confused, but he sat back down.
“I like it here,” I said, looking around at the wooden walls, the worn arm of the sofa, how different everything was from the cold, plain house I had been living in with him.
“We used to come here,” he said. “Myra and I. After my wife and I divorced.”
“It’s nice,” I offered.
His thumb stroked the edge of mine. “I would take her fishing by the lake out back. In the summer.” He smiled to himself. “She never wanted to throw them back, she wanted to keep everything we caught as a pet.”
I laughed at his story, despite how sad the circumstances were. This was once a place for father and daughter, now it was a place that had been untouched, probably since the last time she was here. It was like we were sitting in her grave and she wasn’t even dead yet.
Jonah looked me in the eye. “I wish…”
He had trailed off, but I didn’t give him a chance to finish. I kissed him hard on the mouth, like I could breathe life back into his still lungs, make his heart beat once more. “I’ll help you,” I whispered.
***
Our food comes not long after we order it. Mom digs into her salad while I pick the sesame seeds off of the bun of my hamburger.
“So you have to tell me something about your trip,” Mom says. “Come on, any schools you're interested in?”
I look up from my plate and smile. “Kind of,” I say. “I'm not sure if I'm going to go anymore, though.”
Mom's face falls. “What do you mean? You were so set on going to college.”
I tear my sandwich in half and take a bite even though the smell of ketchup makes my stomach turn. “I know,” I say, chewing for longer than I have to before continuing. “I just think I want to stay closer to home for a while, you know?”
Mom smiles knowingly. “You missed us that much, huh?”
Without warning, my throat becomes tight. “Yeah,” I say, somehow managing to not cry.
The rest of the meal is pretty smooth. We talk about how Dad was driving her crazy and how work went for Mom while I was in Boston. I remember to text Jonah as our check arrives.
Me: Hey, landed a little while ago.
Jonah: Good. My flight was delayed an hour.
Jonah: It’ll be okay
And I knew he was saying it for the both of us.
“Who are you talking to?” Mom asks as the waitress takes her credit card. “Don't tell me you met a boy out there.”
I can't keep the smile from my face.
“Oh my goodness!” Mom practically squeals. “Tell me all about him.”
I take a deep breath. “I will, Mom,” I say. “As soon as we're home.”
She sighs dramatically. “Okay,” she says in surrender. “I'm going to go to the bathroom.”
Mom excuses herself and I watch her walk off. The waitress comes back with her card and I thank her. My phone buzzes in my pocket.
Jonah: Are you with your parents yet?
I feel stupid for not telling him sooner.
Me: Yes.
Me: Well, my Mom.
Me: She wants to know who I'm texting.
Jonah: Did you tell her I'm a twelve year old boy?
Me: Should have.
Me: It'll be okay.
My phone buzzes again, but I can't see what it says. I blink a few times, afraid that my vision is blurring when I haven't even been home a few hours yet. But when I focus, the reality of the situation is worse. There’s a drop of blood on my phone screen.
I reach up to my nose and pull my hand away. My palm is covered in blood. I rip napkins from the table, trying to staunch the bleeding before my mom comes back.
When I look toward the bathroom, not only is half of the restaurant staring at me, but my mom is rushing toward me, fear etched into her face.
***
The drive back to Jonah’s house was quiet, but not uncomfortably so. We stepped out of the car and back into the cold, walking side by side in the snow as our boots crunched down the thin top layer. He opened the door for me and I walked in ahead of him. I shrugged out of my coat while simultaneously kicking off my boots by the door so I
“I like it here,” I said, looking around at the wooden walls, the worn arm of the sofa, how different everything was from the cold, plain house I had been living in with him.
“We used to come here,” he said. “Myra and I. After my wife and I divorced.”
“It’s nice,” I offered.
His thumb stroked the edge of mine. “I would take her fishing by the lake out back. In the summer.” He smiled to himself. “She never wanted to throw them back, she wanted to keep everything we caught as a pet.”
I laughed at his story, despite how sad the circumstances were. This was once a place for father and daughter, now it was a place that had been untouched, probably since the last time she was here. It was like we were sitting in her grave and she wasn’t even dead yet.
Jonah looked me in the eye. “I wish…”
He had trailed off, but I didn’t give him a chance to finish. I kissed him hard on the mouth, like I could breathe life back into his still lungs, make his heart beat once more. “I’ll help you,” I whispered.
***
Our food comes not long after we order it. Mom digs into her salad while I pick the sesame seeds off of the bun of my hamburger.
“So you have to tell me something about your trip,” Mom says. “Come on, any schools you're interested in?”
I look up from my plate and smile. “Kind of,” I say. “I'm not sure if I'm going to go anymore, though.”
Mom's face falls. “What do you mean? You were so set on going to college.”
I tear my sandwich in half and take a bite even though the smell of ketchup makes my stomach turn. “I know,” I say, chewing for longer than I have to before continuing. “I just think I want to stay closer to home for a while, you know?”
Mom smiles knowingly. “You missed us that much, huh?”
Without warning, my throat becomes tight. “Yeah,” I say, somehow managing to not cry.
The rest of the meal is pretty smooth. We talk about how Dad was driving her crazy and how work went for Mom while I was in Boston. I remember to text Jonah as our check arrives.
Me: Hey, landed a little while ago.
Jonah: Good. My flight was delayed an hour.
Jonah: It’ll be okay
And I knew he was saying it for the both of us.
“Who are you talking to?” Mom asks as the waitress takes her credit card. “Don't tell me you met a boy out there.”
I can't keep the smile from my face.
“Oh my goodness!” Mom practically squeals. “Tell me all about him.”
I take a deep breath. “I will, Mom,” I say. “As soon as we're home.”
She sighs dramatically. “Okay,” she says in surrender. “I'm going to go to the bathroom.”
Mom excuses herself and I watch her walk off. The waitress comes back with her card and I thank her. My phone buzzes in my pocket.
Jonah: Are you with your parents yet?
I feel stupid for not telling him sooner.
Me: Yes.
Me: Well, my Mom.
Me: She wants to know who I'm texting.
Jonah: Did you tell her I'm a twelve year old boy?
Me: Should have.
Me: It'll be okay.
My phone buzzes again, but I can't see what it says. I blink a few times, afraid that my vision is blurring when I haven't even been home a few hours yet. But when I focus, the reality of the situation is worse. There’s a drop of blood on my phone screen.
I reach up to my nose and pull my hand away. My palm is covered in blood. I rip napkins from the table, trying to staunch the bleeding before my mom comes back.
When I look toward the bathroom, not only is half of the restaurant staring at me, but my mom is rushing toward me, fear etched into her face.
***
The drive back to Jonah’s house was quiet, but not uncomfortably so. We stepped out of the car and back into the cold, walking side by side in the snow as our boots crunched down the thin top layer. He opened the door for me and I walked in ahead of him. I shrugged out of my coat while simultaneously kicking off my boots by the door so I
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