away. It’s
like he can’t see the connection.”
“He probably can’t—or can’t allow himself
to. I’ve let him down, I know that.
I could have been closer, tried harder, but I let him move away, and then I
settled overseas, never thinking that I could have made a difference, when I
could and should have. I don’t know how many years I have left to me, but I'm
going to change things now. I'm going to live in this city, be close to him,
even if he pushes me away. I won’t let him be alone when I can be there.”
Julian squeezed Leo’s fingers. “He doesn’t
deserve you.”
“Yes, he does. And like him, I have a
weakness for wounded helpless things, even when I'm pretty helpless myself,” he
said with a wry smile.
“Will you be able to still stay with me?
Can you walk okay?”
“I'm fine. They think the symptoms will
disappear almost completely, but they’ve put me on some blood thinning
medication. I just need to take things easy, but I always do.”
“Coming up here three times a day and
buying an apartment isn’t taking it easy.”
“My boy, you’ve been doing most of the
work. But for a little while, I’ll have to ask you to do some more—do you
mind?”
“Of course not! What do you need?”
“I’d like you to take over visiting
Zachary, starting now.”
Julian took a deep breath, trying to stay
calm. “I can’t—he told me to get out. He’ll just call the nurses and make them
throw me out.”
Leo smiled and tightened his fingers a
little in Julian’s grip. “Oh, I think maybe he won’t. Will you try, for me?”
“You’re meddling again.”
“Unashamedly. But for a
good cause. You see an arrogant, self-assured man with the world at his
feet. I see a lonely little orphan, clutching Linis as if he never intended to
let go, and refusing to cry at his parents’ funeral. You scared him today. You
need to fix it.”
“By telling him how sick you were? It’s
true!”
“No, by giving into his bluff, and doing as
he predicted—walking away. Someone needs to introduce him to the concept of a
self-fulfilling prophecy.”
“Yes, they do. Okay, I’ll try, but I can’t
make him see me.”
“I know. Use Pyon. He can’t resist your
little kem any more than I can.” Pyon stuck his fluffy head up in enquiry,
hearing his name. “Yes, you, mischief. Go help Julian mend some fences.”
Pyon chirped and ran up the bed so he could
lick Leo’s chin. Leo laughed and Julian grinned as he lifted his cheeky kem off
the sick man’s chest. “I’ll come back afterwards.”
“Yes, do. It’s boring in here.”
“Brought you some books,” Julian said,
taking them out of the holdall, and placing the other personal items in the
locker. “I didn’t know what you’d like, but there’s a few different ones.”
Leo shook his head in amazement. “Julian,
you’re simply a treasure. Now, off you go.”
He couldn’t face Zachary immediately. He
needed to think, and make sure he could stay calm. He walked outside the
hospital, sat on a brick wall of a flowerbed, stared up at the brilliant summer
sky. The season was almost over. By the time Zachary was well again, it would
be nearly winter.
Leo was staying. Leo was old and had just
had a stroke, and was possibly the best friend Julian had ever had. And he had
a prick of a nephew who needed him too. Needed him so much he was too scared to
let him come close because he was bound to lose him.
Julian’s family were all
alive, even his grandparents. No one had ever died on him. The worst
thing that had ever happened to him was messily breaking up with his boyfriend
at University, and the two of them were sleeping with other people before the
week was out. Zachary and Leo had brought Julian the closest he’d ever come to
losing anyone who meant a damn thing to him. And it hurt.
How much more must it have hurt for
Zachary? Losing his parents, then his grandparents—who knew how many other
people had died or deserted or dumped him? How
like he can’t see the connection.”
“He probably can’t—or can’t allow himself
to. I’ve let him down, I know that.
I could have been closer, tried harder, but I let him move away, and then I
settled overseas, never thinking that I could have made a difference, when I
could and should have. I don’t know how many years I have left to me, but I'm
going to change things now. I'm going to live in this city, be close to him,
even if he pushes me away. I won’t let him be alone when I can be there.”
Julian squeezed Leo’s fingers. “He doesn’t
deserve you.”
“Yes, he does. And like him, I have a
weakness for wounded helpless things, even when I'm pretty helpless myself,” he
said with a wry smile.
“Will you be able to still stay with me?
Can you walk okay?”
“I'm fine. They think the symptoms will
disappear almost completely, but they’ve put me on some blood thinning
medication. I just need to take things easy, but I always do.”
“Coming up here three times a day and
buying an apartment isn’t taking it easy.”
“My boy, you’ve been doing most of the
work. But for a little while, I’ll have to ask you to do some more—do you
mind?”
“Of course not! What do you need?”
“I’d like you to take over visiting
Zachary, starting now.”
Julian took a deep breath, trying to stay
calm. “I can’t—he told me to get out. He’ll just call the nurses and make them
throw me out.”
Leo smiled and tightened his fingers a
little in Julian’s grip. “Oh, I think maybe he won’t. Will you try, for me?”
“You’re meddling again.”
“Unashamedly. But for a
good cause. You see an arrogant, self-assured man with the world at his
feet. I see a lonely little orphan, clutching Linis as if he never intended to
let go, and refusing to cry at his parents’ funeral. You scared him today. You
need to fix it.”
“By telling him how sick you were? It’s
true!”
“No, by giving into his bluff, and doing as
he predicted—walking away. Someone needs to introduce him to the concept of a
self-fulfilling prophecy.”
“Yes, they do. Okay, I’ll try, but I can’t
make him see me.”
“I know. Use Pyon. He can’t resist your
little kem any more than I can.” Pyon stuck his fluffy head up in enquiry,
hearing his name. “Yes, you, mischief. Go help Julian mend some fences.”
Pyon chirped and ran up the bed so he could
lick Leo’s chin. Leo laughed and Julian grinned as he lifted his cheeky kem off
the sick man’s chest. “I’ll come back afterwards.”
“Yes, do. It’s boring in here.”
“Brought you some books,” Julian said,
taking them out of the holdall, and placing the other personal items in the
locker. “I didn’t know what you’d like, but there’s a few different ones.”
Leo shook his head in amazement. “Julian,
you’re simply a treasure. Now, off you go.”
He couldn’t face Zachary immediately. He
needed to think, and make sure he could stay calm. He walked outside the
hospital, sat on a brick wall of a flowerbed, stared up at the brilliant summer
sky. The season was almost over. By the time Zachary was well again, it would
be nearly winter.
Leo was staying. Leo was old and had just
had a stroke, and was possibly the best friend Julian had ever had. And he had
a prick of a nephew who needed him too. Needed him so much he was too scared to
let him come close because he was bound to lose him.
Julian’s family were all
alive, even his grandparents. No one had ever died on him. The worst
thing that had ever happened to him was messily breaking up with his boyfriend
at University, and the two of them were sleeping with other people before the
week was out. Zachary and Leo had brought Julian the closest he’d ever come to
losing anyone who meant a damn thing to him. And it hurt.
How much more must it have hurt for
Zachary? Losing his parents, then his grandparents—who knew how many other
people had died or deserted or dumped him? How
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