Not when everything is out in the open and there are no more lies between us.
"You don't have a choice," I tell him, putting my foot down.
He shakes his head. "Don't piss me off more than I already am."
He walks down the sidewalk that leads off campus. I follow. If he starts to jog, there's no way I can keep up with him.
"I didn't intend to piss you off," I tell him, matching his stride.
"Just ruin my life?"
"Me? I didn't ruin your life, Caleb. You've done that just fine on your own."
"Do me a favor. If you're so intent on joining me, keep the blabber to a minimum."
"You're crabby."
"Damn straight." He stops and turns to me. "Do you know what you did to me today? You made me give up information I promised to take to my grave. I feel like shit."
"If it makes you feel better, I feel like shit too. I don't want you to be pissed or sad, Caleb."
"If you want me to be happy, go back to the dorm."
I think he actually expects me to stop following him. But I don't. I can't.
For the next ten minutes, I follow him in silence. His pace is slow enough that I can keep up.
"What's the plan?" I ask when we reach the center of town. Every store is closed for the night and the streets are completely dark except for the occasional streetlight. "I hope you have one."
"I don't." He looks defeated.
"We're in this together, at least," I say, in a weak attempt to cheer him up.
"Then let me hold your backpack."
Our footsteps on the sidewalk make a rhythmic sound that echoes through the night. We walk through a residential neighborhood on the edge of town. Every fifteen minutes or so, when Caleb spots a big rock or a bench, he orders me to sit and rest my leg.
"We should stop here," he says when we reach a toddler park. In the middle of the playground is a big wooden castle with jungle gyms, wobbly bridges, and slides attached to every side of the structure. I nod.
Caleb leads me to the castle. We have to crouch down to get through the small entrance. It's hard, but he braces my back and supports me while I maneuver inside the cramped space designed for little kids.
Caleb sits in the corner on wood chips. He pulls a jacket from his duffle and places it on the ground next to him. "Sit next to me," he says. "You can use my leg as a pillow."
I'm glad we stopped. I have no clue what time it is, but the sun isn't up yet and I'm running on fumes.
I see a blue plastic tube sticking out from his duffle. "What's that?" I ask, pointing to it.
He pulls it out and pushes a button. The blue plastic lights up. "It's my lightsaber."
"I remember you used to chase me and Leah around your house with that thing."
"Those were the good of days." Caleb waves the lightsaber around, lighting up the inside of the castle.
I reach out and take the lightsaber from him. "You think I'd be a good warrior?" I ask.
"No. You follow the enemy too closely."
"You're not the enemy," I tell him, then bring the lightsaber down to strike his leg.
He catches the lightsaber in his hand before it reaches its intended destination. Our eyes meet, and the bright blue light illuminates both our faces. "I am the enemy, Maggie. You just haven't realized it yet."
"You're wrong." When he turns the lightsaber off and stashes it back in his duffle, I lean into him and get into as comfortable a position as I can. "Wouldn't it be cool if this was a real castle?"
"Only if I was the king of it." He looks up at the sky. "But I'd prefer a castle with a roof over it."
"We can pretend, can't we?"
"Yeah, we can pretend."
Pretending is nice, especially when it takes you away from your problems and worries. "Do you ever think of Mrs. Reynolds?"
"She was hilarious." His mouth quirks up, remembering. "I loved the look on your face when she made you wear that dress to plant flowers in."
"It was a muumuu."
"It was ugly as sin."
"I know. I think of her every day. If it wasn't for her..."
"If it wasn't for her, you probably wouldn't be here lying in wood chips with an ex-con running
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