Rules for Werewolves by Kirk Lynn

history.
    —It’s old history. We’re making new history.
    —Does anybody else know what you’re doing? Does Malcolm know you’re recording over shit?
    —I dunno. I think almost everybody’s asleep. They wrote all night. Did you read it all yet?
    —I read everything y’all wrote tonight. It goes pretty fast. I’ve got some of the old pages Malcolm gave me from some of the earlier changes. But I was gonna save that for the middle of the night. I thought I would just talk for a while. How about that, Susan? I’ll just talk to you for a while and thenlater, if I get tired, I’ll have something new to entertain the two of us. And then we’ll just do reruns until everybody wakes up to write some more.
    —Tell Susan how I look.
    —We already did that, Angel. Are you still drunk?
    —You told her what I was wearing. But you didn’t tell her whether or not you liked it.
    —Angel’s feeling goofy or something, Susan. She’s goofing around.
    —But I got nobody to goof around with.
    —I can’t goof around. I gotta watch Susan.
    —Well, let’s read the old pages. Let’s get them onto tape so they can be preserved! I got out the tape recorder because I wanna record Susan’s entire change. I wanna update our records from paper to something more modern. What time is it?
    —I don’t know.
    —Ask Susan what time it is. She has the watch.
    —What time is it, Susan?
    —These pages are ancient. The paper’s yellow. It’s weird, isn’t it, to imagine older werewolves? Who do you think is the oldest now?
    —Anquille. Or you.
    —It’s not me. I’m eighteen.
    —Me, too.
    —I know you’re not eighteen.
    —How would you know?
    —Susan told me. She told me the two of you hooked up.
    —So?
    —You think she’s jealous? Listening to us out here? While she’s all tied up in there?
    —There’s no reason to be jealous, Susan.
    —We could give her a reason to be jealous.
    —I’m supposed to keep watch.
    —We could do whatever we want and then when she comes out we could just tell her we were joking and she would never know the truth.
    —I’m not gonna try to make Susan jealous.
    —Well, what about you? You jealous that she was gonna go out to meet some guy tonight?
    —She’s not going out.
    —She might.
    —She’s tied up in the closet.
    —You don’t know that. You can’t see her.
    —I don’t need to. I know. My attention is focused on her.
    —But you’re getting tired and once you fall asleep you can’t control what your attention gets focused on. You fall asleep, you might start dreaming about me.
    —I’m not gonna fall asleep. I’m Susan’s reader.
    —Fine. Then read something to her.

26
The Story of Doug .
    —This is the story of Doug. Doug was the first one of us to change. Not the first change ever, but the first change in our group. This was back when we all camped out behind that bar on Navasota called Nasty’s.
    —That’s in San Antonio.
    —How do you know?
    —I know where famous bars are. I make it my business to know. I’m gonna write a book someday about getting thrown out of all of ’em. Wouldn’t you buy that shit? A history of the circumstances under which I get thrown out of all the most famous bars in the world. The White Horse in New York. Heinold’s in Oakland. Harry’s New York Bar is in Paris. And Nasty’s is in San Antonio. It’s not famous. But I think I’ve been kicked out of it.
    —Did you know Doug?
    —No, I think that was back before I was a part of the group. When I had a separate life.
    —“The guys at Nasty’s knew we were camped out back there. The cops knew. It’s different now with the cops. I mean, this is before we were breaking into houses. The cops would come back and visit us, but not really chase us.”
    —I don’t know which is worse, getting chased by the cops or getting “visited.”
    —“We kept a little campfire fire going back there. And everybody had a little area. If it rained we would put up a tarp, but if you