I make them colored?" Jason asked.
"Colored?" Travis looked at him confused as he pulled out a large bowl and then reached for the waffle iron.
"My mom used to make me green ones."
Travis looked at Evan, hoping he would know what Jason meant.
Evan shrugged, looking as lost as Travis was.
"How did she do that?" Travis pulled a measuring cup from the cupboard.
"She would put color in it. Little bottles of paint."
"Food coloring." Evan grinned.
"Ah, I don't know if I have any," Travis handed Jason a spoon. "I promise, next time we go to the store, we can get some."
They spent the next hour cooking and eating. Evan sat quiet most the meal, only really talking when someone spoke to him. Travis hated that Evan felt responsible for this.
Travis sent Jason off to play video once they cleared the table and sat back down with Evan. "You want coffee, tea?"
"No, I'm good." Evan glanced out the window at the pool. "We should have resisted. Waited until this was over."
"Would you quit worrying? Do you really think that either of us could have ignored the pull between us? The tension would have killed us. Yes, I'm mad. Not at you, but at whoever is spying on us, but I don't regret a damn thing. We will face whatever they decide. I'm not going to ever feel sorry we did things the way we have. If anything, I'm mad that we had to even try to hide it."
"Hopefully I did my job well enough, that even with my conflict of interest we have a strong enough case. I handed in a large file of information. Stuff that didn't have anything to do with you and me. I just hope it's enough."
"It will be. I have to believe that." He stretched his legs out in front of him as he heard Jason laughing from the living room. "I'm nervous about court. Have been all week. Oddly this doesn't make it any worse. I'm relieved we don’t have to hide any longer." Travis shrugged as he stared at Evan. "I can't let myself think I could lose him, I just can't. I know I should be preparing myself for the worst and maybe I'm stupid for not doing so, but I just can't think he might be gone by the end of the week."
Evan stood, coming around to stand behind Travis, bending down and wrapping his arms around him. "No matter what happens, you'll get through it." He brushed his lips over his ear. "I did everything I could to help you."
Something inside Travis snapped, emotions held in for too long bursting forward as tears filled his eyes and then fell down his cheeks. He fought to hold them back but lost the struggle as a hard sob escaped him.
Evan released him, moving around him and falling to his knees in front of Travis as he wrapped his arms around him and pulled him close. "It's okay. You're not alone. We will get through this." His voice was soft as he held the back of Travis's head to his shoulder and let him cry.
Travis struggled to fight back the emotion, but the moment Evan's arms came around him, holding him securely, the tears came harder. He cried in fear of losing Jason, he cried in pain for losing his sister, and he cried for the man holding him, scared somehow he would be taken from him, too. His chest heaved as he fought through the emotions, and held onto Evan, letting him comfort him.
When he was finally able to stop the tears, he pulled back, wiping his face with the back of his hand. He stared at Evan in front of him, embarrassed by his tears and sudden breakdown, fearing that it would only add to Evan's guilt at their relationship. "Sorry." He sniffed. "I just think it's emotional overload."
Evan braced his hands on Travis's thighs, still kneeling before him. "I think you have the right. You've been dealing with so much the last month. Don't feel bad for crying in front of me. I want to be there for you."
"You have been. You have no idea how you have helped me get through all this. My sister's death, this stuff with Jason and the Steeles, you have been my support. I look forward to your visits more than you know."
"I know. Trust me, I know."
"Colored?" Travis looked at him confused as he pulled out a large bowl and then reached for the waffle iron.
"My mom used to make me green ones."
Travis looked at Evan, hoping he would know what Jason meant.
Evan shrugged, looking as lost as Travis was.
"How did she do that?" Travis pulled a measuring cup from the cupboard.
"She would put color in it. Little bottles of paint."
"Food coloring." Evan grinned.
"Ah, I don't know if I have any," Travis handed Jason a spoon. "I promise, next time we go to the store, we can get some."
They spent the next hour cooking and eating. Evan sat quiet most the meal, only really talking when someone spoke to him. Travis hated that Evan felt responsible for this.
Travis sent Jason off to play video once they cleared the table and sat back down with Evan. "You want coffee, tea?"
"No, I'm good." Evan glanced out the window at the pool. "We should have resisted. Waited until this was over."
"Would you quit worrying? Do you really think that either of us could have ignored the pull between us? The tension would have killed us. Yes, I'm mad. Not at you, but at whoever is spying on us, but I don't regret a damn thing. We will face whatever they decide. I'm not going to ever feel sorry we did things the way we have. If anything, I'm mad that we had to even try to hide it."
"Hopefully I did my job well enough, that even with my conflict of interest we have a strong enough case. I handed in a large file of information. Stuff that didn't have anything to do with you and me. I just hope it's enough."
"It will be. I have to believe that." He stretched his legs out in front of him as he heard Jason laughing from the living room. "I'm nervous about court. Have been all week. Oddly this doesn't make it any worse. I'm relieved we don’t have to hide any longer." Travis shrugged as he stared at Evan. "I can't let myself think I could lose him, I just can't. I know I should be preparing myself for the worst and maybe I'm stupid for not doing so, but I just can't think he might be gone by the end of the week."
Evan stood, coming around to stand behind Travis, bending down and wrapping his arms around him. "No matter what happens, you'll get through it." He brushed his lips over his ear. "I did everything I could to help you."
Something inside Travis snapped, emotions held in for too long bursting forward as tears filled his eyes and then fell down his cheeks. He fought to hold them back but lost the struggle as a hard sob escaped him.
Evan released him, moving around him and falling to his knees in front of Travis as he wrapped his arms around him and pulled him close. "It's okay. You're not alone. We will get through this." His voice was soft as he held the back of Travis's head to his shoulder and let him cry.
Travis struggled to fight back the emotion, but the moment Evan's arms came around him, holding him securely, the tears came harder. He cried in fear of losing Jason, he cried in pain for losing his sister, and he cried for the man holding him, scared somehow he would be taken from him, too. His chest heaved as he fought through the emotions, and held onto Evan, letting him comfort him.
When he was finally able to stop the tears, he pulled back, wiping his face with the back of his hand. He stared at Evan in front of him, embarrassed by his tears and sudden breakdown, fearing that it would only add to Evan's guilt at their relationship. "Sorry." He sniffed. "I just think it's emotional overload."
Evan braced his hands on Travis's thighs, still kneeling before him. "I think you have the right. You've been dealing with so much the last month. Don't feel bad for crying in front of me. I want to be there for you."
"You have been. You have no idea how you have helped me get through all this. My sister's death, this stuff with Jason and the Steeles, you have been my support. I look forward to your visits more than you know."
"I know. Trust me, I know."
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