Depository, the Hutchings government had gravitas.
In Bradfordsville, ProvGov representatives delivered posters to be placed prominently at the post office, town hall, Bradfordsville Performing Arts Center, and at the old Bradfordsville School building. The latter had in recent years been turned into a senior center and designated storm shelter. The Provisional Government’s new poster read:
B-A-N-N-E-D
Effective Upon Posting in a prominent place in each County and in effect until further notice, the following items are hereby banned from private possession by the recently enacted Amplified United Nations Small Arms and Light Weapons (SALW) Normalization Accord:
1. All fully automatic or short-barreled rifles and shotguns (regardless of prior registration under the National Firearms Act of 1934).
2. Any rifle over thirty (.30) caliber, any shotgun or weapon of any description over twelve (12) gauge in diameter.
3. All semiautomatic rifles and shotguns, all rifles and shotguns capable of accepting a detachable magazine.
4. Any detachable magazines, regardless of capacity.
5. Any weapon with a fixed magazine that has a capacity of more than four (4) cartridges (or shells).
6. All grenades and grenade launchers, all explosives, detonating cord, and blasting caps (regardless of prior registration under the Gun Control Act of 1968 or state or local blasting permits).
7. All explosives precursor chemicals.
8. All firearms regardless of type that are chambered for military cartridges (including but not limited to 7.62mm NATO, 5.56mm NATO, .45 ACP, and 9mm Parabellum).
9. All silencers (regardless of prior registration under the National Firearms Act of 1934).
10. All night vision equipment, including, but not limited to, infrared, light amplification, or thermal, all telescopic sights, and all laser aiming devices.
11. All handguns —regardless of type or caliber.
12. Other distinctly military equipment, including, but not limited to, armored vehicles, bayonets, gas masks, helmets, and bulletproof vests.
13. Encryption software or devices.
14. All radio transmitters (other than baby monitors, cordless phones, short-range wireless devices, or cell phones).
15. Full metal jacket, tracer, incendiary, and armor-piercing ammunition.
16. All ammunition in military calibers.
17. Irritant or lethal (toxin) chemical agents, including, but not limited to, CS and CN tear gas, and OC pepper spray.
18. All military-type pyrotechnics and flare launchers.
Exceptions only for properly trained and sworn police and the military forces of the UN and the Sole and Legitimate Provisional Government of the United States of America and Possessions.
Any firearm or other item not meeting the new criteria and all other contraband listed herein must be turned in within the ten (10) day amnesty period after the UN Regional Administrator or sub-administrator, or their delegates, arrive on site. Alternatively, if Federal or UN troops arrive within any state to pacify it, a thirty (30) day amnesty period will begin the day the first forces cross the state boundary. All other post-1898 production firearms of any description, air rifles, archery equipment, and edged weapons over six inches long must be registered during the same period.
Anyone found with an unregistered weapon, or any weapon, accessory, or ammunition that has been declared contraband after the amnesty period ends, will be summarily executed.
As ordered under my hand, Maynard Hutchings, President (pro tem) of the Sole and Legitimate Provisional Government of the United States of America and Possessions.
The reaction to the decrees was almost uniformly negative. One of Sheila’s general store customers summed it up best when he quipped: “Well, at least we can still use our fists and harsh language to stop crime. That is, until they ban harsh language, too.”
10
Courting and Quirting
“If an American is to amount to anything he must rely upon
In Bradfordsville, ProvGov representatives delivered posters to be placed prominently at the post office, town hall, Bradfordsville Performing Arts Center, and at the old Bradfordsville School building. The latter had in recent years been turned into a senior center and designated storm shelter. The Provisional Government’s new poster read:
B-A-N-N-E-D
Effective Upon Posting in a prominent place in each County and in effect until further notice, the following items are hereby banned from private possession by the recently enacted Amplified United Nations Small Arms and Light Weapons (SALW) Normalization Accord:
1. All fully automatic or short-barreled rifles and shotguns (regardless of prior registration under the National Firearms Act of 1934).
2. Any rifle over thirty (.30) caliber, any shotgun or weapon of any description over twelve (12) gauge in diameter.
3. All semiautomatic rifles and shotguns, all rifles and shotguns capable of accepting a detachable magazine.
4. Any detachable magazines, regardless of capacity.
5. Any weapon with a fixed magazine that has a capacity of more than four (4) cartridges (or shells).
6. All grenades and grenade launchers, all explosives, detonating cord, and blasting caps (regardless of prior registration under the Gun Control Act of 1968 or state or local blasting permits).
7. All explosives precursor chemicals.
8. All firearms regardless of type that are chambered for military cartridges (including but not limited to 7.62mm NATO, 5.56mm NATO, .45 ACP, and 9mm Parabellum).
9. All silencers (regardless of prior registration under the National Firearms Act of 1934).
10. All night vision equipment, including, but not limited to, infrared, light amplification, or thermal, all telescopic sights, and all laser aiming devices.
11. All handguns —regardless of type or caliber.
12. Other distinctly military equipment, including, but not limited to, armored vehicles, bayonets, gas masks, helmets, and bulletproof vests.
13. Encryption software or devices.
14. All radio transmitters (other than baby monitors, cordless phones, short-range wireless devices, or cell phones).
15. Full metal jacket, tracer, incendiary, and armor-piercing ammunition.
16. All ammunition in military calibers.
17. Irritant or lethal (toxin) chemical agents, including, but not limited to, CS and CN tear gas, and OC pepper spray.
18. All military-type pyrotechnics and flare launchers.
Exceptions only for properly trained and sworn police and the military forces of the UN and the Sole and Legitimate Provisional Government of the United States of America and Possessions.
Any firearm or other item not meeting the new criteria and all other contraband listed herein must be turned in within the ten (10) day amnesty period after the UN Regional Administrator or sub-administrator, or their delegates, arrive on site. Alternatively, if Federal or UN troops arrive within any state to pacify it, a thirty (30) day amnesty period will begin the day the first forces cross the state boundary. All other post-1898 production firearms of any description, air rifles, archery equipment, and edged weapons over six inches long must be registered during the same period.
Anyone found with an unregistered weapon, or any weapon, accessory, or ammunition that has been declared contraband after the amnesty period ends, will be summarily executed.
As ordered under my hand, Maynard Hutchings, President (pro tem) of the Sole and Legitimate Provisional Government of the United States of America and Possessions.
The reaction to the decrees was almost uniformly negative. One of Sheila’s general store customers summed it up best when he quipped: “Well, at least we can still use our fists and harsh language to stop crime. That is, until they ban harsh language, too.”
10
Courting and Quirting
“If an American is to amount to anything he must rely upon
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