Independent Jenny by Sarah Louise Smith

annoying me anyway and I was still tired from yesterday’s journey.
    We rambled back in relative silence. It rained a little and Hayley complained about her jeans getting wet and the mud and the cold, but I was just grateful that it kept the midges away and I blocked out her moaning. Wentworth splashed around in the puddles that were forming and I smiled at him as he occasionally looked back to check we were still within sight.
    I loved it here, even more than I’d expected to. I loved not worrying about looking my best this morning to go out and meet clients. I’d just thrown on some old jeans and a comfy t-shirt. I loved the views, I loved the quiet roads and most of all I loved the fact that I was far, far away from my troubles.
    It didn’t stop me thinking about them, though. How hurt would Ross be if I were with Aiden? I liked to imagine he’d be devastated but then I thought about the girls again and considered that he might not give a damn. And I certainly didn’t feel I owed him any sensitivity.
    Back at the cottage, Hayley made us her signature dish: risotto with chicken and mushrooms. It was rather scrummy and we ate it in front of the TV before I went to bed to read. Just as I slipped under the inviting duvet, my phone lit up and I realised I had a small signal. Ross had texted me.

    Hi. Hope you arrived safe. I’m home, thinking of you. I can’t live without you, it’s so hard. Love you babe x

    I read it a few times then typed a few messages of my own.

    Hi Ross. We did arrive safe, thank you. Jen.
     
    Next, I wanted to touch base with Aiden, just let him know that he was in my thoughts.
    Hi Aiden. Thanks for your text. I hope you have a good few days. It’s beautiful here. Really lovely. Talk to you when I get back. Take care. Jenny xx

    I reread both messages. I’d been so cold to my husband yet so warm to his brother. I pictured myself returning to Bath and knew which house I’d rather go to, but I wasn’t sure if it was because Aiden didn’t make me feel hurt and rejected or if I had real, genuine feelings for him. Ugh, what a mess.
    And then there was Hayley. Who knew what tomorrow would bring with Guy. I could only hope he wasn’t going to be as amazing as she remembered.

Chapter Eighteen
     
    Hayley was up and raring to go early the next morning. Now she knew that Guy was definitely still living here, there was no stopping her. She had a little moan about the mud on her clothes from the day before, but otherwise was her upbeat cheery self. She made me a sausage sandwich while I was in the shower and then told me to eat it as fast as possible.
    “We can’t get there too early,” I told her. It wasn’t even 9am yet. “He might be in bed.”
    “Farmers get up early.”
    “Well, I don’t want to be rushed, I’m on holiday.”
    “Okay. Well just don’t take too long, I’m going crazy with anticipation.”
    “Have you called Kieran since we’ve been here?”
    “I texted him.”
    “Don’t you want to speak to him?”
    “We haven’t really had much phone signal.”
    Convenient. I didn’t want to sound like the preachy parent anymore so I let it drop. She went to get her things together and I thought about retrieving my phone but wasn’t sure I wanted to read any more texts from the men back home. I’d turned it off last night before I went to sleep and I didn’t fancy turning it on again this morning.
    I looked out of the window at the sea. It wasn’t as clear today. There were low clouds and you could only just see the outline of the mountains on the islands across the water. I could just about see a ferry coming over and wondered again what it’d be like to live somewhere really remote; so far from any large groups of people. I liked the thought. I could see myself living here, but couldn’t imagine there’d be much work, even for a wedding photographer. I’d just have to win the lottery. First, I just needed to start buying tickets.
    Maybe if I did end up with Aiden,