cycle.
The articles on the table were more or less ready, and only the captions had to be honed.
Trude made her entrance, radiant and beautiful as always. Anna was often struck by her beauty on Mondays in particular. It was as if she had forgotten what her colleague looked like over the weekend, or suppressed it. By Wednesday she’d got used to it again, and when they left the office on Friday she no longer noticed, only to be reminded again after the weekend.
‘Watch out for Anna,’ Sissela told her. ‘She hasn’t slept well.’
‘Oh, why’s that?’ Trude asked.
Anna waved the question away.
‘Nothing in particular, just couldn’t sleep.’
‘Didn’t you have any pills?’
‘I don’t like pills, they totally zonk me out.’
‘And exactly how bright-eyed are you when you haven’t slept?’
Anna sipped her coffee and opened a file on the computer. She clicked on the caption as she read the headline, and tried to think of something better. Quote boxes generally started with ‘I’, ‘Now’ or ‘My’, which got a bit tedious when you flicked through the magazine. Like everything was just a regurgitation of something that had been said before.
‘I masturbate,’ Trude said. ‘Usually works.’
‘But then you just get turned on,’ Sissela countered.
‘Just a quickie. You come, big yawn and zonk. Out for the count.’
Anna wasn’t listening. She was sitting with her right hand on the pile of papers, the top page down to the left, pretending to look through the letters, which had now mutated into black spots.
She was scared. Scared of what lay ahead. Of it all coming out, the showdown. What would happen? How would it affect her marriage? Would Magnus stay? If not, how would they sort out all the practical issues? Their lifestyle was based on two salaries and there wasn’t much left over for any extras. She couldn’t bear the thought of an every-alternate-week life with Hedda. She couldn’t imagine a day without her daughter. Anna almost wished that Magnus would do the same thing so that she didn’t need to feel guilty. But that wouldn’t happen. Her husband wasn’t a ladies’ man. His sexual appetite wasn’t so great that it couldn’t easily be satisfied within social conventions. O happy martyr with good on your side.
‘I’ll have to try that next time,’ Sissela said. ‘I normally tense my body. You know, the kind of relaxation exercises we did in gym at school.’
Anna put her hand into her bag and checked her phone without taking it out. No text messages and no missed calls. At least Erik hadn’t tried to contact her again after that crazy conversation yesterday.
What if he was mad? Why had he picked her? It had been magical, it wasn’t that. But it was pretend, a random meeting, a parenthesis, something that happened outside ordinary, everyday life. Couldn’t he just be happy with that?
He had turned up at Laröd. Appeared from behind the bus like something out of a horror movie. He’d been sober then. Why would he take the bus if he hadn’t been drinking? What was it his friend was called? Something very ordinary. Andersson. Johan Andersson.
She went on to find.se, typed in the name and ‘Helsingborg’. Got more than twelve hits, but no Hittarp or Laröd. She felt her pulse rise, but then thought that maybe the phone was listed under his wife’s name. She tried with just Andersson, but was none the wiser. Over two thousand hits. She didn’t have time to trawl through them all. And she didn’t know if they were married, and even if they were, it didn’t mean that the wife had taken his name.
‘Enough,’ she said out loud, to stop herself from looking any more.
‘Enough what?’ Sissela asked.
Anna waved her hand.
‘Nothing. I’m just thinking out loud.’
She looked down at her captions again, pretended to read.
‘How are the advertising boys getting on?’ Trude asked.
Anna looked up, but realised the question was directed at Sissela.
‘How do
The articles on the table were more or less ready, and only the captions had to be honed.
Trude made her entrance, radiant and beautiful as always. Anna was often struck by her beauty on Mondays in particular. It was as if she had forgotten what her colleague looked like over the weekend, or suppressed it. By Wednesday she’d got used to it again, and when they left the office on Friday she no longer noticed, only to be reminded again after the weekend.
‘Watch out for Anna,’ Sissela told her. ‘She hasn’t slept well.’
‘Oh, why’s that?’ Trude asked.
Anna waved the question away.
‘Nothing in particular, just couldn’t sleep.’
‘Didn’t you have any pills?’
‘I don’t like pills, they totally zonk me out.’
‘And exactly how bright-eyed are you when you haven’t slept?’
Anna sipped her coffee and opened a file on the computer. She clicked on the caption as she read the headline, and tried to think of something better. Quote boxes generally started with ‘I’, ‘Now’ or ‘My’, which got a bit tedious when you flicked through the magazine. Like everything was just a regurgitation of something that had been said before.
‘I masturbate,’ Trude said. ‘Usually works.’
‘But then you just get turned on,’ Sissela countered.
‘Just a quickie. You come, big yawn and zonk. Out for the count.’
Anna wasn’t listening. She was sitting with her right hand on the pile of papers, the top page down to the left, pretending to look through the letters, which had now mutated into black spots.
She was scared. Scared of what lay ahead. Of it all coming out, the showdown. What would happen? How would it affect her marriage? Would Magnus stay? If not, how would they sort out all the practical issues? Their lifestyle was based on two salaries and there wasn’t much left over for any extras. She couldn’t bear the thought of an every-alternate-week life with Hedda. She couldn’t imagine a day without her daughter. Anna almost wished that Magnus would do the same thing so that she didn’t need to feel guilty. But that wouldn’t happen. Her husband wasn’t a ladies’ man. His sexual appetite wasn’t so great that it couldn’t easily be satisfied within social conventions. O happy martyr with good on your side.
‘I’ll have to try that next time,’ Sissela said. ‘I normally tense my body. You know, the kind of relaxation exercises we did in gym at school.’
Anna put her hand into her bag and checked her phone without taking it out. No text messages and no missed calls. At least Erik hadn’t tried to contact her again after that crazy conversation yesterday.
What if he was mad? Why had he picked her? It had been magical, it wasn’t that. But it was pretend, a random meeting, a parenthesis, something that happened outside ordinary, everyday life. Couldn’t he just be happy with that?
He had turned up at Laröd. Appeared from behind the bus like something out of a horror movie. He’d been sober then. Why would he take the bus if he hadn’t been drinking? What was it his friend was called? Something very ordinary. Andersson. Johan Andersson.
She went on to find.se, typed in the name and ‘Helsingborg’. Got more than twelve hits, but no Hittarp or Laröd. She felt her pulse rise, but then thought that maybe the phone was listed under his wife’s name. She tried with just Andersson, but was none the wiser. Over two thousand hits. She didn’t have time to trawl through them all. And she didn’t know if they were married, and even if they were, it didn’t mean that the wife had taken his name.
‘Enough,’ she said out loud, to stop herself from looking any more.
‘Enough what?’ Sissela asked.
Anna waved her hand.
‘Nothing. I’m just thinking out loud.’
She looked down at her captions again, pretended to read.
‘How are the advertising boys getting on?’ Trude asked.
Anna looked up, but realised the question was directed at Sissela.
‘How do
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