is propping up your house of cards.”
“Do you mean you’re lonely? That you wish you had a wife?” I asked, puzzled. It was the first hint I’d ever had that he wasn’t happy being a bachelor.
“Does it surprise you?” he asked rather sardonically. “Never thought your brother could be anything other than your handy little helper, did you? Never suspected that poor, bumbling old Aaron might be a man with needs and desires, have you? Never considered that I might dream of a woman waiting for me at home, even if she’s only half as good a catch as the trophy wife you bagged for yourself by banging her?”
“No,” I said, “or rather, yes, of course I’ve thought about it, and I’ve never understood why women seem to leave you cold. At first I used to wonder if you were more attracted to men, but I’ve never seen you show the slightest inclination in that direction either.”
Aaron laughed. “You don’t know me at all, little brother,” he scoffed, his gaze traveling outside the window. “I think that I see through you far better than you see through me. It isn’t hard for me to figure out what you’re up to with the girls you call into your office, you know. Whenever I catch myself in a moment of weakness, like right now, I only have to think about you, and how you’re cheating on your lovely wife, to squash every bit of desire I have. I wouldn’t for the life of me want to turn into a despicable bastard like you!”
I looked down at the ground. Aaron and Levine were pretty much the only ones in the world who could make me feel bad about myself.
“I do struggle with it, and try to stop myself,” I said sullenly. “Still, I don’t see that I’m doing anything wrong. I’m giving them the child they so dearly want, or helping them get over their sexual frustration.”
Aaron let out a loud and bitter laugh. “A factory boss who fucks the young girls in his employ, and then has the gall to claim with a straight face that he isn’t doing anything wrong! Motke, you’re a disgusting piece of shit.”
“And you’re a frigid, gutless schmuck who doesn’t have what it takes,” I fumed, and stormed out, slamming the door behind me.
In the days following this episode, Aaron’s words kept coming back to me. I was in the process of purchasing a tract of land across from the plant, since I envisaged that we’d need to expand soon and wanted to provide Farmacom with its own research and lab-animal facility. It was an exciting prospect, but the thought of Aaron’s rebuke soured my mood. I couldn’t help thinking somberly that my brother was right. I was constantly cheating on my “lovely wife,” Rivka, and abusing my position of authority in the company.
I resolved to rid myself of these bad habits and to be an irreproachable husband and boss from now on. I made a concerted effort to remain faithful to my Rivka and to leave the factory girls alone, even sending away the ones who came to me voluntarily, trying instead to focus all my energies on the two companies, which took so much work to run.
I kept it up for two weeks. Like an alcoholic who’s on the wagon and can’t think of anything but the damn bottle, I found those days an interminable hell. I just wasn’t up to handling our German subsidiary with my usual sangfroid or decisiveness as they tried to wriggle out of our price agreement. My normallysharp mind seemed to be wholly and obsessively occupied with female buttocks, boobs, and pussy. My common sense was in thrall to my beast, which would get hard at the most inopportune times. Jerking off provided only temporary relief. At night, as soon as the children were in bed, I’d try to get Rivka to have sex with me, but I was so importunate and impatient about it that one fine night she pushed me away and announced she wouldn’t sleep with me anymore. She banished me to the guest room and, from that day on, avoided all physical contact with me.
• • •
On the seventh day of the
“Do you mean you’re lonely? That you wish you had a wife?” I asked, puzzled. It was the first hint I’d ever had that he wasn’t happy being a bachelor.
“Does it surprise you?” he asked rather sardonically. “Never thought your brother could be anything other than your handy little helper, did you? Never suspected that poor, bumbling old Aaron might be a man with needs and desires, have you? Never considered that I might dream of a woman waiting for me at home, even if she’s only half as good a catch as the trophy wife you bagged for yourself by banging her?”
“No,” I said, “or rather, yes, of course I’ve thought about it, and I’ve never understood why women seem to leave you cold. At first I used to wonder if you were more attracted to men, but I’ve never seen you show the slightest inclination in that direction either.”
Aaron laughed. “You don’t know me at all, little brother,” he scoffed, his gaze traveling outside the window. “I think that I see through you far better than you see through me. It isn’t hard for me to figure out what you’re up to with the girls you call into your office, you know. Whenever I catch myself in a moment of weakness, like right now, I only have to think about you, and how you’re cheating on your lovely wife, to squash every bit of desire I have. I wouldn’t for the life of me want to turn into a despicable bastard like you!”
I looked down at the ground. Aaron and Levine were pretty much the only ones in the world who could make me feel bad about myself.
“I do struggle with it, and try to stop myself,” I said sullenly. “Still, I don’t see that I’m doing anything wrong. I’m giving them the child they so dearly want, or helping them get over their sexual frustration.”
Aaron let out a loud and bitter laugh. “A factory boss who fucks the young girls in his employ, and then has the gall to claim with a straight face that he isn’t doing anything wrong! Motke, you’re a disgusting piece of shit.”
“And you’re a frigid, gutless schmuck who doesn’t have what it takes,” I fumed, and stormed out, slamming the door behind me.
In the days following this episode, Aaron’s words kept coming back to me. I was in the process of purchasing a tract of land across from the plant, since I envisaged that we’d need to expand soon and wanted to provide Farmacom with its own research and lab-animal facility. It was an exciting prospect, but the thought of Aaron’s rebuke soured my mood. I couldn’t help thinking somberly that my brother was right. I was constantly cheating on my “lovely wife,” Rivka, and abusing my position of authority in the company.
I resolved to rid myself of these bad habits and to be an irreproachable husband and boss from now on. I made a concerted effort to remain faithful to my Rivka and to leave the factory girls alone, even sending away the ones who came to me voluntarily, trying instead to focus all my energies on the two companies, which took so much work to run.
I kept it up for two weeks. Like an alcoholic who’s on the wagon and can’t think of anything but the damn bottle, I found those days an interminable hell. I just wasn’t up to handling our German subsidiary with my usual sangfroid or decisiveness as they tried to wriggle out of our price agreement. My normallysharp mind seemed to be wholly and obsessively occupied with female buttocks, boobs, and pussy. My common sense was in thrall to my beast, which would get hard at the most inopportune times. Jerking off provided only temporary relief. At night, as soon as the children were in bed, I’d try to get Rivka to have sex with me, but I was so importunate and impatient about it that one fine night she pushed me away and announced she wouldn’t sleep with me anymore. She banished me to the guest room and, from that day on, avoided all physical contact with me.
• • •
On the seventh day of the
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