long neck? You didn’t keep them there long enough!”
Ptolemy paused to think. “No! She was poisoned! They assured me she was dead... dead and then left so the jackals would tear her to bits!”
Mark rolled his eyes. “She took an antidote then in preparation and deceived you.”
“That’s not possible! It was somebody else you saw! My terrible sister is dead! She has to be! I want her dead!”
Mark slapped the crown of gold leaves off the young king. “I know a Cleopatra when I see one and this is certainly your sister.”
“It wasn’t her!”
Mark answered, “Cleopatra is unforgettable.”
“She’s a monster!”
“She’s lovely. And alive.”
Ptolemy cried, “No! Then you’ve been speaking to a ghost!”
Mark paused to wonder how much a ghost could hoodwink by the light of day.
A servant rushed in holding a box. Ptolemy yelled at the servant, “Open it! Open it now for all Rome to see!”
The servant tripped on his own sandals and the box fell to the marble floor and broke open. A man’s head rolled out.
Mark yelled when he saw the face. “Pompey!”
Ptolemy explained, “Pompey had said there would be a great surprise to whomever opened his pewter puzzle box. He said it contained a surprise for the Romans who would be so bold to open it. I don’t know about such a box so I used this one. Surprise !”
Mark gasped. “It was a curse! It was a curse!”
Ptolemy was confused by Mark’s reaction. “I couldn’t even find a puzzle box to fit his head. This is just a box. I wanted Rome to have a nice boxed surprise anyway…”
“Pompey the Great!”
Ptolemy pointed at it. “He’s not great. He’s your sworn enemy!”
Mark fell to his knees before the head of Pompey. “No! This is a great insult against the gods! All the gods of Rome will cry out in horror!”
Ptolemy yelled, “He was Caesar’s enemy!”
“Oooh what an insult. Pompey the Great came to Egypt seeking protection. You only pretended to provide sanctuary but then did this in hopes of winning favor with Caesar. Your hospitality is terrible! Oh what a great sin. His vengeance will sink many ships! His vengeance will be as powerful as a volcano! So great is this sin!”
“Caesar will be pleased. Admit it.”
Mark let out a moan. “Where is the rest of his body?”
The young pharaoh stammered incoherently.
Mark said, “Find it! I’m disgusted. He was a great man. He was a great foe. He was a foe whose death shall be shouted from the rooftops. Pompey the Great is dead, the greatest warrior for the Republic of Rome for as long as it stood! He was a noble Roman citizen and he will not be treated this way by the savage pagans of this backward land. This land is not Rome’s court of law. Only Rome could judge him.” Mark grabbed Ptolemy by his purple robe, pulled him off the throne, pulled him out of his robe and threw him to the floor. “I order that Pompey’s body be found and given a proper Roman funeral! And may everyone in Alexandria cry in mourning! Let them all give public sacrifices to the gods to pray forgiveness for this bad treatment of a Roman citizen! Hospitality has been insulted! Rome has been insulted! Let everyone cry that Caesar’s greatest enemy is dead!”
Ptolemy shook. “Forgive me, I thought it’d give Caesar pleasure. I only meant to please Rome. I only want to please Rome!”
“You’re too young to please anyone. In ten years I’ll see if you’re ready to please Rome. Until then you’ll go to the border of Persia, with Rome’s army, and fight the Persians. You’ll learn to live and fight as a Roman!”
Ptolemy got back up off the floor. “But… but… I’ll certainly be abused, disparaged and even put where the most harm may befall me if I’m in the midst of the soldiers of Rome.”
Mark threw the robe back into his face. “An occupational hazard when you are king.”
Ptolemy quickly put his robe back on. “I will be abused! I’ll be raped! I’ll be put on the
Ptolemy paused to think. “No! She was poisoned! They assured me she was dead... dead and then left so the jackals would tear her to bits!”
Mark rolled his eyes. “She took an antidote then in preparation and deceived you.”
“That’s not possible! It was somebody else you saw! My terrible sister is dead! She has to be! I want her dead!”
Mark slapped the crown of gold leaves off the young king. “I know a Cleopatra when I see one and this is certainly your sister.”
“It wasn’t her!”
Mark answered, “Cleopatra is unforgettable.”
“She’s a monster!”
“She’s lovely. And alive.”
Ptolemy cried, “No! Then you’ve been speaking to a ghost!”
Mark paused to wonder how much a ghost could hoodwink by the light of day.
A servant rushed in holding a box. Ptolemy yelled at the servant, “Open it! Open it now for all Rome to see!”
The servant tripped on his own sandals and the box fell to the marble floor and broke open. A man’s head rolled out.
Mark yelled when he saw the face. “Pompey!”
Ptolemy explained, “Pompey had said there would be a great surprise to whomever opened his pewter puzzle box. He said it contained a surprise for the Romans who would be so bold to open it. I don’t know about such a box so I used this one. Surprise !”
Mark gasped. “It was a curse! It was a curse!”
Ptolemy was confused by Mark’s reaction. “I couldn’t even find a puzzle box to fit his head. This is just a box. I wanted Rome to have a nice boxed surprise anyway…”
“Pompey the Great!”
Ptolemy pointed at it. “He’s not great. He’s your sworn enemy!”
Mark fell to his knees before the head of Pompey. “No! This is a great insult against the gods! All the gods of Rome will cry out in horror!”
Ptolemy yelled, “He was Caesar’s enemy!”
“Oooh what an insult. Pompey the Great came to Egypt seeking protection. You only pretended to provide sanctuary but then did this in hopes of winning favor with Caesar. Your hospitality is terrible! Oh what a great sin. His vengeance will sink many ships! His vengeance will be as powerful as a volcano! So great is this sin!”
“Caesar will be pleased. Admit it.”
Mark let out a moan. “Where is the rest of his body?”
The young pharaoh stammered incoherently.
Mark said, “Find it! I’m disgusted. He was a great man. He was a great foe. He was a foe whose death shall be shouted from the rooftops. Pompey the Great is dead, the greatest warrior for the Republic of Rome for as long as it stood! He was a noble Roman citizen and he will not be treated this way by the savage pagans of this backward land. This land is not Rome’s court of law. Only Rome could judge him.” Mark grabbed Ptolemy by his purple robe, pulled him off the throne, pulled him out of his robe and threw him to the floor. “I order that Pompey’s body be found and given a proper Roman funeral! And may everyone in Alexandria cry in mourning! Let them all give public sacrifices to the gods to pray forgiveness for this bad treatment of a Roman citizen! Hospitality has been insulted! Rome has been insulted! Let everyone cry that Caesar’s greatest enemy is dead!”
Ptolemy shook. “Forgive me, I thought it’d give Caesar pleasure. I only meant to please Rome. I only want to please Rome!”
“You’re too young to please anyone. In ten years I’ll see if you’re ready to please Rome. Until then you’ll go to the border of Persia, with Rome’s army, and fight the Persians. You’ll learn to live and fight as a Roman!”
Ptolemy got back up off the floor. “But… but… I’ll certainly be abused, disparaged and even put where the most harm may befall me if I’m in the midst of the soldiers of Rome.”
Mark threw the robe back into his face. “An occupational hazard when you are king.”
Ptolemy quickly put his robe back on. “I will be abused! I’ll be raped! I’ll be put on the
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