Husky by Justin Sayre Page B

it’s fixed, pet. There’s no need for this,” says Nanny, and she holds me close for a long time, and we’re not saying anything to each other, it’s just her hand on my face, and me leaning in but not too much. The house is quiet and the bed doesn’t even creak under us. We don’tmove and we don’t say a word, until I start to catch my breath.
    After a few minutes I guess the quiet is too much for Nanny, and she says, “You’re tired and you’re hungry. That’s your trouble. It’s that sleeping-in you do. Come down, I’ll cook something up for you.” Nanny smiles and gets up. She doesn’t like tears on anybody.
    â€œOkay,” I say, wiping my face.
    â€œIt will put everything right. It will, it will.” Nanny sighs as she goes downstairs.
    I sit for a minute on my bed and wait. I don’t know for what.

    We get a pizza from Angelo’s and ice cream, Neopolitan, because Nanny likes the mix. We eat the pizza in the front room, and it is weird, but we do really start to talk. Like, I sort of start to tell her things. Real things.
    â€œOh, this is a lovely treat for us, isn’t it, Ducks?” says Nanny, wiping some pizza sauce from her mouth.
    â€œYes,” I answer.
    â€œAnd why not? We deserve it, don’t we? You withschool coming up in how long?”
    â€œLike ten days.”
    â€œIs it? Oh, everything goes so fast, don’t it? Well, wait until you’re older, Ducks, it’ll all fly by. Just fly.” Nanny smiles.
    And I don’t know why, but probably because I’m a big dummy, I ask, “Why can’t it just do that now? Like, I want it to just be over.”
    â€œWhat to be over?” Nanny asks.
    â€œThe whole thing, like, summer and then school and grades and everything. I just want to be done with it.”
    â€œAnd then what will you have to do, I wonder.”
    â€œI could do what I want,” I answer.
    â€œAnd what is that?” Nanny asks me.
    â€œI don’t know.” Because I don’t, honest.
    â€œWell then, make it up. Go on. What would you do if you could do whatever it is you want, Ducks? Whatever. Go on.” Nanny waves her hand to tell me to start. So I do.
    â€œI think I would play music all day. All over the house. Loud, all the time,” I start by saying.
    â€œWell, the neighbors won’t like it, and I’ll be a little . . .that is, if I get to be here with you.” Nanny smiles.
    â€œOf course.” It seems like a silly question, but it makes me think,
Of course I would want her here
. How could I think of a place without her? My yelling Irish grandmother. There’s not an opera I could play at the loudest volume in the world that would make the world as loud a place as she does. And it makes me sort of sad to think that she doesn’t know if she would be there.
    â€œWell, thank you.” Nanny smiles. “So go on. Loud Oohs and Aahs. No neighbors and me.”
    â€œAnd Mom,” I say.
    â€œOh, good. Who else?” Nanny says.
    â€œAnd Ellen and Hannah.”
    â€œWhich one is that?” Nanny asks.
    â€œEllen’s little sister.”
    â€œOh, the little one with the curls, oh, she is nice, I’m glad you’re keeping her.” Nanny smiles.
    â€œAnd Sophie,” I say.
    â€œI was waiting for her. And what would you do?”
    â€œI would . . . just be happy, I guess.”
    â€œWell, half them things you got right here, right now.All of them in fact, so what’s the trouble?”
    I know, but I say I don’t.
    â€œSee, Ducks, you want everything to be perfect, when there’s no such thing, no such thing in this world. There are bits of it, sure, but not a whole perfect thing.”
    I don’t see anything even close to perfect right now.
    â€œIt’s like the Neopolitan here. The strawberry they give you is not great. The chocolate’s a little too dark