Becoming Sister Wives: The Story of an Unconventional Marriage by Kody Brown, Meri Brown, Janelle Brown, Christine Brown, Robyn Brown
Tags: General, Family & Relationships, Personal Memoirs, Biography & Autobiography, Biography, Non-Fiction, Alternative Family
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was still shaken.
The next day, Robyn and I drove back out to Thanksgiving Point. As we sat there talking, I was overcome with what I believed was God’s spirit. Before I knew what I was doing, I took her hand and asked her to marry me.
When Christine and I got engaged, she told me she wouldn’t kiss me until we were at the altar. After we were married, she realized she had made a mistake and made me promise that if I married again, I’d kiss my next wife before we said our vows. So I took Robyn’s face in my hands and kissed her. Robyn leaped out of the car and began to dance around. She was so happy and joyful. I got out of the car, and she jumped into my arms. This happened on September 26. We wouldn’t get married for six months. Our lives were in upheaval. I couldn’t support Robyn yet. I couldn’t even move her to our town—but I knew God would help me do what it would take to bring our families together when the time was right.
Chapter Five
MERI
Like many women who choose plural marriage, I idealized the nature of sister wives. I was eager for my first sister wife to be my friend in addition to being married to my husband. I never wanted to be in a situation with a sister wife who didn’t want to associate with the rest of the family. As I imagined it, it would be the most natural thing in the world for my sister wives and me to form instantaneous friendships.
Paradoxically, I am reserved but at times can be opinionated, which makes me cautious about quickly forging close relationships with women. In forming friendships and relationships, I need to feel safety and trust with the other person before I feel I can open up to a deep relationship. But when I do, I value them deeply and expect these friendships to last. When Kody and I entered into our first courtship with a young woman we’d been introduced to at a church gathering, I was excited. She and I became close friends right away. This was unusual for me and I immediately took it as a sign that Kody and I were destined to marry her. This girl and I loved hanging out together and spent lots of time on our own without Kody. As I saw it, we were on our way to achieving the sister wife ideal I’d always imagined.
Though sometimes I got jealous of the afternoons she and Kody went off on their own to develop their relationship, I did my best to deal with those feelings maturely. I felt confident that the three of us had a wonderful future together and I was certain that while she would be a great wife to Kody, she would remain one of my best friends.
But things didn’t work out. I was devastated when the courtship soured and she left. Back then we were all so young—she was only eighteen, and Kody and I were in our first year of marriage—so we may have mistaken a crush for love. Nevertheless, I felt personally betrayed. I had lost one of my closest friends, a woman I imagined would have been a perfect sister wife.
We managed to put our failed courtship behind us. Kody and I were still the fun-loving, goofy, and wildly romantic couple we’d always been, but we felt that adding a wife to our family was something we needed to accomplish sooner rather than later in order to make good on our commitment to the principle of plural marriage. This was a promise we made to each other when we married—as much as we loved each other and had a wonderful, stable relationship, we knew that plural marriage was our destiny.
I’m not sure when it became apparent to me that Janelle wanted to join our family. Of course, since she had once been married to my brother, I had known her for several years. We had a cordial relationship. Even after her divorce, I thought of her as a sister-in-law, and it never occurred to me that she would one day be a sister wife.
If Kody had feelings about Janelle that were anything other than platonic, he hadn’t discussed them with me. I knew that he valued her intellect and her work ethic, and he had a deep respect for the way
The next day, Robyn and I drove back out to Thanksgiving Point. As we sat there talking, I was overcome with what I believed was God’s spirit. Before I knew what I was doing, I took her hand and asked her to marry me.
When Christine and I got engaged, she told me she wouldn’t kiss me until we were at the altar. After we were married, she realized she had made a mistake and made me promise that if I married again, I’d kiss my next wife before we said our vows. So I took Robyn’s face in my hands and kissed her. Robyn leaped out of the car and began to dance around. She was so happy and joyful. I got out of the car, and she jumped into my arms. This happened on September 26. We wouldn’t get married for six months. Our lives were in upheaval. I couldn’t support Robyn yet. I couldn’t even move her to our town—but I knew God would help me do what it would take to bring our families together when the time was right.
Chapter Five
MERI
Like many women who choose plural marriage, I idealized the nature of sister wives. I was eager for my first sister wife to be my friend in addition to being married to my husband. I never wanted to be in a situation with a sister wife who didn’t want to associate with the rest of the family. As I imagined it, it would be the most natural thing in the world for my sister wives and me to form instantaneous friendships.
Paradoxically, I am reserved but at times can be opinionated, which makes me cautious about quickly forging close relationships with women. In forming friendships and relationships, I need to feel safety and trust with the other person before I feel I can open up to a deep relationship. But when I do, I value them deeply and expect these friendships to last. When Kody and I entered into our first courtship with a young woman we’d been introduced to at a church gathering, I was excited. She and I became close friends right away. This was unusual for me and I immediately took it as a sign that Kody and I were destined to marry her. This girl and I loved hanging out together and spent lots of time on our own without Kody. As I saw it, we were on our way to achieving the sister wife ideal I’d always imagined.
Though sometimes I got jealous of the afternoons she and Kody went off on their own to develop their relationship, I did my best to deal with those feelings maturely. I felt confident that the three of us had a wonderful future together and I was certain that while she would be a great wife to Kody, she would remain one of my best friends.
But things didn’t work out. I was devastated when the courtship soured and she left. Back then we were all so young—she was only eighteen, and Kody and I were in our first year of marriage—so we may have mistaken a crush for love. Nevertheless, I felt personally betrayed. I had lost one of my closest friends, a woman I imagined would have been a perfect sister wife.
We managed to put our failed courtship behind us. Kody and I were still the fun-loving, goofy, and wildly romantic couple we’d always been, but we felt that adding a wife to our family was something we needed to accomplish sooner rather than later in order to make good on our commitment to the principle of plural marriage. This was a promise we made to each other when we married—as much as we loved each other and had a wonderful, stable relationship, we knew that plural marriage was our destiny.
I’m not sure when it became apparent to me that Janelle wanted to join our family. Of course, since she had once been married to my brother, I had known her for several years. We had a cordial relationship. Even after her divorce, I thought of her as a sister-in-law, and it never occurred to me that she would one day be a sister wife.
If Kody had feelings about Janelle that were anything other than platonic, he hadn’t discussed them with me. I knew that he valued her intellect and her work ethic, and he had a deep respect for the way
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