dishes unwashed in
the sink and the box of cereal open on the counter. He scratched
his ass, slipped into his clothes—the same clothes he wore the day
before—and headed off to work.
At the exact moment Josh started
the car, he was officially two hours late, which, for Josh, was
right on schedule. Some people at the office where Josh works
couldn't figure out the mystery of how someone could constantly be
late and not get fired. Though everyone was too afraid to ask, the
answer was quite simple: Months ago, Michelle had phoned Josh's
boss, Dan Guntherson, and asked that Josh's hours be changed.
Instead of arriving at nine like everyone else, she requested
Josh's arrival time be set for noon. Neither Michelle, nor Dan
Guntherson had bothered to tell Josh of the change, so technically
he was always on time and didn't even know it.
There was one drawback to the
otherwise perfect plan. Instead of leaving work at five like
everyone else in the office, Josh often stayed until eight—mostly
because he would fall asleep around four and no one ever bothered
to wake him. In that manner, Josh always got the full day's hours,
but since he thought his workday started at nine, he had grown an
enlarged sense of self-worth for all of the overtime he had put in
over the years. Josh was amazed, absolutely mind-blown, that the
company hadn't recognized his value and promoted him to senior
management, though he was positive that recognition would happen
any day.
As Josh drove to work that
afternoon, he noticed things around town seemed much livelier than
usual. There were camera crews in front the liquor store, people
were in the parking lot holding balloons, and everyone was smiling.
A huge banner stretched across the highway: "Congratulations,
Madison! We Got Us A Winner!"
Josh couldn't figure what all the
hubbub was about. He shrugged and wondered if maybe the circus was
coming to town. "Ooh," he said, smiling. Then the smile turned to a
frown, and he huffed. "Shelly will have a fit if I go. She never
lets me have any fun."
While still thinking about
elephants and circus clowns, Josh walked into the office building
to find everyone huddled together, talking about the big news.
Madison was a small place where everyone knew almost everyone else,
so right then, most people were keeping an eye on the television,
waiting for the news reporter's announcement.
"Well, we all showed up so clearly
none of us won." Dan Guntherson laughed.
"Can you imagine?" Joe from
accounting said. "I bet the lucky bastard is already on a jet to
the Bahamas."
"They're probably scared to come
forward," Dan Guntherson said. "You know, all the vultures come out
of the woodwork when they smell money. What do you think,
Josh?"
"Huh?" Josh was daydreaming about
tightrope walkers falling to their deaths.
Dan Guntherson gestured to the
television.
"Oh," Josh said. "The circus.
Yeah, I don't think I'm going to go this year."
Everyone laughed.
"You're right!" Abdul from
marketing slapped Josh on the back. "There's a circus out there,
and none of us
are invited!"
Everyone laughed again.
Dan Guntherson punched Josh in the
shoulder. "Good one!"
"Err, thanks," Josh said, not
understanding what was so funny about a second-rate
circus.
"Seriously though," Dan Guntherson
said, "I can't believe one of our own hit nearly a billion dollars.
God, what I wouldn't do to have a share of that."
"I'd sell out my own grandmother
for only half a mil," Lisa from the mailroom said, nodding her head
with that not bad look on face.
"I'd buy bitcoins!" Ken the intern
shouted. "Lots a lots a lots a bitcoin, yeah!"
"And Christ," Dan Guntherson
continued, "the numbers they played…it's no wonder there was only
one winner. It must have been some kind of joke."
Everyone, except for Josh, burst
out laughing again.
Josh furrowed his brow and looked
at each of his coworkers huddled around the television. The burned
out light bulb in his head momentarily caught a spark. He
whispered,
the sink and the box of cereal open on the counter. He scratched
his ass, slipped into his clothes—the same clothes he wore the day
before—and headed off to work.
At the exact moment Josh started
the car, he was officially two hours late, which, for Josh, was
right on schedule. Some people at the office where Josh works
couldn't figure out the mystery of how someone could constantly be
late and not get fired. Though everyone was too afraid to ask, the
answer was quite simple: Months ago, Michelle had phoned Josh's
boss, Dan Guntherson, and asked that Josh's hours be changed.
Instead of arriving at nine like everyone else, she requested
Josh's arrival time be set for noon. Neither Michelle, nor Dan
Guntherson had bothered to tell Josh of the change, so technically
he was always on time and didn't even know it.
There was one drawback to the
otherwise perfect plan. Instead of leaving work at five like
everyone else in the office, Josh often stayed until eight—mostly
because he would fall asleep around four and no one ever bothered
to wake him. In that manner, Josh always got the full day's hours,
but since he thought his workday started at nine, he had grown an
enlarged sense of self-worth for all of the overtime he had put in
over the years. Josh was amazed, absolutely mind-blown, that the
company hadn't recognized his value and promoted him to senior
management, though he was positive that recognition would happen
any day.
As Josh drove to work that
afternoon, he noticed things around town seemed much livelier than
usual. There were camera crews in front the liquor store, people
were in the parking lot holding balloons, and everyone was smiling.
A huge banner stretched across the highway: "Congratulations,
Madison! We Got Us A Winner!"
Josh couldn't figure what all the
hubbub was about. He shrugged and wondered if maybe the circus was
coming to town. "Ooh," he said, smiling. Then the smile turned to a
frown, and he huffed. "Shelly will have a fit if I go. She never
lets me have any fun."
While still thinking about
elephants and circus clowns, Josh walked into the office building
to find everyone huddled together, talking about the big news.
Madison was a small place where everyone knew almost everyone else,
so right then, most people were keeping an eye on the television,
waiting for the news reporter's announcement.
"Well, we all showed up so clearly
none of us won." Dan Guntherson laughed.
"Can you imagine?" Joe from
accounting said. "I bet the lucky bastard is already on a jet to
the Bahamas."
"They're probably scared to come
forward," Dan Guntherson said. "You know, all the vultures come out
of the woodwork when they smell money. What do you think,
Josh?"
"Huh?" Josh was daydreaming about
tightrope walkers falling to their deaths.
Dan Guntherson gestured to the
television.
"Oh," Josh said. "The circus.
Yeah, I don't think I'm going to go this year."
Everyone laughed.
"You're right!" Abdul from
marketing slapped Josh on the back. "There's a circus out there,
and none of us
are invited!"
Everyone laughed again.
Dan Guntherson punched Josh in the
shoulder. "Good one!"
"Err, thanks," Josh said, not
understanding what was so funny about a second-rate
circus.
"Seriously though," Dan Guntherson
said, "I can't believe one of our own hit nearly a billion dollars.
God, what I wouldn't do to have a share of that."
"I'd sell out my own grandmother
for only half a mil," Lisa from the mailroom said, nodding her head
with that not bad look on face.
"I'd buy bitcoins!" Ken the intern
shouted. "Lots a lots a lots a bitcoin, yeah!"
"And Christ," Dan Guntherson
continued, "the numbers they played…it's no wonder there was only
one winner. It must have been some kind of joke."
Everyone, except for Josh, burst
out laughing again.
Josh furrowed his brow and looked
at each of his coworkers huddled around the television. The burned
out light bulb in his head momentarily caught a spark. He
whispered,
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