COCKS in it yet?” And then she sticks her ass against the bars with her back furburger sticking out at the officers. One announces the very obvious fact that she’s drunk and goes outside for a cigarette because he’s a total douchebag.
The guy who remains is like twenty — clearly the rookie. But the joke is on the other motherfuckers, because the prisoner is down to fuck. So Autumn gets all prison movie on him and keeps pushing her pussy up between the bars and grabbing her tits and fingering herself. Eventually she gets the cop to stick his dick between the bars and sucks it for a while, then turns around to take his meat in her snatch. The cop doesn’t give a tiny shit about how drunk or disorderly she is and starts to open the door, but Autumn is like FUCK THAT I WANT JAIL ASS and tells him to fuck her like six different ways, all of which are totally awkward. Then he blows a giant load on her face and in her hair.
The cop then lets her go. She came, so she’s quieter and more satisfied. She declines a ride and runs right back out into the woods, where the LARP dorks are still playing. She’s still got a face and hairdo full of jizz, so they declare her an “elf whore” and pretend to bludgeon her to death, thus ending her character’s life in the game. The story ends when Autumn recovers a dropped wizard’s staff and fucks it until she cums again, then wakes up sticky with some hobo watching her while eating beans from a can.
Of course the real story is nowhere near this ridiculous, but it’s also not especially funny. Maybe even sad.
A U G U S T 25
I GOT CAUGHT UP OVER the last few days and — horror! — failed to listen to the Self Publishing Podcast until two days after it was released. I felt like such a commoner. And of all weeks, too, since it was an episode that got me really excited. No, not like that.
The bulk of the episode was all about how to go from self-publication to getting an agent. It was interesting, but I don’t really want an agent for my stuff. But it did sort of redefine how the game has changed. Specifically, authors are now the ones in charge, and good authors who can build their own audiences and their own success hold a lot of power. Agents and publishers can now come to US.
But that’s not why I got excited. At the very end, their guest made a joke about maybe going into erotica, and the three hosts kind of jumped all over that, agreeing that, yeah, erotica was an interesting market, and that they should have an erotica author on. They were pro smut, not at all looking down on it. On the heels of the success of 50 Shades of Grey , the world has sorta started to open up about sex and even S&M, and the erotica market is now hard to ignore.
It made me proud — and, I’ll be honest, a little wet — to realize these guys I’ve been stalking are so open-minded about the smut market and even maybe interested in it. Johnny sounded like he almost wanted to write it, LOL.
Their talk about all of the “50 Shades” spinoffs (specifically 50 Shades of Alice in Wonderland ) also seemed serendipitous since I decided to release 50 Shades of Lexi Maxxwell .
I should write my thoughts on my 50 Shades before I forget the thoughts behind it, but I’m way too horny. Sam’s out tonight. Might be time to fire up my sex toy collection.
A U G U S T 26
OKAY, FOR THE RECORD, HERE’S the basics behind my own 50 Shades collection. First, I wrote 50 absolutely filthy stories (holy crap, how did I write 50 already? That’s insane!) and then I bundled them all together into this one massive collection that sells for $9.99. Everyone wins. I win because with Amazon’s 70% commission structure, I make $7 for each one I sell. (And damn well I should; I wrote it and 50 stories is a fuckload of writing time!) My awesome readers win because it’s a crazy amount of content and costs a lot less than the stories, which sell for 99 cents each, would cost if purchased
The guy who remains is like twenty — clearly the rookie. But the joke is on the other motherfuckers, because the prisoner is down to fuck. So Autumn gets all prison movie on him and keeps pushing her pussy up between the bars and grabbing her tits and fingering herself. Eventually she gets the cop to stick his dick between the bars and sucks it for a while, then turns around to take his meat in her snatch. The cop doesn’t give a tiny shit about how drunk or disorderly she is and starts to open the door, but Autumn is like FUCK THAT I WANT JAIL ASS and tells him to fuck her like six different ways, all of which are totally awkward. Then he blows a giant load on her face and in her hair.
The cop then lets her go. She came, so she’s quieter and more satisfied. She declines a ride and runs right back out into the woods, where the LARP dorks are still playing. She’s still got a face and hairdo full of jizz, so they declare her an “elf whore” and pretend to bludgeon her to death, thus ending her character’s life in the game. The story ends when Autumn recovers a dropped wizard’s staff and fucks it until she cums again, then wakes up sticky with some hobo watching her while eating beans from a can.
Of course the real story is nowhere near this ridiculous, but it’s also not especially funny. Maybe even sad.
A U G U S T 25
I GOT CAUGHT UP OVER the last few days and — horror! — failed to listen to the Self Publishing Podcast until two days after it was released. I felt like such a commoner. And of all weeks, too, since it was an episode that got me really excited. No, not like that.
The bulk of the episode was all about how to go from self-publication to getting an agent. It was interesting, but I don’t really want an agent for my stuff. But it did sort of redefine how the game has changed. Specifically, authors are now the ones in charge, and good authors who can build their own audiences and their own success hold a lot of power. Agents and publishers can now come to US.
But that’s not why I got excited. At the very end, their guest made a joke about maybe going into erotica, and the three hosts kind of jumped all over that, agreeing that, yeah, erotica was an interesting market, and that they should have an erotica author on. They were pro smut, not at all looking down on it. On the heels of the success of 50 Shades of Grey , the world has sorta started to open up about sex and even S&M, and the erotica market is now hard to ignore.
It made me proud — and, I’ll be honest, a little wet — to realize these guys I’ve been stalking are so open-minded about the smut market and even maybe interested in it. Johnny sounded like he almost wanted to write it, LOL.
Their talk about all of the “50 Shades” spinoffs (specifically 50 Shades of Alice in Wonderland ) also seemed serendipitous since I decided to release 50 Shades of Lexi Maxxwell .
I should write my thoughts on my 50 Shades before I forget the thoughts behind it, but I’m way too horny. Sam’s out tonight. Might be time to fire up my sex toy collection.
A U G U S T 26
OKAY, FOR THE RECORD, HERE’S the basics behind my own 50 Shades collection. First, I wrote 50 absolutely filthy stories (holy crap, how did I write 50 already? That’s insane!) and then I bundled them all together into this one massive collection that sells for $9.99. Everyone wins. I win because with Amazon’s 70% commission structure, I make $7 for each one I sell. (And damn well I should; I wrote it and 50 stories is a fuckload of writing time!) My awesome readers win because it’s a crazy amount of content and costs a lot less than the stories, which sell for 99 cents each, would cost if purchased
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