gone through the pronoun game this afternoon. It was not my cat, it was me. My other legs needed to be stretched out, needed to be set free to run and streak through the night air.
“But if you do grab a little snack, please don’t leave it on my doormat,” Iris joked.
And I laughed. It was what I needed right now to calm the jitters in my chest.
“And tomorrow we’ll work on shielding.”
“Going a little medieval tomorrow, are we?”
Iris pursed her lips. “Shielding is the opposite of brushing. It’s putting up borders to protect yourself”
“Why?”
“People are going to begin to notice you walking into a room. And not the kind of noticing you want. Imagine if I just walked around like that, power out all willy-nilly, knocking people out of chairs all the time. So we’ll work on it tomorrow, on how to put up borders to keep yourself hidden. Should protect you until we know what’s happening and keep Haverty from finding you.”
“Wait,” I asked. “What about Chaz? Does he have borders up?”
Iris flashed quick smile. “Honey, that boy was born with his borders cemented in place. Never seen such impenetrable stuff. Known him for over ten years and I couldn’t tell you what his insides are like.”
She turned back to the fields, closing her eyes for a moment, the wind softly swishing the white wisps around her face. I was still looking at her when she opened her eyes.
“I’ll work with you tomorrow,” she repeated. “Otherwise, I have a feeling you could get yourself into trouble.”
“Me? Trouble?”
Iris just raised an eyebrow.
“I might be able to stay out of trouble if I understood how it works,” I said. The feline stretched in my chest, rolled around. The high moon called to her and she wanted to be free. “Still dealing with the whole magic is real thing.”
Iris turned her golden eyes to me. She’d told me that she rarely shifted anymore, that the change was too hard on her old body, but she could still feel the pull of the moon. Tonight, you could see the pull of the moon in her eyes. “You a religious girl?”
“Used to be.”
Iris looked long out across her land. “Well, I’m not an expert at the metaphysical stuff. I’m better at showing you how it works than telling you why is works. Our people sprung forth from the Earth and when they did, they kept the magic of their creation with them, practiced it and worshiped it. You’ll feel it when you’re older, how much potential everything has. The difference between us and regular folks is that we can tap into that potential and use it.”
“This is going to sound contrite, but what else is out there?”
“Didn’t Chaz give you the book?”
“Werewolves and demons and vampires, oh my.”
“If you can think it, it was real at some point.” Iris slowly looked over at me and raised her silver eyebrow above her sharp blue eyes. “You’re stalling, aren’t you?”
My chin hit my chest. “Maybe.”
Iris smiled and put her hand on my arm. “It’s time.”
I took in a deep breath and slowly moved through the steps. We’d practiced all afternoon. Invoking the shift, rather than having it take me like it had the night before. Freaked me the hell out when I first felt it, what Iris told me was where my panther power slept. I think there may have been some unnecessary jumping and pacing. And a lot of deep breaths so I wouldn’t pass out.
But tonight, I looked into Iris’s eyes and everything told me that I could do this. A truth hummed through me: I was made to do this.
I looked out into the night and took the first of many calming breaths, hoping this wasn’t anything like poking a bear in a zoo.
I closed my eyes. I could smell the night, the wind, the trees, the fields, smell Iris’s rosy perfume. The crickets chirped on the warm October night. Nature was alive and well under the full moon.
I listened to my heart. Full of stories and wonder and still so very fragile.
I listened to my other heart.
“But if you do grab a little snack, please don’t leave it on my doormat,” Iris joked.
And I laughed. It was what I needed right now to calm the jitters in my chest.
“And tomorrow we’ll work on shielding.”
“Going a little medieval tomorrow, are we?”
Iris pursed her lips. “Shielding is the opposite of brushing. It’s putting up borders to protect yourself”
“Why?”
“People are going to begin to notice you walking into a room. And not the kind of noticing you want. Imagine if I just walked around like that, power out all willy-nilly, knocking people out of chairs all the time. So we’ll work on it tomorrow, on how to put up borders to keep yourself hidden. Should protect you until we know what’s happening and keep Haverty from finding you.”
“Wait,” I asked. “What about Chaz? Does he have borders up?”
Iris flashed quick smile. “Honey, that boy was born with his borders cemented in place. Never seen such impenetrable stuff. Known him for over ten years and I couldn’t tell you what his insides are like.”
She turned back to the fields, closing her eyes for a moment, the wind softly swishing the white wisps around her face. I was still looking at her when she opened her eyes.
“I’ll work with you tomorrow,” she repeated. “Otherwise, I have a feeling you could get yourself into trouble.”
“Me? Trouble?”
Iris just raised an eyebrow.
“I might be able to stay out of trouble if I understood how it works,” I said. The feline stretched in my chest, rolled around. The high moon called to her and she wanted to be free. “Still dealing with the whole magic is real thing.”
Iris turned her golden eyes to me. She’d told me that she rarely shifted anymore, that the change was too hard on her old body, but she could still feel the pull of the moon. Tonight, you could see the pull of the moon in her eyes. “You a religious girl?”
“Used to be.”
Iris looked long out across her land. “Well, I’m not an expert at the metaphysical stuff. I’m better at showing you how it works than telling you why is works. Our people sprung forth from the Earth and when they did, they kept the magic of their creation with them, practiced it and worshiped it. You’ll feel it when you’re older, how much potential everything has. The difference between us and regular folks is that we can tap into that potential and use it.”
“This is going to sound contrite, but what else is out there?”
“Didn’t Chaz give you the book?”
“Werewolves and demons and vampires, oh my.”
“If you can think it, it was real at some point.” Iris slowly looked over at me and raised her silver eyebrow above her sharp blue eyes. “You’re stalling, aren’t you?”
My chin hit my chest. “Maybe.”
Iris smiled and put her hand on my arm. “It’s time.”
I took in a deep breath and slowly moved through the steps. We’d practiced all afternoon. Invoking the shift, rather than having it take me like it had the night before. Freaked me the hell out when I first felt it, what Iris told me was where my panther power slept. I think there may have been some unnecessary jumping and pacing. And a lot of deep breaths so I wouldn’t pass out.
But tonight, I looked into Iris’s eyes and everything told me that I could do this. A truth hummed through me: I was made to do this.
I looked out into the night and took the first of many calming breaths, hoping this wasn’t anything like poking a bear in a zoo.
I closed my eyes. I could smell the night, the wind, the trees, the fields, smell Iris’s rosy perfume. The crickets chirped on the warm October night. Nature was alive and well under the full moon.
I listened to my heart. Full of stories and wonder and still so very fragile.
I listened to my other heart.
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