weight slowly but steadily returns to my shoulders.
We go for a quick drink at the Tiki Bar. Marty and Bridget are in high spirits at completing their course. Now we can go diving anywhere in the world, and I should be happy like them, but I just feel dead inside. They sit at a table with Ted and Monica and I go to the bar to order our drinks.
‘What time do you leave tomorrow?’ I freeze as I realise Leo has joined me at the bar.
‘Eleven-ish,’ I reply with a sideways glance at him. He nods and looks up as the bartender materialises in front of us. I give him my order, then turn to Leo. ‘What are you and Jorge having?’
‘I’ll get these,’ he says.
‘Don’t be silly, it’s the least I can do … for my buddy,’ I add in a slightly silly voice.
He smirks and glances at the bartender. ‘Two beers.’
‘Could have guessed that.’ I smile at him and suddenly feel awkward.
‘Are you feeling any better about going home?’ I realise he looks as uncomfortable as I must do.
‘No,’ I say with a half-hearted shrug. I can’t think of anything better to say and then the bartender returns with our drinks, so that’s the extent of our conversation.
‘Come on, then.’ Marty slaps my knee half an hour later.
That means we’re going. I’ve barely spoken since sitting down. It’s like Leo and I have been in a competition to see who can say the least.
‘Good luck, girls! Have a great time in Miami,’ Jorge says warmly.
‘You, too,’ Marty responds. ‘Maybe see you there!’
‘I doubt it. It’s a big city,’ he replies cheerfully.
‘Thanks so much for everything. You’re a great instructor,’ Bridget says to him.
‘You’re welcome.’ He grins. ‘Keep diving!’
‘Yeah, thanks,’ Marty adds.
If I could feel any less alive I would surely turn into a zombie.
‘Bye,’ I say to Leo.
‘Bye.’ He offers me a brusque smile, but it doesn’t meet his eyes.
‘See ya later!’ Bridget calls as she and Marty start to wander away to the car, but I can’t tear myself away yet.
‘Thanks again for all your help,’ I tell Leo.
‘You didn’t need it,’ he says.
‘Leo!’ We turn to see Tegan beckoning to him from the office.
He stands up, so we walk together across the road towards the office and the car park. But I can’t think of anything at all to say, and neither, it seems, can he.
‘See you, then,’ I say when I reach the point where I have to tail off.
‘Bye,’ he responds, heading into the office with his head down.
I feel so flat. That felt wrong. Surely that won’t be the last time I see him? Maybe I can pop by in the morning. I hold onto this thought to try to ease my pain.
We go out for one last night in Duval Street before returning to the balcony for a nightcap. Bridget and Marty call it a night, but I tell them I’ll stay here for a little longer. I’ve got too much on my mind, and I’m not ready to say goodnight to Key West yet. I can hear the low hum of traffic passing by on the street below, and the leaves on the Spanish laurel tree in front of the balcony are rustling in the breeze. Latin music makes its way to my ears. On autopilot I get up and walk to the far end of the balcony. Leo’s garden is lit with fairy lights, and I don’t care if it’s a bad idea or not but I’m going to say goodbye.
I hurry down the steps before I can change my mind.
My spirits deflate when I peer through the palm tree near the street to see Carmen and Eric sitting on the sofa, but thankfully Jorge and Leo are in the armchairs. I’m damned if I’m going to let Carmen put me off what I set out to do.
Four sets of eyes stare at me as they hear the gate latch.
‘It’s just me,’ I say, lifting my hand in a half wave as I close the gate behind me. Leo and Jorge seem surprised, thankfully not unpleasantly so. I try not to look at Carmen or Eric.
I halt in my steps as the dog starts to run towards me, barking. Damn. Forgot about him. I hope he doesn’t bite
We go for a quick drink at the Tiki Bar. Marty and Bridget are in high spirits at completing their course. Now we can go diving anywhere in the world, and I should be happy like them, but I just feel dead inside. They sit at a table with Ted and Monica and I go to the bar to order our drinks.
‘What time do you leave tomorrow?’ I freeze as I realise Leo has joined me at the bar.
‘Eleven-ish,’ I reply with a sideways glance at him. He nods and looks up as the bartender materialises in front of us. I give him my order, then turn to Leo. ‘What are you and Jorge having?’
‘I’ll get these,’ he says.
‘Don’t be silly, it’s the least I can do … for my buddy,’ I add in a slightly silly voice.
He smirks and glances at the bartender. ‘Two beers.’
‘Could have guessed that.’ I smile at him and suddenly feel awkward.
‘Are you feeling any better about going home?’ I realise he looks as uncomfortable as I must do.
‘No,’ I say with a half-hearted shrug. I can’t think of anything better to say and then the bartender returns with our drinks, so that’s the extent of our conversation.
‘Come on, then.’ Marty slaps my knee half an hour later.
That means we’re going. I’ve barely spoken since sitting down. It’s like Leo and I have been in a competition to see who can say the least.
‘Good luck, girls! Have a great time in Miami,’ Jorge says warmly.
‘You, too,’ Marty responds. ‘Maybe see you there!’
‘I doubt it. It’s a big city,’ he replies cheerfully.
‘Thanks so much for everything. You’re a great instructor,’ Bridget says to him.
‘You’re welcome.’ He grins. ‘Keep diving!’
‘Yeah, thanks,’ Marty adds.
If I could feel any less alive I would surely turn into a zombie.
‘Bye,’ I say to Leo.
‘Bye.’ He offers me a brusque smile, but it doesn’t meet his eyes.
‘See ya later!’ Bridget calls as she and Marty start to wander away to the car, but I can’t tear myself away yet.
‘Thanks again for all your help,’ I tell Leo.
‘You didn’t need it,’ he says.
‘Leo!’ We turn to see Tegan beckoning to him from the office.
He stands up, so we walk together across the road towards the office and the car park. But I can’t think of anything at all to say, and neither, it seems, can he.
‘See you, then,’ I say when I reach the point where I have to tail off.
‘Bye,’ he responds, heading into the office with his head down.
I feel so flat. That felt wrong. Surely that won’t be the last time I see him? Maybe I can pop by in the morning. I hold onto this thought to try to ease my pain.
We go out for one last night in Duval Street before returning to the balcony for a nightcap. Bridget and Marty call it a night, but I tell them I’ll stay here for a little longer. I’ve got too much on my mind, and I’m not ready to say goodnight to Key West yet. I can hear the low hum of traffic passing by on the street below, and the leaves on the Spanish laurel tree in front of the balcony are rustling in the breeze. Latin music makes its way to my ears. On autopilot I get up and walk to the far end of the balcony. Leo’s garden is lit with fairy lights, and I don’t care if it’s a bad idea or not but I’m going to say goodbye.
I hurry down the steps before I can change my mind.
My spirits deflate when I peer through the palm tree near the street to see Carmen and Eric sitting on the sofa, but thankfully Jorge and Leo are in the armchairs. I’m damned if I’m going to let Carmen put me off what I set out to do.
Four sets of eyes stare at me as they hear the gate latch.
‘It’s just me,’ I say, lifting my hand in a half wave as I close the gate behind me. Leo and Jorge seem surprised, thankfully not unpleasantly so. I try not to look at Carmen or Eric.
I halt in my steps as the dog starts to run towards me, barking. Damn. Forgot about him. I hope he doesn’t bite
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