The Color of Secrets by Lindsay Ashford

to want it? She’ll never find anyone to adopt it.” This was followed by a heavy sigh. “I suppose it’ll end up in a home.” The knife rattled against the jar of fish paste as her mother dug it in. “Won’t it?”
    “I’ll just go and check the cake,” Eva mumbled, dashing toward the kitchen.

    The small front room was filled with people, all glad to get out of the biting October wind. It was a noisy mix of neighbors and friends, some clutching presents and others with rations to donate for the party. Cathy arrived last with a large tin of pineapple chunks, which brought cheers from the other guests.
    Dilys made a grand entrance, swanning into the room with Anton on her arm.
    “Don’t look so shocked!” she whispered to Eva. “I’m sixteen now—I can do what I like!”
    “Never mind me!” Eva hissed back. “How are you going to explain him to Mum?”
    An awkward few minutes followed, during which their mother shot speaking glances at Eva. Better to go along with the pretense that this was a new romance , Eva thought. Otherwise her mother might start asking what her daughters had really been up to on all those long Sunday walks.
    While Anton was working his charm on her mother, Dilys started opening her presents. It was an interesting assortment: “A pair of shoes, three pairs of silk stockings, a brooch, half a dozen grapefruit, and two Hershey bars! I didn’t do too badly, did I?” Dilys laughed. “Did Bill get you these?” she whispered, picking up one of the bars of chocolate, peeling back the paper and taking a big bite.
    “Dil! You’re supposed to be saving them! What about all this food?” Eva waved her hand at the table.
    “It’s only one bite!” Dilys grinned, stuffing the chocolate back into its wrapper. “Anyway, I’ve got to keep my strength up.” Eva shot her a worried glance, but her sister was too busy examining her presents to notice. “I’m starting my training next week,” she said, without looking up.
    “What training?”
    “I’ve signed up for the Auxiliary Territorial Service,” Dilys said. “Didn’t I tell you? I’ve been planning it for ages.”
    Eva stared at her sister. “Does Mum know?”
    “I haven’t told her yet—thought I’d wait till after the party.”
    “Oh, Dil . . . ” Eva bit her lip.
    “Listen,” Dilys said, “I’m sorry if it’s a bit of a shock, but I can’t go on like this.” She fingered the rhinestone pin in the shape of a D that Anton had given her for her birthday. “ You might not mind skulking about, hiding from people, but I do. The ATS camp is just down the road from Anton’s barracks. We can be together— really together.” Her expression was one Eva remembered her using as a child when she was trying to wheedle something out of their father. “You do understand, don’t you?”
    “Well, yes . . . but you’re so—”
    “You mustn’t breathe a word of this to Mum,” Dilys cut in, glancing over her shoulder, “but Anton’s asked me to marry him! He wants me to go back to Holland with him when the war’s over!”
    “What?” Eva’s jaw dropped. A jumble of words rushed through her head, but she felt numb, paralyzed. A thin cry from the room above broke the spell. “That’s David,” she said, “the noise must have woken him up.” She made for the door, glad of an excuse to get away. For the first time in her life she had looked at her sister and felt jealous.
    Eva scooped David up in her arms, rocking him in an effort to comfort him. “Nanna gone?” he lisped, pointing to the door. “Dilly gone?”
    “They’re downstairs, sweetheart,” she said. “We’ll go and see them in a minute. Let’s just change you first.” She laid him on the bed and rolled down his rompers. He kicked his legs as she did it.
    “Want Dilly! Want Nanna!” he cried.
    Eva shushed him, wondering what Bill would think if he could see her now. She tried to imagine David calling his name, following him around the way he