and may St. Andrew show mercy. Ye will need it.”
Chapter 13
Brianna gazed beyond the velvet night sky, over-sewn with a thousand twinkling diamonds, absently stroking Tam’s belly as he sprawled on his back beside her, his body boneless in sleep. She wished she could enjoy such peace.
Maude nudged her, demanding equal attention. Brianna rubbed her hand over her soft muzzle, wondering at the changes in her life. ’Tis been scarcely more than a month since I sat at home, smug in my conviction I helped the people of Wyndham. Scarcely a month ago I believed I was in charge of my own destiny.
Now, the earth itself had opened at her feet and it remained to be seen if she would find her footing or fall into endless darkness. With her ma gone and her da’s actions and thoughts questionable and unpredictable at best, she had no one to trust and counsel her which way to turn.
Nae, that isnae true. Auld Willie is on my side, though he is at Wyndham with Jamie. And Gavin—what a surprise. Always he has been there, whether to tell me I couldnae ride Da’s temperamental stallion or comforting me when Ma died. I thought him a friend—what if he had been more?
She felt someone behind her, unnerved to feel Conn’s presence so distinctly. “Go away!” she whispered roughly, her voice thick with regret. Regret for the decision she knew she had to make, regret for a life that left her subject to the whim of others.
“May I sit with ye a while?”
Brianna closed her eyes. She could withstand him better if he were cloddish, arrogant, crude or a brute. Aye, these things she knew and could deal with. ’Twas true he was arrogant, but he tempered it with a gentleness slowly slipping past her defenses.
She faced him. He tilted his head in silent invitation and she shifted the puppy down a bit, allowing him to sit next to her.
“This will work, Brianna. Ye know it will.”
“How can it when ye dinnae know me?”
“I know ye well enough.”
She gave him a look of profound disgust. “Ye are basing yer whole assumption on a few misguided moments we spent together. Ye are squandering my whole life on a foolish moment of passion. When will ye decide ye need to know me?”
Conn took a deep breath and Brianna was aware he clung to a thin tissue of restraint. “Ye dinnae know me, either.”
“I know enough,” she tossed back at him.
“Ye know rumors. Not me.”
“Ye lost yer lady love to another and left yer responsibilities at Morven to drown yer sorrows.”
His eyes flashed, but his voice remained even. “The young woman’s husband had been missing over a year, assumed dead. He and I had been as brothers. I grew to love the lass, but to be truthful, I later realized I was more in love with her bairn, in love with the idea I could do something worthy for my dead friend by raising his son.” His gaze dropped and Brianna saw his hands clench, his knuckles turn white. “To atone for being alive.”
Sympathy prickled in her throat. “I am truly sorry for yer loss. And I will believe ye if ye say ye dinnae spend the past year astride any willing lass. But I am not sure how to make our marriage work when we each want different things.”
“Had I never met ye, were ye only a name scratched on the betrothal, mayhap I could let ye go. But I have seen ye, heard ye plead for yer people, and felt ye in my arms. I couldnae ask for a better woman to bring to Morven as my wife.” He gently cupped her face in his hands. “Will ye marry me, Brianna?”
She touched the side of his face with the backs of her fingers, tracing a line from his temple past his cheek, lingering on the rough stubble of a day’s growth. He turned his face into her hand, and kissed the palm. Her fingers closed over where his lips touched, holding the heat of it.
“Ask me again in two weeks.”
Conn stared deeply into her eyes, seeing her waver when her words spoke denial. He could point out she really had no choice in the matter—she already
Chapter 13
Brianna gazed beyond the velvet night sky, over-sewn with a thousand twinkling diamonds, absently stroking Tam’s belly as he sprawled on his back beside her, his body boneless in sleep. She wished she could enjoy such peace.
Maude nudged her, demanding equal attention. Brianna rubbed her hand over her soft muzzle, wondering at the changes in her life. ’Tis been scarcely more than a month since I sat at home, smug in my conviction I helped the people of Wyndham. Scarcely a month ago I believed I was in charge of my own destiny.
Now, the earth itself had opened at her feet and it remained to be seen if she would find her footing or fall into endless darkness. With her ma gone and her da’s actions and thoughts questionable and unpredictable at best, she had no one to trust and counsel her which way to turn.
Nae, that isnae true. Auld Willie is on my side, though he is at Wyndham with Jamie. And Gavin—what a surprise. Always he has been there, whether to tell me I couldnae ride Da’s temperamental stallion or comforting me when Ma died. I thought him a friend—what if he had been more?
She felt someone behind her, unnerved to feel Conn’s presence so distinctly. “Go away!” she whispered roughly, her voice thick with regret. Regret for the decision she knew she had to make, regret for a life that left her subject to the whim of others.
“May I sit with ye a while?”
Brianna closed her eyes. She could withstand him better if he were cloddish, arrogant, crude or a brute. Aye, these things she knew and could deal with. ’Twas true he was arrogant, but he tempered it with a gentleness slowly slipping past her defenses.
She faced him. He tilted his head in silent invitation and she shifted the puppy down a bit, allowing him to sit next to her.
“This will work, Brianna. Ye know it will.”
“How can it when ye dinnae know me?”
“I know ye well enough.”
She gave him a look of profound disgust. “Ye are basing yer whole assumption on a few misguided moments we spent together. Ye are squandering my whole life on a foolish moment of passion. When will ye decide ye need to know me?”
Conn took a deep breath and Brianna was aware he clung to a thin tissue of restraint. “Ye dinnae know me, either.”
“I know enough,” she tossed back at him.
“Ye know rumors. Not me.”
“Ye lost yer lady love to another and left yer responsibilities at Morven to drown yer sorrows.”
His eyes flashed, but his voice remained even. “The young woman’s husband had been missing over a year, assumed dead. He and I had been as brothers. I grew to love the lass, but to be truthful, I later realized I was more in love with her bairn, in love with the idea I could do something worthy for my dead friend by raising his son.” His gaze dropped and Brianna saw his hands clench, his knuckles turn white. “To atone for being alive.”
Sympathy prickled in her throat. “I am truly sorry for yer loss. And I will believe ye if ye say ye dinnae spend the past year astride any willing lass. But I am not sure how to make our marriage work when we each want different things.”
“Had I never met ye, were ye only a name scratched on the betrothal, mayhap I could let ye go. But I have seen ye, heard ye plead for yer people, and felt ye in my arms. I couldnae ask for a better woman to bring to Morven as my wife.” He gently cupped her face in his hands. “Will ye marry me, Brianna?”
She touched the side of his face with the backs of her fingers, tracing a line from his temple past his cheek, lingering on the rough stubble of a day’s growth. He turned his face into her hand, and kissed the palm. Her fingers closed over where his lips touched, holding the heat of it.
“Ask me again in two weeks.”
Conn stared deeply into her eyes, seeing her waver when her words spoke denial. He could point out she really had no choice in the matter—she already
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