if she’d be able to keep it that way. Now that she wasn’t high anymore, all she could think about was what she’d done. She thought about all the men she’d sold herself to. She looked at her body, at all the scars that Kelly had left her with. The large scar that was left when Cara had stitched her up sopoorly particularly bothered her. It all reminded her of how she’d degraded herself. She couldn’t stand the scent of musky men. The smell brought to mind all the nasty strangers who had humped, sweated, and come all over her precious body. And more than ever she wanted to escape. Sensing that she may not be strong enough to stay clean on her own, Jada decided to try to reconnect with her family. She sat down one Sunday afternoon while she was in rehab and wrote a letter to Ava.
Dear Ava,
By now, I’m sure you heard that I got busted for drugs. The cops contacted Mommy once they arrested me, but she didn’t post my bail. I’m not sure if she didn’t have the money or if she just didn’t want to come and help me out. But, anyway, the judge gave me six months. I have to do ninety days here in rehab, and I had to do ninety days on Rikers. Rikers is no joke, and since I survived that, I believe I can survive anything. In here, they teach you that you have to accept responsibility for your actions. I can accept mine now. I was using drugs and the shit got out of control. I never thought that would happen to me. I thought I was too strong to ever get addicted. Remember when I used to tell you that only weaklings become drug addicts? I was wrong about that. Because, I did get addicted. But, I’m strong enough to beat this shit, and that’s what I’m gonna do. I just wanted to write to you and tell you that I love you. I miss you a lot and I need you to be there for me. You may be all the family I have left. Mommy is disappointed in me, and I can understand that. I’m disappointed in myself, and I’m sure you feel the same way. I’m sorry.
I hope you write me back soon. I need to hear from you.
Your sister,
Jada
Ava received her sister’s letter, and she was heartbroken. She wanted so badly to help Jada find her way. She wrote back to her sister, and after doing so she cried her
eyes
out. Their lives had taken such tragic turns. Ava looked at her sister’s plight and knew that she had to turn her lifearound before she wound up just as lost as Jada was. Ava was getting high every day. She told herself that it was only weed, but she saw how quickly smoking weed had escalated for her sister. She didn’t want to go the same route. So Ava slowed down. She started smoking less, and eventually she quit altogether. She focused on graduating, and began to take her counselor, Mrs. Lopez’s, advice. For once, she began to see life through different eyes. Her dreams took on richer colors.
Jada received her sister’s letter, and she was so excited that she practically tore it in her eagerness to read it.
Jada,
I love you. You are my sister for life. Nothing can change that, and nothing can change the fact that I have your back all the time. No matter what happens I’m here for you. I mean that. We’re in this shit together.
I’m glad you got caught. I’m so happy that you’re finally going to get some help. For a long time I suspected that you were using drugs. But, I didn’t want to
The counselors at the rehab clinic were helpful. They told her about the pitfalls of addiction; about how, going back out into the world, she could be exposed to all the same shit again. They told her about how certain situations, certain people, even certain
smells
could trigger memories and make her want to use again. Jada was proud of the fact that she hadn’t used drugs in weeks. But she began to wonder if she’d be able to keep it that way. Now that she wasn’t high anymore, all she could think about was what she’d done. She thought about all the men she’d sold herself to. She looked at her body, at all the scars that Kelly had left her with. The large scar that was left when Cara had stitched her up sopoorly particularly bothered her. It all reminded her of how she’d degraded herself. She couldn’t stand the scent of musky men. The smell brought to mind all the nasty strangers who had humped, sweated, and come all over her precious body. And more than ever she wanted to escape. Sensing that she may not be strong enough to stay clean on her own, Jada decided to try to reconnect with her family. She sat down one Sunday afternoon while she was in rehab and wrote a letter to Ava.
Dear Ava,
By now, I’m sure you heard that I got busted for drugs. The cops contacted Mommy once they arrested me, but she didn’t post my bail. I’m not sure if she didn’t have the money or if she just didn’t want to come and help me out. But, anyway, the judge gave me six months. I have to do ninety days here in rehab, and I had to do ninety days on Rikers. Rikers is no joke, and since I survived that, I believe I can survive anything. In here, they teach you that you have to accept responsibility for your actions. I can accept mine now. I was using drugs and the shit got out of control. I never thought that would happen to me. I thought I was too strong to ever get addicted. Remember when I used to tell you that only weaklings become drug addicts? I was wrong about that. Because, I did get addicted. But, I’m strong enough to beat this shit, and that’s what I’m gonna do. I just wanted to write to you and tell you that I love you. I miss you a lot and I need you to be there for me. You may be all the family I have left. Mommy is disappointed in me, and I can understand that. I’m disappointed in myself, and I’m sure you feel the same way. I’m sorry.
I hope you write me back soon. I need to hear from you.
Your sister,
Jada
Ava received her sister’s letter, and she was heartbroken. She wanted so badly to help Jada find her way. She wrote back to her sister, and after doing so she cried her
eyes
out. Their lives had taken such tragic turns. Ava looked at her sister’s plight and knew that she had to turn her lifearound before she wound up just as lost as Jada was. Ava was getting high every day. She told herself that it was only weed, but she saw how quickly smoking weed had escalated for her sister. She didn’t want to go the same route. So Ava slowed down. She started smoking less, and eventually she quit altogether. She focused on graduating, and began to take her counselor, Mrs. Lopez’s, advice. For once, she began to see life through different eyes. Her dreams took on richer colors.
Jada received her sister’s letter, and she was so excited that she practically tore it in her eagerness to read it.
Jada,
I love you. You are my sister for life. Nothing can change that, and nothing can change the fact that I have your back all the time. No matter what happens I’m here for you. I mean that. We’re in this shit together.
I’m glad you got caught. I’m so happy that you’re finally going to get some help. For a long time I suspected that you were using drugs. But, I didn’t want to
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