little wax to anchor his candle, sets it upon that spot, holds it in place until it’s fixed.
DOREL
Mount.
(DAVID climbs onto the seat)
Back to where you were?
DAVID
Yes.
They arrive in front of the governor’s mansion, DAVID dismounts, sets the kickstand. The front door opens. BETTY appears.
BETTY
Dave!
(DAVID watches as she approaches him. They embrace.)
Dave, what happened? You just sort of faded away.
DAVID
My godfather, Morrie, took me. I’d done something he didn’t like.
BETTY
Your godfather? You never mentioned him before. How could he do that?
DAVID
He is a person with a great power over life, who is responsible for whatever power I possess over death. Fortunately, he thinks I’m dead now. So I believe I’ll have some reconstructive surgery, change the spelling of my name, grow a beard, move to another state and run a small, low-key practice to cover the expense of my bleafage research. I love you. Will you marry me and come along?
DOREL
I hate to tell you that you sound a little crazy, Dave, but you do.
BETTY
(staring at bike)
Are you a ventriloquist, too?
DAVID
No, that was Dorel talking. He just saved my life. He’s a rebel spirit doing time as a bicycle, and he’s been with me since I was a kid. Saved my life a couple of times then, too.
DAVID pats DOREL’s seat. BETTY leans forward and kisses the top of the handlebars.
BETTY
I know. I’ve ridden him with you, remember? Thanks, Dorel, whatever you are.
DOREL falls apart into a smoking collection of golden motes.
BETTY
What did I just set off?
DAVID
Beats me. But since there was no frog I don’t think you get a prince.
BETTY
Guess I’m stuck with you, then.
They watch as the bright cloud assembles itself into a human shape—that of a tall, bewhiskered man in buckskins. He bows to BETTY.
DON LAUREL
Don Laurel. At your service, ma’am.
(He turns and shakes DAVID’s hand.)
Sorry to deprive you of transportation, Dave. But I just got my enchantment broken.
DAVID
Calls for a celebration.
DON LAUREL
(shaking his head)
Now that I’m unbiked I have to find a niche quick, or I’ll fade to airy nothingness. So I’ll be heading back below, and I’ll take up residence in the caves. He’ll never spot an extra invisible entity. And I’ll keep moving both of your candles out of his way. Good luck with the bleafage work. I’ll be in touch.
He turns to smoke again. When it clears he is gone.
DAVID
That’s a relief.
(He embraces BETTY once again.)
But I wish things had gone differently with Morrie. I like him. I’m going to miss him.
BETTY
He doesn’t exactly sound like a nice guy.
DAVID
His line of work hardens him a bit. He’s actually quite sensitive.
BETTY
How can you tell?
DAVID
He likes football and chess.
BETTY
They both represent violence—physical, and abstract.
DAVID
…and hot chocolate. And Schubert’s Quartet in D Minor. And he does care about the balance between life and death, most of the time.
BETTY
I know he’s family. But he scares me.
DAVID
{SONG: LET’S DO IT}
I want to run away with you
And live with you and walk with you
And all those other things they do
When people fall in love.
All those years we missed
With days we never kissed
Were times ground down to grist
Without your love.
The chariot’s wings were clipped,
Its wheels greased.
I could not hear it at my back
Nor to the west nor east.
I’d set upon a fast track and I tripped.
I’d cast away remembering,
I’d walked away from you,
Forgetting all the things that make up love.
Come live with me and let us see
And prove and hold and just plain be
Whatever’s best for you and me
Now we have found our love.
I want to run away with you
And live with you and walk with you
And all the other things they do
When people fall in love.
BETTY comes in on repeat of last two stanzas.
BETTY & DAVID
Come live with me and let us see
And prove and hold and just plain be
Whatever’s best for you and me
Now we have found
DOREL
Mount.
(DAVID climbs onto the seat)
Back to where you were?
DAVID
Yes.
They arrive in front of the governor’s mansion, DAVID dismounts, sets the kickstand. The front door opens. BETTY appears.
BETTY
Dave!
(DAVID watches as she approaches him. They embrace.)
Dave, what happened? You just sort of faded away.
DAVID
My godfather, Morrie, took me. I’d done something he didn’t like.
BETTY
Your godfather? You never mentioned him before. How could he do that?
DAVID
He is a person with a great power over life, who is responsible for whatever power I possess over death. Fortunately, he thinks I’m dead now. So I believe I’ll have some reconstructive surgery, change the spelling of my name, grow a beard, move to another state and run a small, low-key practice to cover the expense of my bleafage research. I love you. Will you marry me and come along?
DOREL
I hate to tell you that you sound a little crazy, Dave, but you do.
BETTY
(staring at bike)
Are you a ventriloquist, too?
DAVID
No, that was Dorel talking. He just saved my life. He’s a rebel spirit doing time as a bicycle, and he’s been with me since I was a kid. Saved my life a couple of times then, too.
DAVID pats DOREL’s seat. BETTY leans forward and kisses the top of the handlebars.
BETTY
I know. I’ve ridden him with you, remember? Thanks, Dorel, whatever you are.
DOREL falls apart into a smoking collection of golden motes.
BETTY
What did I just set off?
DAVID
Beats me. But since there was no frog I don’t think you get a prince.
BETTY
Guess I’m stuck with you, then.
They watch as the bright cloud assembles itself into a human shape—that of a tall, bewhiskered man in buckskins. He bows to BETTY.
DON LAUREL
Don Laurel. At your service, ma’am.
(He turns and shakes DAVID’s hand.)
Sorry to deprive you of transportation, Dave. But I just got my enchantment broken.
DAVID
Calls for a celebration.
DON LAUREL
(shaking his head)
Now that I’m unbiked I have to find a niche quick, or I’ll fade to airy nothingness. So I’ll be heading back below, and I’ll take up residence in the caves. He’ll never spot an extra invisible entity. And I’ll keep moving both of your candles out of his way. Good luck with the bleafage work. I’ll be in touch.
He turns to smoke again. When it clears he is gone.
DAVID
That’s a relief.
(He embraces BETTY once again.)
But I wish things had gone differently with Morrie. I like him. I’m going to miss him.
BETTY
He doesn’t exactly sound like a nice guy.
DAVID
His line of work hardens him a bit. He’s actually quite sensitive.
BETTY
How can you tell?
DAVID
He likes football and chess.
BETTY
They both represent violence—physical, and abstract.
DAVID
…and hot chocolate. And Schubert’s Quartet in D Minor. And he does care about the balance between life and death, most of the time.
BETTY
I know he’s family. But he scares me.
DAVID
{SONG: LET’S DO IT}
I want to run away with you
And live with you and walk with you
And all those other things they do
When people fall in love.
All those years we missed
With days we never kissed
Were times ground down to grist
Without your love.
The chariot’s wings were clipped,
Its wheels greased.
I could not hear it at my back
Nor to the west nor east.
I’d set upon a fast track and I tripped.
I’d cast away remembering,
I’d walked away from you,
Forgetting all the things that make up love.
Come live with me and let us see
And prove and hold and just plain be
Whatever’s best for you and me
Now we have found our love.
I want to run away with you
And live with you and walk with you
And all the other things they do
When people fall in love.
BETTY comes in on repeat of last two stanzas.
BETTY & DAVID
Come live with me and let us see
And prove and hold and just plain be
Whatever’s best for you and me
Now we have found
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