Sins of the Father by Angela Benson

thought I’d feel this way about a woman again, but you changed that for me.”
    “You make me happy, too. That’s why I had to come over. I needed to hear your voice,
     feel your arms around me.”
    He squeezed her shoulders. “Tell me what had you so upset.”
    “Abraham.”
    “Has he taken a turn for the worse? I was there with Saralyn this morning when she
     got the news about the doctors inducing the coma.”
    She shook her head. “Not really. It’s me. I feel so guilty, Melvin. My children are
     hurting and it’s all my fault.”
    “You can’t blame yourself,” he told her. “You made some mistakes a long time ago.
     God has forgiven you, now you need to forgive yourself.”
    “I was on my way to doing that until Abraham burst into our lives again. He’s turned
     everything upside down, brought back a lot of painful memories.”
    “I thought you were glad he’d finally acknowledged your kids.”
    She eased out of his arms and got up from the couch. She couldn’t have this discussion
     sitting down. “Of course I’m glad. It’s about time. But I’m also angry that it took
     him so long. My feelings are all over the place.” She tucked her hands in the pockets
     of her jeans. “Why does life have to be so complicated?”
    “Because we have free will, which is a double-edged sword. We’re free to make good
     and bad decisions. In exchange, we have to suffer the consequences of those decisions.”
    “Sometimes I think God is laughing at us.”
    Melvin shook his head. “Never. He’s crying with you. He doesn’t like to see you suffer.
     That’s why He always makes sure your suffering is not in vain. You’ll benefit from
     it or someone else will.”
    “I understand that, but why do my kids have to suffer the consequences of my actions?
     They’re innocent.”
    Melvin got up and walked to her, pulling her into his arms again. “That’s why you
     have to trust Him. There’s one thing you can be sure of: As much as you love your
     kids, God loves them more. That knowledge should comfort you.”
    “I know it should, and most times it does. But when I see them suffer and know that
     my decisions caused it, it’s hard. It’s real hard.”
    “That’s why I’m here, so that you can lean on me during the difficult times. I’m God’s
     gift to you.”
    “I know,” she said, her eyes filling with tears. “I know there are other women better
     for you than me, but I’m so happy that you’re in my life.”
    “There is no other woman for me, Leah, and I want to shout it to the world. How many
     times do I have to tell you?”
    She wished she could be as open with their relationship as he wanted her to be, but
     for now she was much more comfortable keeping it a secret. She hadn’t even told Deborah
     or Michael. “People would talk,” she told him.
    He snorted. “People always talk. That’s a given. Talk doesn’t bother me, and it shouldn’t
     bother you.”
    “You’re a preacher,” she said. “You need a woman who’s above reproach, as the Bible
     says.”
    He chuckled. “You’re above reproach.”
    She pulled out of his arms. “You know what I mean. You need a woman without a past,
     especially a past like mine. Melvin, I have two kids and have never been married.”
    “So? That was then; this is now. You can’t live in the past. You can’t keep beating
     yourself up about it.”
    This was a conversation they’d had many times. He was patient with her, but she wondered
     how long his patience would endure. “Once the women in your church find out you’re
     seeing me, they’re going to beat up on you.”
    He pulled her close again. “I’m tough. I can take it.”
    She met his eyes. “Can you take Saralyn Martin? She’ll enjoy running my name down
     to your congregation.”
    “Let me handle Sister Martin.”
    Saralyn and Abraham were big shots at Faith Community, where Melvin pastored, and
     they wielded a great deal of influence. If her relationship with Melvin