reads: "CHATTER CHATTER CHATTER"
13
This morning, while I was waiting for Mom to be done with her shower, I remembered someone gave her a bathrobe for Christmas. So I went into her closet and got it.
Let me just say that was one of the smartest moves I've ever made. Wearing that thing was like being wrapped in a big, fluffy towel that just came out of the dryer.
In fact, I liked it so much, I even wore it AFTER my shower. I think Dad might've been jealous He didn't come up with the robe idea first, because when I came to the kitchen table, he seemed extra-grumpy.
[Image: A boy enters and a man is sitting at the table and reading the newspaper.] The caption reads: "MORNIN'!"
14
I tell you, women have the right idea with this bathrobe thing. Now I'm wondering what ELSE I'm missing out on.
I just wish I had asked for my own bathrobe for Christmas, because I'm sure Mom is gonna make me give hers back.
I struck out on gifts again this year. I knew I was in for a rough day when I came downstairs on Christmas morning and the only presents in my stocking were a stick of deodorant and a "travel dictionary."
[Image: A boy checks his Christmas stocking .] The caption reads: "RODRICK
GREGORY"
I guess once you're in middle school, grown-ups decide you're too old for toys or anything that's actually fun.
15
But then they still expect you to be all excited when you open the lame gifts they get you.
[Image: Two ladies telling a boy to work hard in math.] The caption reads:
"
MATH IS RAD
IT'LL HELP YOU GET A JUMP-START ON ALGEBRA!"
Most of my gifts this year were books or clothes. The closest thing I got to a toy was a present from Uncle Charlie.
When I unwrapped Uncle Charlies's gift, I didn't even know what it was supposed to be. It was this big plastic ring with a net attached to it.
[Image: A big plastic ring with a net attached.]
16
Uncle Charlie explained that it was a "Laundry Hoop" for my bedroom. He said I was supposed to hang the Laundry Hoop on the back of my door and it would make putting away my dirty clothes "fun."
[Image: A man scolds the boy for using the net as a basket.] The caption reads: "TOSS"
At first I thought it was a joke, but then I realized Uncle Charlie was serious. So I had to explain to him that I don't actually DO my own laundry.
17
I told him I just throw my dirty clothes on the floor, and Mom picks them up and takes them downstairs to the laundry room.
[Image: A boy talking to a man and a lady.]
Then a few days later, everything comes back to me in nice, folded piles.
I told Uncle Charlie he should just return the Laundry Hoop and give me cash so I could buy something I'd actually USE.
That's when Mom spoke up. She told Uncle Charlie she thought the Laundry Hoop was a GREAT idea.
18
Then she said that from now on I'd be doing my OWN laundry. So basically, it ends up that Uncle Charlie got me a chore for Christmas.
It really stinks that I got such crummy gifts this year. I put in a lot of effort buttering people up for the past few months, and I thought it would pay off on Christmas.
[Image: A boy shovels the snow outside the old man's house.]
[Image: A boy showing his pants to the old man.]
Now that I'm responsible for my own laundry, I guess I'm kind of GLAD I got a bunch of clothes. I might actually make it through the whole school year before I run out of clean stuff to wear.
19
Monday
When me and Rowley got to our bus stop today, we found a nasty surprise. There was a piece of paper taped to our street sign, and it said that, effective today, our bus route was "rezoned." And what that means is now we have to WALK to school.
[Image: Two boys are standing at a bus stop.]
Well, I'd like to talk to the genius who came up with THAT idea, because our street is almost a quarter of a mile from the school.
Me and Rowley had to run to make it to school on time today. And what REALLY stunk was when our regular bus passed us by and it was full of kids from Whirley Street,
13
This morning, while I was waiting for Mom to be done with her shower, I remembered someone gave her a bathrobe for Christmas. So I went into her closet and got it.
Let me just say that was one of the smartest moves I've ever made. Wearing that thing was like being wrapped in a big, fluffy towel that just came out of the dryer.
In fact, I liked it so much, I even wore it AFTER my shower. I think Dad might've been jealous He didn't come up with the robe idea first, because when I came to the kitchen table, he seemed extra-grumpy.
[Image: A boy enters and a man is sitting at the table and reading the newspaper.] The caption reads: "MORNIN'!"
14
I tell you, women have the right idea with this bathrobe thing. Now I'm wondering what ELSE I'm missing out on.
I just wish I had asked for my own bathrobe for Christmas, because I'm sure Mom is gonna make me give hers back.
I struck out on gifts again this year. I knew I was in for a rough day when I came downstairs on Christmas morning and the only presents in my stocking were a stick of deodorant and a "travel dictionary."
[Image: A boy checks his Christmas stocking .] The caption reads: "RODRICK
GREGORY"
I guess once you're in middle school, grown-ups decide you're too old for toys or anything that's actually fun.
15
But then they still expect you to be all excited when you open the lame gifts they get you.
[Image: Two ladies telling a boy to work hard in math.] The caption reads:
"
MATH IS RAD
IT'LL HELP YOU GET A JUMP-START ON ALGEBRA!"
Most of my gifts this year were books or clothes. The closest thing I got to a toy was a present from Uncle Charlie.
When I unwrapped Uncle Charlies's gift, I didn't even know what it was supposed to be. It was this big plastic ring with a net attached to it.
[Image: A big plastic ring with a net attached.]
16
Uncle Charlie explained that it was a "Laundry Hoop" for my bedroom. He said I was supposed to hang the Laundry Hoop on the back of my door and it would make putting away my dirty clothes "fun."
[Image: A man scolds the boy for using the net as a basket.] The caption reads: "TOSS"
At first I thought it was a joke, but then I realized Uncle Charlie was serious. So I had to explain to him that I don't actually DO my own laundry.
17
I told him I just throw my dirty clothes on the floor, and Mom picks them up and takes them downstairs to the laundry room.
[Image: A boy talking to a man and a lady.]
Then a few days later, everything comes back to me in nice, folded piles.
I told Uncle Charlie he should just return the Laundry Hoop and give me cash so I could buy something I'd actually USE.
That's when Mom spoke up. She told Uncle Charlie she thought the Laundry Hoop was a GREAT idea.
18
Then she said that from now on I'd be doing my OWN laundry. So basically, it ends up that Uncle Charlie got me a chore for Christmas.
It really stinks that I got such crummy gifts this year. I put in a lot of effort buttering people up for the past few months, and I thought it would pay off on Christmas.
[Image: A boy shovels the snow outside the old man's house.]
[Image: A boy showing his pants to the old man.]
Now that I'm responsible for my own laundry, I guess I'm kind of GLAD I got a bunch of clothes. I might actually make it through the whole school year before I run out of clean stuff to wear.
19
Monday
When me and Rowley got to our bus stop today, we found a nasty surprise. There was a piece of paper taped to our street sign, and it said that, effective today, our bus route was "rezoned." And what that means is now we have to WALK to school.
[Image: Two boys are standing at a bus stop.]
Well, I'd like to talk to the genius who came up with THAT idea, because our street is almost a quarter of a mile from the school.
Me and Rowley had to run to make it to school on time today. And what REALLY stunk was when our regular bus passed us by and it was full of kids from Whirley Street,
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