“Fuck you, Arnauld.”
I smile, hoping she really means that. She turns and looks at me. “Have I ever told you that his real name isn’t Arnauld…it’s Arnold?”
“Arnold?” I choke out, almost spitting up my drink.
“Yeah, isn’t that rich? I discovered his high school yearbook once and found his picture. I called him Arnold once when we were having a fight and he stormed off like a big baby.” She grins.
A second later her phone prompts again.
She reads his response aloud. “
What are you doing?”
Her fingers fly over the text keys to respond. I imagine I can see the steam rising out of her ears like what happens to Yosemite Sam when Bugs Bunny really pisses him off.
“
I thought you knew. I’m bending over. If he fucks me again I really think I’ll be able to close this deal.”
Why did she have to read that to me? It makes me sick and yet arouses me at the same time. I’m in pain, and I down the rest of my drink. The room tilts as a result.
She reads his response with a mock angry face. “
That isn’t funny, Brooke.
Oh, hairy back is getting angry,” she slurs.
“
No, it really isn’t,”
she types while reading aloud, then shuts off her phone. She waves for the waitress, who comes over warily. “Another round, please.”
You go, Buttercup!
I sit quietly wondering what to say. Finally I offer my best idea. “You want me to beat him up? My brother, who’s looks like the Incredible Hulk, would help and it wouldn’t be pretty.”
“You’re so thoughtful, and for the record that’s really hot.”
“I mean it,” I say. I want her to understand I mean business.
“I know you do and that means a lot to me. Still I have to say no, but thanks. Look, I’m a little loaded and enjoying venting, but for all my bitching I know he didn’t really want me to sleep with him. Charm him, yes, but not fuck him.”
“It’s still disgusting,” I insist.
“Yes, it is.” Her head drops and we sit silently for a minute before she looks back up. “Look, enough about me. What happened to you today?”
I realize that I shouldn’t tell this story drunk, but I’m overwhelmed with the urge to let out this gnawing frustration.
“Oh, I’m having envy issues. I’m so pathetic.”
“What happened?” she asks sympathetically.
“I had lunch with my brother today. After lunch we stopped at the comic book store, and I introduced him to my friend, Billie. She runs the place and is exceptionally good looking. And of course they had an instant love connection.”
“But I thought you liked Dani, why does him liking Billie, and her liking him, bother you?”
“I don’t know, probably because they’re most likely in bed right now. Women always fall all over Curtis and drag him to bed. He has amazing sex all the time, and I don’t. Things never work out that way for me.”
“Really?” she asks, looking disappointed for me.
“Sorry,” I groan, letting my face falls into my open hands.
“You don’t? What do you mean you don’t? You make it sound like you’ve never had great sex or something.”
I look up at her and blanch as I watch the blood also drain from her face.
“Oh my God,” she chants. “You’re not a virgin, please tell me that you’re not a virgin.”
I’m already the worst kind of loser and I don’t even care how it looks anymore. Defeated I lean into my drink and take another long sip. “Well, technically I may as well be for the lack of fun I’ve had.”
“I don’t understand. Is something wrong with you physically? I would imagine not since you felt more than healthy when you were holding me last night.”
I’m horrified and dumbstruck. I can’t even look her in the eye. “I’m not sure I’m comfortable talking to you about sex, or I mean my lack of hot sex, Brooke. It’s so humiliating.”
“First of all Nathan, I love to talk about sex. It’s my favorite subject. So please don’t be shy.”
She scoots over closer to me and reaches over,
I smile, hoping she really means that. She turns and looks at me. “Have I ever told you that his real name isn’t Arnauld…it’s Arnold?”
“Arnold?” I choke out, almost spitting up my drink.
“Yeah, isn’t that rich? I discovered his high school yearbook once and found his picture. I called him Arnold once when we were having a fight and he stormed off like a big baby.” She grins.
A second later her phone prompts again.
She reads his response aloud. “
What are you doing?”
Her fingers fly over the text keys to respond. I imagine I can see the steam rising out of her ears like what happens to Yosemite Sam when Bugs Bunny really pisses him off.
“
I thought you knew. I’m bending over. If he fucks me again I really think I’ll be able to close this deal.”
Why did she have to read that to me? It makes me sick and yet arouses me at the same time. I’m in pain, and I down the rest of my drink. The room tilts as a result.
She reads his response with a mock angry face. “
That isn’t funny, Brooke.
Oh, hairy back is getting angry,” she slurs.
“
No, it really isn’t,”
she types while reading aloud, then shuts off her phone. She waves for the waitress, who comes over warily. “Another round, please.”
You go, Buttercup!
I sit quietly wondering what to say. Finally I offer my best idea. “You want me to beat him up? My brother, who’s looks like the Incredible Hulk, would help and it wouldn’t be pretty.”
“You’re so thoughtful, and for the record that’s really hot.”
“I mean it,” I say. I want her to understand I mean business.
“I know you do and that means a lot to me. Still I have to say no, but thanks. Look, I’m a little loaded and enjoying venting, but for all my bitching I know he didn’t really want me to sleep with him. Charm him, yes, but not fuck him.”
“It’s still disgusting,” I insist.
“Yes, it is.” Her head drops and we sit silently for a minute before she looks back up. “Look, enough about me. What happened to you today?”
I realize that I shouldn’t tell this story drunk, but I’m overwhelmed with the urge to let out this gnawing frustration.
“Oh, I’m having envy issues. I’m so pathetic.”
“What happened?” she asks sympathetically.
“I had lunch with my brother today. After lunch we stopped at the comic book store, and I introduced him to my friend, Billie. She runs the place and is exceptionally good looking. And of course they had an instant love connection.”
“But I thought you liked Dani, why does him liking Billie, and her liking him, bother you?”
“I don’t know, probably because they’re most likely in bed right now. Women always fall all over Curtis and drag him to bed. He has amazing sex all the time, and I don’t. Things never work out that way for me.”
“Really?” she asks, looking disappointed for me.
“Sorry,” I groan, letting my face falls into my open hands.
“You don’t? What do you mean you don’t? You make it sound like you’ve never had great sex or something.”
I look up at her and blanch as I watch the blood also drain from her face.
“Oh my God,” she chants. “You’re not a virgin, please tell me that you’re not a virgin.”
I’m already the worst kind of loser and I don’t even care how it looks anymore. Defeated I lean into my drink and take another long sip. “Well, technically I may as well be for the lack of fun I’ve had.”
“I don’t understand. Is something wrong with you physically? I would imagine not since you felt more than healthy when you were holding me last night.”
I’m horrified and dumbstruck. I can’t even look her in the eye. “I’m not sure I’m comfortable talking to you about sex, or I mean my lack of hot sex, Brooke. It’s so humiliating.”
“First of all Nathan, I love to talk about sex. It’s my favorite subject. So please don’t be shy.”
She scoots over closer to me and reaches over,
Similar Books
