way.” Katie Ann shook her head. “We should pray for the family.”
“ Ya. ” Ivan bowed his head with her, then he looked up and took a deep breath. “He wasn’t much older than I am.”
“I know.”
“Just goes to show you that you should live each and every day to the ful est.”
Katie Ann bit her bottom lip for a moment and she twisted her coffee cup in her hands. “That’s what I want us to do, Ivan. Live each day to the ful est.”
She smiled as she set her cup down on the table.
“We are.” Ivan put his glasses back on and once again buried his head in the newspaper, reading about what people in Amish and Mennonite communities across the country were doing. Didn’t he see what was happening right here, in his own home?
“Ivan?”
“ Ya. ”
She waited until he put the paper down on the table and gave her his ful attention. “I love you.”
“I love you too.”
Then why can’t you look me in the eye when you say it?
“I reckon I’l start breakfast. What would you like? I can scramble us some eggs, or I can just make us some kaffi soup.” She stood up from the table and put on her apron.
“It doesn’t matter to me.”
Does anything matter to you? “Eggs I guess, then.” She walked to the refrigerator and found a few eggs, then began cracking them into a bowl. “I’l be glad when we have our own chickens again. These store-bought eggs are nothing like fresh eggs. The yolks are light yel ow, just not fresh. I can always tel the difference, can’t you?”
He gave a nod. “Uh-huh.”
“What are your plans today? With this weather, I reckon we can finish unpacking.”
“ Ya . We can do that.”
She fought the knot in her throat and swal owed hard as she stirred the eggs. “Or . . .” She spun around to face him. “We could do something that we haven’t done in years.”
“What’s that?”
Katie Ann wanted to yank the newspaper away from his face, but instead she took a deep breath and blew it out slowly. “We could just—just stay in bed al day. Remember when we were first married, the day everyone was snowed in? No one could get out, and we just stayed in bed al day.” She waited for him to look at her. When he didn’t, she boldly went on. “We just made love al day long.”
“We’re not snowed in.”
Her eyes wel ed with tears. “Look at me, Ivan.”
He folded the paper, placed it on the table, then folded his hands on top of it. “Why are you yel ing?”
“I’m not yel ing. I just want you to look at me.” Egg dripped from the wooden spoon and onto the floor as she spoke.
Ivan put his glasses on the table and for the first time this morning, he looked into her eyes. “What is it, Katie Ann?”
“I’m asking you if you want to spend the day with me. Like—like we did that day we were snowed in so long ago.” She held her breath.
“We’re not snowed in and—”
“I know that, Ivan.” She put the spoon on the counter, then moved a few steps toward him. “And I know there is much work to be done around here. But I’m asking you if you want to spend the day together...” She paused as she blinked back tears, which only made her feel pitiful and ridiculous. But she pressed on. “Just you and me. Making love al day.”
Ivan raised his hand to his forehead, and Katie Ann wondered if he was going to rub the skin off as his hand went back and forth. “I thought we’d been through al this, that we were going to stop trying to have a baby. It’s just not in God’s plan, Katie Ann.”
She sat down across the table from him. “I’m not talking about trying to make a baby, Ivan. I’m talking about a husband and wife spending the day together, just loving each other.” She reached for his hand, then squeezed. “This is a new beginning for us. I want to spend time in your arms, in this new place, in our bed.”
Ivan raised his shoulders, then dropped them slowly. “Okay.”
Katie Ann felt like she’d been punched in the gut. She
“ Ya. ” Ivan bowed his head with her, then he looked up and took a deep breath. “He wasn’t much older than I am.”
“I know.”
“Just goes to show you that you should live each and every day to the ful est.”
Katie Ann bit her bottom lip for a moment and she twisted her coffee cup in her hands. “That’s what I want us to do, Ivan. Live each day to the ful est.”
She smiled as she set her cup down on the table.
“We are.” Ivan put his glasses back on and once again buried his head in the newspaper, reading about what people in Amish and Mennonite communities across the country were doing. Didn’t he see what was happening right here, in his own home?
“Ivan?”
“ Ya. ”
She waited until he put the paper down on the table and gave her his ful attention. “I love you.”
“I love you too.”
Then why can’t you look me in the eye when you say it?
“I reckon I’l start breakfast. What would you like? I can scramble us some eggs, or I can just make us some kaffi soup.” She stood up from the table and put on her apron.
“It doesn’t matter to me.”
Does anything matter to you? “Eggs I guess, then.” She walked to the refrigerator and found a few eggs, then began cracking them into a bowl. “I’l be glad when we have our own chickens again. These store-bought eggs are nothing like fresh eggs. The yolks are light yel ow, just not fresh. I can always tel the difference, can’t you?”
He gave a nod. “Uh-huh.”
“What are your plans today? With this weather, I reckon we can finish unpacking.”
“ Ya . We can do that.”
She fought the knot in her throat and swal owed hard as she stirred the eggs. “Or . . .” She spun around to face him. “We could do something that we haven’t done in years.”
“What’s that?”
Katie Ann wanted to yank the newspaper away from his face, but instead she took a deep breath and blew it out slowly. “We could just—just stay in bed al day. Remember when we were first married, the day everyone was snowed in? No one could get out, and we just stayed in bed al day.” She waited for him to look at her. When he didn’t, she boldly went on. “We just made love al day long.”
“We’re not snowed in.”
Her eyes wel ed with tears. “Look at me, Ivan.”
He folded the paper, placed it on the table, then folded his hands on top of it. “Why are you yel ing?”
“I’m not yel ing. I just want you to look at me.” Egg dripped from the wooden spoon and onto the floor as she spoke.
Ivan put his glasses on the table and for the first time this morning, he looked into her eyes. “What is it, Katie Ann?”
“I’m asking you if you want to spend the day with me. Like—like we did that day we were snowed in so long ago.” She held her breath.
“We’re not snowed in and—”
“I know that, Ivan.” She put the spoon on the counter, then moved a few steps toward him. “And I know there is much work to be done around here. But I’m asking you if you want to spend the day together...” She paused as she blinked back tears, which only made her feel pitiful and ridiculous. But she pressed on. “Just you and me. Making love al day.”
Ivan raised his hand to his forehead, and Katie Ann wondered if he was going to rub the skin off as his hand went back and forth. “I thought we’d been through al this, that we were going to stop trying to have a baby. It’s just not in God’s plan, Katie Ann.”
She sat down across the table from him. “I’m not talking about trying to make a baby, Ivan. I’m talking about a husband and wife spending the day together, just loving each other.” She reached for his hand, then squeezed. “This is a new beginning for us. I want to spend time in your arms, in this new place, in our bed.”
Ivan raised his shoulders, then dropped them slowly. “Okay.”
Katie Ann felt like she’d been punched in the gut. She
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