something a little more... aesthetic? It looks like a bicycle chain.”
“That’s exactly the kind of chain I used as a model.”
Johnny had known Galileo for many years now, and knew that attempting to inquire why a chain of all things would result in nothing but a headache. Therefore he decided to return to his previous line of questioning, which seemed to him to be slightly safer.
“So,” he said. “You’ve analyzed and received. What’d you get out of it?”
“My piece does a superposition of the signals originating at your end over the electromagnetic activity, sort of, of my own brain. Not constantly, of course; single pulses. What happens then, according to the Schrödingerian Principle of Reaction—you’re heard of Schrödinger’s Dogs, right?”
“Never mind,” said Johnny, accepting, not for the first time, that he would never understand what his friend was trying to accomplish, any more than Galileo could grasp the meaning behind his whimsi-mathematical rhymes. “For you, my dear, I am all ears—and if my rear—”
“Excellent,” said Galileo, and put on his own chain. “If you’ll just let me turn on the machine—”
“Go ahead.”
Galileo pulled a switch out of his pocket and flipped it.
Nothing happened, of course.
~
“Perhaps,” said Galileo after some time has passed, “this needs a bit more work. Just don’t take the chain off, okay?”
“Okay,” said Johnny.
“Not even in the shower,” said Galileo.
“Fine.”
“Not even if she and you... well... you know...”
“What?”
“Well, er...”
“ Are you mental? Having sex while wearing a bicycle chain? What do I look like to you?”
“Look,” said Galileo. “It’s a scientific experiment. You can’t be allowed to bias the results!”
Johnny mulled it over. “You’re right,” he said eventually. “Okay. I can’t promise anything, but if that happens...”
“I owe you,” said Galileo.
“It’s okay,” said Johnny. “I know you’d do the same for me.”
~
Ada was making another espresso in the poorly lit club kitchen, when suddenly she felt someone watching her.
“You!” she said. “You ain’t tryin’ to sneak in again, are ya?”
“Just to look at you!” said the redheaded semi-geek peeking out from behind the stove.
“Getouttahere, ya freak! I dunno why I let you into the club yesterday, but it ain’t gonna happen today. Out!”
“But why?”
“Why? Whaddahelldayamean, ‘why’? You following me around all the time, distoibing clients, screwing up oiders, and you’re asking me why?!”
She’s so cute when she’s thermal, thought Johnny.
~
Meanwhile, a tiny thermostat broke down and silently turned off the air conditioner in Galileo’s apartment. In the basement, Galileo felt pleasant warmth spreading through his body. “It’s working!” he said aloud, wrongfully. “At last!” He hurried outside. With a little luck, he’d fall in love with the first girl he’ll meet. Or so he thought.
~
“—and you have no idea how my boss flipped after that,” said Ada, who, in spite of everything, enjoyed the attention. “Believe me, I’d love to woik in hi-tech instedda this stinkin’ club—”
~
On the stairs, Galileo met a downstairs neighbor whom he had always ignored, stepping out of her apartment.
“Good evening,” he said politely. “How do you do?”
The neighbor, who was thin and somewhat mousy, though not uncomely, stared at him suspiciously.
“All right...” she said cautiously.
She’s cute , thought Galileo, it’s working! —and politely introduced himself: “I’m Galileo, from upstairs. Are you new in the building?”
“I’ve been living here for two years,” said the neighbor, offended.
“Oh,” said Galileo. “How is it then that we’ve never met before?”
The neighbor had no polite answer to this question, and so remained quiet.
“Well then,” said Galileo. “So... I’m Galileo, and you are...” he glanced at the sign
“That’s exactly the kind of chain I used as a model.”
Johnny had known Galileo for many years now, and knew that attempting to inquire why a chain of all things would result in nothing but a headache. Therefore he decided to return to his previous line of questioning, which seemed to him to be slightly safer.
“So,” he said. “You’ve analyzed and received. What’d you get out of it?”
“My piece does a superposition of the signals originating at your end over the electromagnetic activity, sort of, of my own brain. Not constantly, of course; single pulses. What happens then, according to the Schrödingerian Principle of Reaction—you’re heard of Schrödinger’s Dogs, right?”
“Never mind,” said Johnny, accepting, not for the first time, that he would never understand what his friend was trying to accomplish, any more than Galileo could grasp the meaning behind his whimsi-mathematical rhymes. “For you, my dear, I am all ears—and if my rear—”
“Excellent,” said Galileo, and put on his own chain. “If you’ll just let me turn on the machine—”
“Go ahead.”
Galileo pulled a switch out of his pocket and flipped it.
Nothing happened, of course.
~
“Perhaps,” said Galileo after some time has passed, “this needs a bit more work. Just don’t take the chain off, okay?”
“Okay,” said Johnny.
“Not even in the shower,” said Galileo.
“Fine.”
“Not even if she and you... well... you know...”
“What?”
“Well, er...”
“ Are you mental? Having sex while wearing a bicycle chain? What do I look like to you?”
“Look,” said Galileo. “It’s a scientific experiment. You can’t be allowed to bias the results!”
Johnny mulled it over. “You’re right,” he said eventually. “Okay. I can’t promise anything, but if that happens...”
“I owe you,” said Galileo.
“It’s okay,” said Johnny. “I know you’d do the same for me.”
~
Ada was making another espresso in the poorly lit club kitchen, when suddenly she felt someone watching her.
“You!” she said. “You ain’t tryin’ to sneak in again, are ya?”
“Just to look at you!” said the redheaded semi-geek peeking out from behind the stove.
“Getouttahere, ya freak! I dunno why I let you into the club yesterday, but it ain’t gonna happen today. Out!”
“But why?”
“Why? Whaddahelldayamean, ‘why’? You following me around all the time, distoibing clients, screwing up oiders, and you’re asking me why?!”
She’s so cute when she’s thermal, thought Johnny.
~
Meanwhile, a tiny thermostat broke down and silently turned off the air conditioner in Galileo’s apartment. In the basement, Galileo felt pleasant warmth spreading through his body. “It’s working!” he said aloud, wrongfully. “At last!” He hurried outside. With a little luck, he’d fall in love with the first girl he’ll meet. Or so he thought.
~
“—and you have no idea how my boss flipped after that,” said Ada, who, in spite of everything, enjoyed the attention. “Believe me, I’d love to woik in hi-tech instedda this stinkin’ club—”
~
On the stairs, Galileo met a downstairs neighbor whom he had always ignored, stepping out of her apartment.
“Good evening,” he said politely. “How do you do?”
The neighbor, who was thin and somewhat mousy, though not uncomely, stared at him suspiciously.
“All right...” she said cautiously.
She’s cute , thought Galileo, it’s working! —and politely introduced himself: “I’m Galileo, from upstairs. Are you new in the building?”
“I’ve been living here for two years,” said the neighbor, offended.
“Oh,” said Galileo. “How is it then that we’ve never met before?”
The neighbor had no polite answer to this question, and so remained quiet.
“Well then,” said Galileo. “So... I’m Galileo, and you are...” he glanced at the sign
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