The Natural: How to Effortlessly Attract the Women You Want by Richard La Ruina
Authors: Richard La Ruina
Ads: Link
www.puatraining.com/openers.
6. The Mid Game
From Opener to Hook Point to Rapport
Y ou now know how to approach. You can start a conversation with a woman and get into a conversation. Now what? What do you say? How do you prevent those dreaded awkward silences? The answer lies in a simple set of conversational skills and comfort-building techniques that can be easily mastered so that you can move your interactions from the opener to the close. I call these the “skills of the natural.”
Any close—whether it’s a number close (where all you do is get a girl’s phone number), a kiss close, or a sex close—requires a certain degree of good rapport and connection. With the skills of the natural, you can learn how to easily achieve rapport with a wide variety of women. For anyone who wants to become a natural with women and feel like he’s always had that innate ability, this is the chapter to pay special attention to.
I used to be a terrible conversationalist. I was boring on dates, useless in groups, a terrible public speaker, and unable to hold people’s attention. Now I game like a natural. This means that I’m able to break down exactly what’s necessary to be a naturally good conversationalist and to generate attraction. What’s more, I can give you exercises to practice this skill on your own.
During the first minute of an interaction, you need to do most of the talking. Anything that puts the conversational pressure on the girl you’re interested in is something that she could use as an excuse to end the interaction. When she is comfortable and committed to the interaction (which could be instantly, but generally takes longer from a cold approach), you can start putting some of the conversational burden on her.
The Art of Small Talk
Women are sick of boring conversations with men. They’ve had the same ones over and over and over. If you can be different, you’ll stand out hugely and quickly generate attraction. But first, what shouldn’t you do if you’re a good conversationalist?
Avoid These Common Mistakes
I’m willing to bet that a lot of these mistakes will sound familiar to you. We’ve all made them!
Interviewing her
Many women are approached and immediately put on the spot to answer a series of questions. The man’s only response to her answers is usually, “Oh really, so …” This quickly gets boring, and any woman who puts up with this for long must either be really attracted to you or be very, very polite (or desperate).
Don’t ask a series of questions. Ask one and connect on that point; then ask another. For advanced-level skills, try to elicit the answer without asking the boring question—make an assumption or guess about what she does, where she’s from, or what food she likes. You get the same information, but it’s more interesting for her.
----
Hairdresser Conversation
What kind of conversation do you have with a hairdresser, a person in line at the post office, or the aunt you see once every six months? It’s probably boring and shallow. As in, you have the conversation but aren’t really listening and don’t really care, and it’s entirely unmemorable. Likewise, when you meet someone totally new they typically say things like, “What do you do?” “Where are you from?” “Do you like films?” Blah, blah, blah.
We all hate answering these questions over and over, yet we ask them of others! For attractive women who get approached regularly, it’s even more of a turn-off.
----
Stating the obvious
If a girl has pretty eyes, she’s probably been told that five thousand times. Find something more specific to say to her, preferably not about her appearance. Or don’t compliment her at all. It’s fine to give an obvious compliment with feeling when you’re already together, but in the early stages it’s not what she wants.
The above methods of eliciting information may either put conversational pressure on the girl or else
6. The Mid Game
From Opener to Hook Point to Rapport
Y ou now know how to approach. You can start a conversation with a woman and get into a conversation. Now what? What do you say? How do you prevent those dreaded awkward silences? The answer lies in a simple set of conversational skills and comfort-building techniques that can be easily mastered so that you can move your interactions from the opener to the close. I call these the “skills of the natural.”
Any close—whether it’s a number close (where all you do is get a girl’s phone number), a kiss close, or a sex close—requires a certain degree of good rapport and connection. With the skills of the natural, you can learn how to easily achieve rapport with a wide variety of women. For anyone who wants to become a natural with women and feel like he’s always had that innate ability, this is the chapter to pay special attention to.
I used to be a terrible conversationalist. I was boring on dates, useless in groups, a terrible public speaker, and unable to hold people’s attention. Now I game like a natural. This means that I’m able to break down exactly what’s necessary to be a naturally good conversationalist and to generate attraction. What’s more, I can give you exercises to practice this skill on your own.
During the first minute of an interaction, you need to do most of the talking. Anything that puts the conversational pressure on the girl you’re interested in is something that she could use as an excuse to end the interaction. When she is comfortable and committed to the interaction (which could be instantly, but generally takes longer from a cold approach), you can start putting some of the conversational burden on her.
The Art of Small Talk
Women are sick of boring conversations with men. They’ve had the same ones over and over and over. If you can be different, you’ll stand out hugely and quickly generate attraction. But first, what shouldn’t you do if you’re a good conversationalist?
Avoid These Common Mistakes
I’m willing to bet that a lot of these mistakes will sound familiar to you. We’ve all made them!
Interviewing her
Many women are approached and immediately put on the spot to answer a series of questions. The man’s only response to her answers is usually, “Oh really, so …” This quickly gets boring, and any woman who puts up with this for long must either be really attracted to you or be very, very polite (or desperate).
Don’t ask a series of questions. Ask one and connect on that point; then ask another. For advanced-level skills, try to elicit the answer without asking the boring question—make an assumption or guess about what she does, where she’s from, or what food she likes. You get the same information, but it’s more interesting for her.
----
Hairdresser Conversation
What kind of conversation do you have with a hairdresser, a person in line at the post office, or the aunt you see once every six months? It’s probably boring and shallow. As in, you have the conversation but aren’t really listening and don’t really care, and it’s entirely unmemorable. Likewise, when you meet someone totally new they typically say things like, “What do you do?” “Where are you from?” “Do you like films?” Blah, blah, blah.
We all hate answering these questions over and over, yet we ask them of others! For attractive women who get approached regularly, it’s even more of a turn-off.
----
Stating the obvious
If a girl has pretty eyes, she’s probably been told that five thousand times. Find something more specific to say to her, preferably not about her appearance. Or don’t compliment her at all. It’s fine to give an obvious compliment with feeling when you’re already together, but in the early stages it’s not what she wants.
The above methods of eliciting information may either put conversational pressure on the girl or else
Similar Books
