make sure my wife wasn’t cheating.”
The Leader
had the upper hand today, “Like I said to that Russian moron, Bears-Packers
kick off is in like three minutes. So… make this quick.”
“Well, as
a gesture of goodwill, you are invited to our thanks giving party this year.
How does that sound kid?”
“Ok, I am
listening.”
“Also, we
know you love fireworks. We can’t lift the fireworks embargo, but how about a
visit to Beijing or Shanghai, for our Chinese New year celebrations?”
“Hong
Kong.”
“Kid you
are busting my balls here. Shanghai and Beijing are way better than that cesspit.
Trust me. Plus the whole ‘free media’ will be there.”
“Alright,
I will think about it. Rodgers is lining up. I don’t plan to miss a single snap
this season.”
“Well kid.
Take care. No more stunts without telling us. That’s all we ask for.”
“The
Leader can’t promise anything. Bye.”
By the end
of the first quarter the Pack were up 10-0. No surprises there. As long as they
had Rodgers, the Pack always had a chance. No personnel, coaching or front
office shenanigans was going to change that. Sort of like himself and the DPRK.
As long as North Korea had him as their Leader, they were always in the game.
Just as
the Leader was ready to dive into his mock KFC bucket, he was informed that the
Russian Foreign Minister wanted to chat.
The Leader
grabbed the receiver and barked, “What is this asshole day? Sergey you dried up
piece of shit, how dare you call me? Where are your protocols mofo? I am not
talking to anyone lower than Anna Fucking Petrova herself.”
“…nobody
talks to Sergey like that….”
The Leader
hung up the phone. He had no intention of missing a bear beat down.
Chapter 14
Kremlin, Moscow
Anna
Petrova felt invincible that morning. Walking the Kremlin’s power corridors,
she finally felt ‘in place’. In the past year she had been jerked around by one
dumb crisis after another, plus the Russian bureaucracy hadn’t helped either. Not
anymore. Not anymore.
Everything
looked different in Project Catie’s glow. Her guards Mika, Marat and
Vlad had become more respectful towards her. No kid gloves.
To execute Project Catie and revive the Russian glory, she needed a few people. Not
too many to fuck it up, but just a couple maybe. Sergey Luzkhov, had been rising
through the Foreign Ministry, ever since 90s. Being the second most powerful
dude in her administration, he had helped her navigate Crimea and the ensuing sanctions.
Above all he seemed to be a Patriot who believed in Russia.
Sergey
Luzkhov, the bespectacled diplomat and patriot stood up as the President walked
into his office. He seemed flustered.
“Morning
Sergey. Everything alright?”
“Dimitroff
our man in Pyongyang has failed. I tried to do damage control and I ended up
making things worse. My responsibility.” Luzkhov put up his hands defensively.
“What did
you do?” asked Anna apprehensively. Was Sergey cracking?
“Well I
broke protocol and spoke to that punk directly and he got pissed. Now he will
only talk to you.”
Anna was slightly
relieved. Project Catie was going to hurt a ton of countries, but The
DPRK probably wasn’t one. The dumb brat could come in handy later. She didn’t
have much to lose.
“Ok, fine.
Get him on the phone right now. What does he want in return for the tiger?”
“God knows
what that bum wants. Probably S-400 SAMs. Or aid… but most likely cocaine.”
“Don’t
overthink it Sergey.”
“Ok Ma’am,
but just make that you address him as Dear Leader or Leader.”
Five
minutes later President Petrova was on the phone with the Great Leader.
Unlike the
prickly conversation with Sergey, the Leader was quite jovial. The Packers had
delivered the bear beat down.
“Hello
Madam President. How are you?”
“He is
probably high,” whispered Sergey.
“Leader,
thank you for taking my call. You can call me Anna.”
“Oh ok,
Anna… Anna I
The Leader
had the upper hand today, “Like I said to that Russian moron, Bears-Packers
kick off is in like three minutes. So… make this quick.”
“Well, as
a gesture of goodwill, you are invited to our thanks giving party this year.
How does that sound kid?”
“Ok, I am
listening.”
“Also, we
know you love fireworks. We can’t lift the fireworks embargo, but how about a
visit to Beijing or Shanghai, for our Chinese New year celebrations?”
“Hong
Kong.”
“Kid you
are busting my balls here. Shanghai and Beijing are way better than that cesspit.
Trust me. Plus the whole ‘free media’ will be there.”
“Alright,
I will think about it. Rodgers is lining up. I don’t plan to miss a single snap
this season.”
“Well kid.
Take care. No more stunts without telling us. That’s all we ask for.”
“The
Leader can’t promise anything. Bye.”
By the end
of the first quarter the Pack were up 10-0. No surprises there. As long as they
had Rodgers, the Pack always had a chance. No personnel, coaching or front
office shenanigans was going to change that. Sort of like himself and the DPRK.
As long as North Korea had him as their Leader, they were always in the game.
Just as
the Leader was ready to dive into his mock KFC bucket, he was informed that the
Russian Foreign Minister wanted to chat.
The Leader
grabbed the receiver and barked, “What is this asshole day? Sergey you dried up
piece of shit, how dare you call me? Where are your protocols mofo? I am not
talking to anyone lower than Anna Fucking Petrova herself.”
“…nobody
talks to Sergey like that….”
The Leader
hung up the phone. He had no intention of missing a bear beat down.
Chapter 14
Kremlin, Moscow
Anna
Petrova felt invincible that morning. Walking the Kremlin’s power corridors,
she finally felt ‘in place’. In the past year she had been jerked around by one
dumb crisis after another, plus the Russian bureaucracy hadn’t helped either. Not
anymore. Not anymore.
Everything
looked different in Project Catie’s glow. Her guards Mika, Marat and
Vlad had become more respectful towards her. No kid gloves.
To execute Project Catie and revive the Russian glory, she needed a few people. Not
too many to fuck it up, but just a couple maybe. Sergey Luzkhov, had been rising
through the Foreign Ministry, ever since 90s. Being the second most powerful
dude in her administration, he had helped her navigate Crimea and the ensuing sanctions.
Above all he seemed to be a Patriot who believed in Russia.
Sergey
Luzkhov, the bespectacled diplomat and patriot stood up as the President walked
into his office. He seemed flustered.
“Morning
Sergey. Everything alright?”
“Dimitroff
our man in Pyongyang has failed. I tried to do damage control and I ended up
making things worse. My responsibility.” Luzkhov put up his hands defensively.
“What did
you do?” asked Anna apprehensively. Was Sergey cracking?
“Well I
broke protocol and spoke to that punk directly and he got pissed. Now he will
only talk to you.”
Anna was slightly
relieved. Project Catie was going to hurt a ton of countries, but The
DPRK probably wasn’t one. The dumb brat could come in handy later. She didn’t
have much to lose.
“Ok, fine.
Get him on the phone right now. What does he want in return for the tiger?”
“God knows
what that bum wants. Probably S-400 SAMs. Or aid… but most likely cocaine.”
“Don’t
overthink it Sergey.”
“Ok Ma’am,
but just make that you address him as Dear Leader or Leader.”
Five
minutes later President Petrova was on the phone with the Great Leader.
Unlike the
prickly conversation with Sergey, the Leader was quite jovial. The Packers had
delivered the bear beat down.
“Hello
Madam President. How are you?”
“He is
probably high,” whispered Sergey.
“Leader,
thank you for taking my call. You can call me Anna.”
“Oh ok,
Anna… Anna I
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