their lips crashed down upon one another.
CHAPTER FOURTEEN
The elevator doors closed in slow motion as Cole looked up from his kiss straight into my eyes. I stumbled backwards against the wall, as if a ton of bricks had just hit my chest knocking all of the wind out of my body. I couldn’t breathe and I instantly felt a panic attack coming on. Hold it together, Reagan, there are people from your office here tonight, don’t lose it, not yet, just get to the car.
I forced one foot in front of the other, and before I knew it I was running through the lobby towards the valet attendant. I threw my pass at the young man I’d come to know over the past few months and braced my knees, trying to keep myself from toppling over. My breath was so rapid I was terrified I’d hyperventilate right there.
“Ms. Larson is everything okay?” he asked.
In between breaths I choked out as many words as my body would allow. “Yes.Car.Please.” I said, trying to catch my breath between each word.
He walked over towards me and placed a hand on my shoulder. “Are you sure you should be driving?”
“Just.Hurry.” I choked out, holding back the sobs that were ripping through my chest.
He was back in no time, and I was so grateful, before I could fully stand back up he was at my side, pulling me close to him as he helped me into my SUV. Closing my door behind me, I hit the gas and flew out of the parking lot. I had to get as far away from that hotel as physically possible, so I jumped on the interstate and just drove as fast as I could. I continued fighting the tears, knowing the minute I even let one escape it would be over, and I’d be too distraught to even drive. I turned the air conditioner on full blast, and pointed it straight at my face in the hopes that it would hold the tears back, and potentially help me calm my rapid breathing before I passed out. After twenty minutes of driving I’d finally arrived at exactly where I thought I needed to be. I threw my car in park, flung the door open, and collapsed on the patch of grass in front of me.
Catching myself, before my face smacked the ground, a sob escaped my throat and that was it, the tears pierced my eyelids and quickly began spilling over them as if someone had just turned the water faucet on full blast. Resting on my knees, I draped my arms around my stomach, when I lurched over holding myself as tight as possible, trying to keep from convulsing. But it was too hard, the sobs were so deep I was trembling from head to toe. My body ached like it’s never ached before. Within a matter of thirty minutes I had gone from feeling completely on top of the world to feeling as if I had been hit time and time again by a semi-truck. Trying to compose myself, I leaned back against the tree that was to my right. I rested my head, and through my tear filled eyes, I came face to face with their headstone.
In Loving Memory of Sophia and Christopher Larson, Beloved Mother and Father. Bad idea, Reagan! In my head I’d thought it would’ve been a good idea to be this close to my mom and dad given my current state, but upon seeing their headstone I quickly realized it was the complete opposite. Grabbing for the tree I pulled myself up off the ground, trying to balance myself as my stilettos sunk into the lush green grass.
“How could you both leave me?” I shrieked at their headstone. Tears pouring even harder, now that I’d added my parents into the mix of things. I stood there for a minute, actually thinking I may have gotten a response. “Why? I needed you both and you just left me, no warning, just gone!” I continued shouting through sobs. “Was I not good enough, did I not deserve either of you? Do I not deserve Cole? What is wrong with me, why does everyone I love get taken away?” My body was thoroughly exhausted as I fell back down to my knees. Sobbing, I leaned against their headstone and wrapped my arms around my body. I sat there crying, all alone, in the
CHAPTER FOURTEEN
The elevator doors closed in slow motion as Cole looked up from his kiss straight into my eyes. I stumbled backwards against the wall, as if a ton of bricks had just hit my chest knocking all of the wind out of my body. I couldn’t breathe and I instantly felt a panic attack coming on. Hold it together, Reagan, there are people from your office here tonight, don’t lose it, not yet, just get to the car.
I forced one foot in front of the other, and before I knew it I was running through the lobby towards the valet attendant. I threw my pass at the young man I’d come to know over the past few months and braced my knees, trying to keep myself from toppling over. My breath was so rapid I was terrified I’d hyperventilate right there.
“Ms. Larson is everything okay?” he asked.
In between breaths I choked out as many words as my body would allow. “Yes.Car.Please.” I said, trying to catch my breath between each word.
He walked over towards me and placed a hand on my shoulder. “Are you sure you should be driving?”
“Just.Hurry.” I choked out, holding back the sobs that were ripping through my chest.
He was back in no time, and I was so grateful, before I could fully stand back up he was at my side, pulling me close to him as he helped me into my SUV. Closing my door behind me, I hit the gas and flew out of the parking lot. I had to get as far away from that hotel as physically possible, so I jumped on the interstate and just drove as fast as I could. I continued fighting the tears, knowing the minute I even let one escape it would be over, and I’d be too distraught to even drive. I turned the air conditioner on full blast, and pointed it straight at my face in the hopes that it would hold the tears back, and potentially help me calm my rapid breathing before I passed out. After twenty minutes of driving I’d finally arrived at exactly where I thought I needed to be. I threw my car in park, flung the door open, and collapsed on the patch of grass in front of me.
Catching myself, before my face smacked the ground, a sob escaped my throat and that was it, the tears pierced my eyelids and quickly began spilling over them as if someone had just turned the water faucet on full blast. Resting on my knees, I draped my arms around my stomach, when I lurched over holding myself as tight as possible, trying to keep from convulsing. But it was too hard, the sobs were so deep I was trembling from head to toe. My body ached like it’s never ached before. Within a matter of thirty minutes I had gone from feeling completely on top of the world to feeling as if I had been hit time and time again by a semi-truck. Trying to compose myself, I leaned back against the tree that was to my right. I rested my head, and through my tear filled eyes, I came face to face with their headstone.
In Loving Memory of Sophia and Christopher Larson, Beloved Mother and Father. Bad idea, Reagan! In my head I’d thought it would’ve been a good idea to be this close to my mom and dad given my current state, but upon seeing their headstone I quickly realized it was the complete opposite. Grabbing for the tree I pulled myself up off the ground, trying to balance myself as my stilettos sunk into the lush green grass.
“How could you both leave me?” I shrieked at their headstone. Tears pouring even harder, now that I’d added my parents into the mix of things. I stood there for a minute, actually thinking I may have gotten a response. “Why? I needed you both and you just left me, no warning, just gone!” I continued shouting through sobs. “Was I not good enough, did I not deserve either of you? Do I not deserve Cole? What is wrong with me, why does everyone I love get taken away?” My body was thoroughly exhausted as I fell back down to my knees. Sobbing, I leaned against their headstone and wrapped my arms around my body. I sat there crying, all alone, in the
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