The Very Best of F & SF v1 by Gordon Van Gelder (ed) Page A

inkblots are
stupid. And those pictures are stupid too. I like to draw a picture of a man
and a woman but I wont make up lies about people.
    I got a headache
from trying to think so much. I thot Dr Strauss was my frend but he dont help
me. He dont tell me what to think or when I’ll get smart. Miss Kinnian dint
come to see me. I think writing these progress reports are stupid too.
     
    Progress Report 8—Mar 23
    Im going back to
work at the factery. They said it was better I shud go back to work but I cant
tell anyone what the operashun was for and I have to come to
the hospitil for an hour evry night after work. They are gonna pay me mony
every month for lerning to be smart. Im glad Im going back to work because I
miss my job and all my frends and all the fun we have there.
    Dr Strauss says
I shud keep writing things down but I dont have to do it every day just when I
think of something or something speshul happins. He says dont get discoridged
because it takes time and it happins slow. He says it took a long time with
Algernon before he got 3 times smarter then he was before. Thats why Algernon
beats me all the time because he had that operashun too. That makes me feel
better. I coud probly do that amazed faster than a reglar mouse. Maybe some
day I’ll beat Algernon. Boy that would be something. So far Algernon looks like
he mite be smart perminent.
    Mar 25 (I dont have to write PROGRESS REPORT on top any more just when I
hand it in once a week for Dr Nemur to read. I just have to put the date on.
That saves time)
    We had a lot of
fun at the factery today. Joe Carp said hey look where Charlie had his
operashun what did they do Charlie put some brains in. I was going to tell him
but I remembered Dr Strauss said no. Then Frank Reilly said what did you do
Charlie forget your key and open your door the hard way. That made me laff.
Their really my friends and they like me.
    Sometimes
somebody will say hey look at Joe or Frank or George he really pulled a Charlie
Gordon. I dont know why they say that but they always laff. This morning Amos
Borg who is the 4 man at Donnegans used my name when he shouted at Ernie the
office boy. Ernie lost a packige. He said Ernie for godsake what are you trying
to be a Charlie Gordon. I dont understand why he said that. I never lost any
packiges.
     
    Mar 28 Dr Strauss came to my room tonight to see why I dint come in like I
was suppose to. I told him I dont like to race with Algernon any more. He said
I dont have to for a while but I shud come in. He had a present for me only it
wasnt a present but just for lend. I thot it was a little television but it
wasnt. He said I got to turn it on when I go to sleep. I said your kidding why
shud I turn it on when Im going to sleep. Who ever herd of a thing like that.
But he said if I want to get smart I got to do what he says. I told him I dint
think I was going to get smart and he put his hand on my sholder and said
Charlie you dont know it yet but your getting smarter all the time. You wont
notice for a while. I chink he was just being nice to make me feel good because
I dont look any smarter.
    Oh yes I almost
forgot. I asked him when I can go back to the class at Miss Kinnians school. He
said I wont go their. He said that soon Miss Kinnian will come to the hospitil
to start and teach me speshul. I was mad at her for not comming to see me when
I got the operashun but I like her so maybe we will be frends again.
     
    Mar 29 That crazy TV kept me up all night. How can I sleep with something
yelling crazy things all night in my ears. And the nutty pictures. Wow. I dont
know what it says when Im up so how am I going to know when Im sleeping.
    Dr Strauss says
its ok. He says my brains are lerning when I sleep and that will help me when
Miss Kinnian starts my lessons in the hospitl (only I found out it isnt a
hospitil its a labatory). I think its all crazy. If you can get smart when your
sleeping why do people go to school. That thing I dont think will