Anterograde by Kallysten Page B

sleep.’”
    “No.
I told myself it was worth it if I got to remember a little longer.”
    Eli
sighed. “Remember what, Ca l den?”
    “You.
Remember that you live here now. That you… you take care of me. Even when I’m
an idiot.”
    The
words were unexpected. Ca l den resented being ‘taken care of’ with a passion. He
allowed it because he understood it was necessary, but he was vocal in
expressing how much he hated it. And now this…
    “You
are an idiot,” Eli said gruffly as he walked to the door. “Sleep now.”
    “Could
you…”
    Eli
paused and looked back. Ca l den was little more than a shadow buried under the
sheets at the far end of the bed.
    “Could
I what?”
    “Stay?
It’s easier to ignore her if you’re here.”
    After
a second of hesitation, Eli walked back over, toeing his shoes off and sitting
on the bed with his back to the headboard.
    “I’ll
stay until you’re asleep,” he said quietly. “And then you’ll have a nice, long
rest. And when you wake up, I am going to yell at you until I lose my voice,
and it’s going to feel so, so very good.”
    Ca l den shifted
under the sheets, turning to face Eli.
    “You’re
going to yell at me for something I won’t remember?”
    “I
most certainly will. And once you’re sufficiently chastised, I’ll make you
write about it in your diary so you won’t play that stupid game ever again.”
    “Why
not do it now?” Ca l den asked. “Get it over with.”
    “Because
I don’t want to have to compete with a ghost for your attention. And because you should be
sleeping already. Now shut up and close your eyes.”
    Ca l den did close
his eyes, but after only seconds he was speaking again.
    “Threaten
to leave,” he murmured. “If you want me to take you seriously, just say you’ll
leave if I try this again.”
    Eli
opened his mouth and closed it again without uttering a word. Was this it? The
ultimate weapon against Ca l den’s stubbornness? A threat to leave him to his fate?
Eli could never do it, but could he lie convincingly about it?
    “You’d
know it wasn’t true,” he said, trying to turn the words into a joke.
    “No,
I wouldn’t know,” Ca l den said, still as quietly. “It’d be the most
terrifying threat.”
    Eli
didn’t have an answer. But he did know that he wouldn’t hang this particular
threat over Ca l den. Not for this, and not for anything. He wasn’t that cruel .
    It
was only moments before Ca l den’s breathing evened out in sleep.
    It
was hours before Eli stood and left the room.
     
    ( next chronological chapter )

 
    September 27 th
     
     
    It
comes out of nowhere.
    One
second, Calden is rolling his eyes while Petters
is going over the assignments for the afternoon; he’s given Calden a broken arm
that needs a metal rod inserted. It’s a
waste of Calden’s time and skills, and everyone in the room knows it. Maybe
he’ll grab one of the interns and supervise while he or she performs the
surgery.
    The
next moment, he’s looking at Eli and it strikes him, like lightning out of a clear
blue sky. He never cared about kissing, but now he really wants to. Even
better: he’s allowed. Isn’t he?
    It’s
still terribly new. Only a little more than a day for Calden, less than a month
for Eli. But it’s there, in the way Eli looks at Calden, in that little glint
in his eyes that’s all at once possessive and affectionate—that glint that says
he knows Calden is annoyed and planning a token rebellion against Petters.
    Calden
doesn’t care where he is or why. He doesn’t care that there are people around
them . All that stops him is that he never asked who, if anyone, knows about their
relationship, and even that is a flimsy excuse.
    While
Petters keeps rambling about supplies and proper procedures, Calden pays him no
attention whatsoever and shifts closer to Eli. They’re both standing against
the wall at the back of the room, and waiting is torture. At long last, Petters
ends the meeting, and people