you’re wearing, given half the chance.’
Connor tickles Ellie’s tummy, transforming her frown into peals of giggles.
‘He’s not going to forget again, though, are you, Daddy? ’Cos now we’ve got the chart on the fridge.’
‘A chart on the fridge, huh? That sounds very organized.’
‘We can but hope. Ellie’s gone through the calendar highlighting all the days she needs her PE kit so that I have advance warning of when to wash it. Although there are only a couple of weeks of term left now, aren’t there, angel, so we’ll have to remember to do it again in September?’
‘Don’t worry, Daddy. I won’t forget.’
‘So what’s on the line-up for today, then? Are you going to win some races and make your daddy and me proud?’
‘Um, I don’t know. I’ll try. But Miss Collins says it doesn’t matter who wins. She says it’s all just for fun.’
‘Well, Miss Collins clearly hasn’t learnt yet that it’s a dog-eat-dog world out there. Just remember, you don’t get one of those nice shiny medals if you come second.’
Max rolls his eyes and pulls Ellie on to his lap.
‘Don’t listen to Uncle Connor, sweetheart. He doesn’t understand that not everything in life is a competition. You just have a good time and enjoy yourself. Do you know who you’re doing the three-legged race with yet?’
‘Yes, Miss Collins let us choose so me and Megan are doing it together.’
‘That’s great. You two will make a great pairing. And who’s giving out the prizes this year?’
Now it’s Ellie’s turn to roll her eyes.
‘Mr Baxter, like always, Daddy.’
‘Which one’s Mr Baxter, again?’
‘Aw, Daddy, you know Mr Baxter. He does all our games lessons. He’s my favourite. He’s really funny.’
‘Yes, I remember now. Isn’t he the one you say looks like a Labrador puppy?’
‘Shhhh, Daddy. What if someone hears you? Then we’ll get into trouble.’
‘Oh, I think we’ll be okay, munchkin. If anyone tells Mr Baxter what we said I promise to take the rap and say it was all my fault.’
Ellie giggles and kisses Max squarely on the lips. I close my eyes and remember the feeling of her soft, plump lips on mine.
‘Look, I think Miss Collins is calling you all back over. Hop off, munchkin, and we’ll see you in a bit.’
Ellie tightens her lithe, T-shirted arms around Max’s neck.
‘Can’t I just stay here with you and Uncle Connor for a bit?’
‘What, and miss out on all the fun? Don’t be silly, angel. The first race will be starting soon.’
‘I don’t want to go yet.’
Ellie buries her plaintive voice under Max’s chin, tightening her grip further.
‘You don’t want to hang out with us old fogeys when you could be with your friends, do you? And if you stayhere with your daddy and me you don’t even stand a chance of winning one of those medals.’
Ellie doesn’t answer Connor, burrowing her face further into Max’s shoulder, an attempt, perhaps, to render herself invisible so she’ll never have to move. Max encloses her in his arms, as if to protect her from the sadness he’d do anything to alleviate.
I’d been hoping she wouldn’t be plagued today by memories of last year, that they wouldn’t impede her enjoyment this time around. I’d been confident that Connor’s presence might provide enough of a distraction to allow Ellie to experience this annual school ritual afresh.
Because last year’s Sports Day had been horrendous. I’d been dead for just over two months and Ellie was too confused and withdrawn still to interact with her friends, let alone compete against them. She’d burst into tears spontaneously and repeatedly and no one – not Max, not the teachers and certainly not the other parents – had known how to console her. Max had taken her home early in the end, where he’d tucked her under a blanket on the sofa and watched Monsters, Inc. with her, the film that Ellie had viewed repeatedly in the months after I died. Later Max had
Connor tickles Ellie’s tummy, transforming her frown into peals of giggles.
‘He’s not going to forget again, though, are you, Daddy? ’Cos now we’ve got the chart on the fridge.’
‘A chart on the fridge, huh? That sounds very organized.’
‘We can but hope. Ellie’s gone through the calendar highlighting all the days she needs her PE kit so that I have advance warning of when to wash it. Although there are only a couple of weeks of term left now, aren’t there, angel, so we’ll have to remember to do it again in September?’
‘Don’t worry, Daddy. I won’t forget.’
‘So what’s on the line-up for today, then? Are you going to win some races and make your daddy and me proud?’
‘Um, I don’t know. I’ll try. But Miss Collins says it doesn’t matter who wins. She says it’s all just for fun.’
‘Well, Miss Collins clearly hasn’t learnt yet that it’s a dog-eat-dog world out there. Just remember, you don’t get one of those nice shiny medals if you come second.’
Max rolls his eyes and pulls Ellie on to his lap.
‘Don’t listen to Uncle Connor, sweetheart. He doesn’t understand that not everything in life is a competition. You just have a good time and enjoy yourself. Do you know who you’re doing the three-legged race with yet?’
‘Yes, Miss Collins let us choose so me and Megan are doing it together.’
‘That’s great. You two will make a great pairing. And who’s giving out the prizes this year?’
Now it’s Ellie’s turn to roll her eyes.
‘Mr Baxter, like always, Daddy.’
‘Which one’s Mr Baxter, again?’
‘Aw, Daddy, you know Mr Baxter. He does all our games lessons. He’s my favourite. He’s really funny.’
‘Yes, I remember now. Isn’t he the one you say looks like a Labrador puppy?’
‘Shhhh, Daddy. What if someone hears you? Then we’ll get into trouble.’
‘Oh, I think we’ll be okay, munchkin. If anyone tells Mr Baxter what we said I promise to take the rap and say it was all my fault.’
Ellie giggles and kisses Max squarely on the lips. I close my eyes and remember the feeling of her soft, plump lips on mine.
‘Look, I think Miss Collins is calling you all back over. Hop off, munchkin, and we’ll see you in a bit.’
Ellie tightens her lithe, T-shirted arms around Max’s neck.
‘Can’t I just stay here with you and Uncle Connor for a bit?’
‘What, and miss out on all the fun? Don’t be silly, angel. The first race will be starting soon.’
‘I don’t want to go yet.’
Ellie buries her plaintive voice under Max’s chin, tightening her grip further.
‘You don’t want to hang out with us old fogeys when you could be with your friends, do you? And if you stayhere with your daddy and me you don’t even stand a chance of winning one of those medals.’
Ellie doesn’t answer Connor, burrowing her face further into Max’s shoulder, an attempt, perhaps, to render herself invisible so she’ll never have to move. Max encloses her in his arms, as if to protect her from the sadness he’d do anything to alleviate.
I’d been hoping she wouldn’t be plagued today by memories of last year, that they wouldn’t impede her enjoyment this time around. I’d been confident that Connor’s presence might provide enough of a distraction to allow Ellie to experience this annual school ritual afresh.
Because last year’s Sports Day had been horrendous. I’d been dead for just over two months and Ellie was too confused and withdrawn still to interact with her friends, let alone compete against them. She’d burst into tears spontaneously and repeatedly and no one – not Max, not the teachers and certainly not the other parents – had known how to console her. Max had taken her home early in the end, where he’d tucked her under a blanket on the sofa and watched Monsters, Inc. with her, the film that Ellie had viewed repeatedly in the months after I died. Later Max had
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