my dad
is and he's not Chase."
We sat for another brief moment in silence,
during which I felt like a complete idiot, and then he added, "Why
would it be a problem for you if I were?"
"Because," I started to say then you couldn't
be my boyfriend, but then I remembered that Jake had never really
given me any indication that he wanted to be my boyfriend.
"That would just be… weird," I fumbled.
Jake looked anxious, and shrugged. "Maybe you
thought if I were your brother then this might not be a good
idea."
And then he leaned over, turned my face
toward his and kissed me. He kissed me in the way that Kevin the
mystery St. John's student had not, in a way that was both gentle
and ravenous. I could taste the orange Sunkist that he had drank
back at the amphitheater on him, and something else, intangible,
something potent and itchy and out of control. I grabbed him by the
front of his t-shirt to pull him closer and kissed back.
The rest of the world disappeared during
those moments. I felt like if I opened my eyes the hospital parking
lot would be gone and it would just be Jake and me, the only two
people left in the world. There was something completely consuming
and overwhelming about kissing him like that. Something that made
me feel like I could walk away from everything in my life and never
look back as long as I had Jake in my future.
Suddenly Jake leaned back, leaving me
gasping.
"We should get back to the hotel," he said,
hopping off the hood of the car.
"Um… OK," I agreed reluctantly, not knowing
exactly what had caused him to shut down so instantaneously. I
would have been willing to make out on the hood of his car all
night. Maybe even longer, it felt so good to be with someone who
understood me and actually wanted me to be around.
We drove the lengthy forty-five minute
expanse of highway back to the hotel mostly in silence, except for
the part when we both realized we were hopelessly lost and Jake
stopped at a gas station to ask for directions.
As we stepped into the lobby, I wasn't sure
what to say. All of our encounters up until that point had occurred
pretty much by chance. I didn't even have his phone number. But it
occurred to me as we were about to possibly say goodnight that I
was going to be desperate to see him again.
"Well, thanks for… everything," I said. I
wanted to tell him that I had a great time, but I had only had a
great time for the fifteen minutes that we were fooling around on
the hood of the car. The rest of the night had monumentally sucked
and I was dreading having to face my father and Jill in the
morning.
"No problem," Jake said.
"Do you want to come upstairs?" I asked on a
whim. It was one-thirty in the morning but my sleepiness earlier in
the evening had disappeared.
Jake mumbled, "I'll walk you up to your
room."
This struck me as kind of odd, as I was
wondering what part of the hotel he and his mom were staying in. In
the elevator ride on the way up to our suite, our fingers brushed
and he took my hand automatically and squeezed it. My heart
swelled. I wanted nothing other than for him to kiss me again like
he had in the parking lot but I was too shy to initiate anything,
especially knowing that there was a security camera in the
elevator.
I used my key card to open the front door to
our suite, and then nervously said, "You can come in, if you want.
We could order room service."
He anxiously stepped inside the living room
area of the suite, and looked around nervously. "Nah, I probably
shouldn't be here. I don't want your dad to think I'm a
troublemaker."
I bit my lip. I really did not want this
night to end on an awkward note.
"I don't think my dad thinks you're a
troublemaker. But even if he did, I don't care what he thinks about
you," I assured him, and added, "I really like you, Jake."
That was the catalyst for him to place his
hands on my hips and start kissing me again. This time he started
kissing me softly up and down my neck and my knees became so weak
is and he's not Chase."
We sat for another brief moment in silence,
during which I felt like a complete idiot, and then he added, "Why
would it be a problem for you if I were?"
"Because," I started to say then you couldn't
be my boyfriend, but then I remembered that Jake had never really
given me any indication that he wanted to be my boyfriend.
"That would just be… weird," I fumbled.
Jake looked anxious, and shrugged. "Maybe you
thought if I were your brother then this might not be a good
idea."
And then he leaned over, turned my face
toward his and kissed me. He kissed me in the way that Kevin the
mystery St. John's student had not, in a way that was both gentle
and ravenous. I could taste the orange Sunkist that he had drank
back at the amphitheater on him, and something else, intangible,
something potent and itchy and out of control. I grabbed him by the
front of his t-shirt to pull him closer and kissed back.
The rest of the world disappeared during
those moments. I felt like if I opened my eyes the hospital parking
lot would be gone and it would just be Jake and me, the only two
people left in the world. There was something completely consuming
and overwhelming about kissing him like that. Something that made
me feel like I could walk away from everything in my life and never
look back as long as I had Jake in my future.
Suddenly Jake leaned back, leaving me
gasping.
"We should get back to the hotel," he said,
hopping off the hood of the car.
"Um… OK," I agreed reluctantly, not knowing
exactly what had caused him to shut down so instantaneously. I
would have been willing to make out on the hood of his car all
night. Maybe even longer, it felt so good to be with someone who
understood me and actually wanted me to be around.
We drove the lengthy forty-five minute
expanse of highway back to the hotel mostly in silence, except for
the part when we both realized we were hopelessly lost and Jake
stopped at a gas station to ask for directions.
As we stepped into the lobby, I wasn't sure
what to say. All of our encounters up until that point had occurred
pretty much by chance. I didn't even have his phone number. But it
occurred to me as we were about to possibly say goodnight that I
was going to be desperate to see him again.
"Well, thanks for… everything," I said. I
wanted to tell him that I had a great time, but I had only had a
great time for the fifteen minutes that we were fooling around on
the hood of the car. The rest of the night had monumentally sucked
and I was dreading having to face my father and Jill in the
morning.
"No problem," Jake said.
"Do you want to come upstairs?" I asked on a
whim. It was one-thirty in the morning but my sleepiness earlier in
the evening had disappeared.
Jake mumbled, "I'll walk you up to your
room."
This struck me as kind of odd, as I was
wondering what part of the hotel he and his mom were staying in. In
the elevator ride on the way up to our suite, our fingers brushed
and he took my hand automatically and squeezed it. My heart
swelled. I wanted nothing other than for him to kiss me again like
he had in the parking lot but I was too shy to initiate anything,
especially knowing that there was a security camera in the
elevator.
I used my key card to open the front door to
our suite, and then nervously said, "You can come in, if you want.
We could order room service."
He anxiously stepped inside the living room
area of the suite, and looked around nervously. "Nah, I probably
shouldn't be here. I don't want your dad to think I'm a
troublemaker."
I bit my lip. I really did not want this
night to end on an awkward note.
"I don't think my dad thinks you're a
troublemaker. But even if he did, I don't care what he thinks about
you," I assured him, and added, "I really like you, Jake."
That was the catalyst for him to place his
hands on my hips and start kissing me again. This time he started
kissing me softly up and down my neck and my knees became so weak
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