do. I understand your need for
anonymity, at least, for no one to find out what you're doing. You understand
my need for secrecy, too. We're not going to expose each other."
I watched out the window, not sure what I
thought about what he said. Part of me thought he was right. He would be very
careful. He understood.
"Look, I know you're worried about your
father finding out about your interest in BDSM," he said, his voice low.
"But I'm well-respected in my field and I don’t want to screw that up. If
people found out I frequent fetish nights and have submissives, it would hurt
my reputation. You want to learn about the lifestyle and understand
female submissives and male Dominants? I can help you. We can pretend to
be dating, and that way there'd be no reason that we couldn’t be seen together.
We wouldn’t have to make up excuses in case anyone found us together. I won't
do anything you don't want me to do. We can write it all out, formally in an
agreement, and I'll stick to it. The only way anything will happen is if you want it to and specifically negotiate for the agreement to change. I am an
honorable man in that respect. You can talk to Lara if you want
verification."
We drove along, and I said nothing. He was
right, of course. The cat was now out of the bag with us. Both of us knew each
other's inclinations, even if mine were purely for research purposes.
Lara said he was absolutely trustworthy.
"Drake, it's just…" I shook my head,
my cheeks hot. "I'm so embarrassed."
"I know." He reached out to take my
hand and squeezed it before I could pull it away. "How do you think I
feel? Your father actually likes me. You don't know how much that means
to me." Finally, he let go of my hand and glanced quickly at me.
I really didn’t know what to say.
"I know you and he don't really get along
well," Drake said softly. "But he's like the father I wish I’d
had. My own father was so self-absorbed and away from home so much that I
always felt as if I was just not important enough. He was always, 'Hey, I
love you man,' but I never felt it. If he had loved me, why was he always
away?"
He said nothing for a moment as we sat at a
stoplight. "Your father is maybe too involved in your life but as
someone who felt neglected, I envy you that. When I met your father at my dad's
funeral, he took me under his wing immediately because he and my dad were such
good friends. So, if he found out about me …" He shook his head.
"I've read some of his judgments. I know what he's like."
"And yet you like him."
"He's like a second father to me. He's
smart and competent and powerful and has so much history with my dad. And he likes me, Kate."
We arrived at my apartment and when the car
stopped I got out and started walking up the steps. He followed me quickly to
the door.
" Kate ." He took my arm and
tried to turn me to face him. "Don't run away. I want to talk. Straighten
this out between us."
"There's nothing to straighten out. We're
square, OK? Let's just go our separate ways."
As usual, someone had propped open the door to
the building so their cousin or uncle or homey could come in. I opened the door
and kicked the piece of cardboard aside that was holding it open, my hands
shaking just a bit. I went inside and of course, he followed me before the door
closed.
I glared at his chin. "You said you
wouldn't come in."
"You said you'd talk to me."
"I did."
" Kate …" He put his arm out and
stopped me before I reached the stairs, his hand on the wall. I stood there and
stared at the leather strap on his wrist.
I waited. He kept his arm like that.
"Are you really going to try to stop me
from going upstairs?"
"I want to keep talking."
"Is this what Dominants do? Always try to control
things?"
" Yes ." He exhaled heavily.
"I like control Kate. I'm a Dom. It's what I do."
I stood there staring at his arm, at that darned
leather strap with ornate carving in it.
"I'm listening."
"Write up an agreement, include anything
you
anonymity, at least, for no one to find out what you're doing. You understand
my need for secrecy, too. We're not going to expose each other."
I watched out the window, not sure what I
thought about what he said. Part of me thought he was right. He would be very
careful. He understood.
"Look, I know you're worried about your
father finding out about your interest in BDSM," he said, his voice low.
"But I'm well-respected in my field and I don’t want to screw that up. If
people found out I frequent fetish nights and have submissives, it would hurt
my reputation. You want to learn about the lifestyle and understand
female submissives and male Dominants? I can help you. We can pretend to
be dating, and that way there'd be no reason that we couldn’t be seen together.
We wouldn’t have to make up excuses in case anyone found us together. I won't
do anything you don't want me to do. We can write it all out, formally in an
agreement, and I'll stick to it. The only way anything will happen is if you want it to and specifically negotiate for the agreement to change. I am an
honorable man in that respect. You can talk to Lara if you want
verification."
We drove along, and I said nothing. He was
right, of course. The cat was now out of the bag with us. Both of us knew each
other's inclinations, even if mine were purely for research purposes.
Lara said he was absolutely trustworthy.
"Drake, it's just…" I shook my head,
my cheeks hot. "I'm so embarrassed."
"I know." He reached out to take my
hand and squeezed it before I could pull it away. "How do you think I
feel? Your father actually likes me. You don't know how much that means
to me." Finally, he let go of my hand and glanced quickly at me.
I really didn’t know what to say.
"I know you and he don't really get along
well," Drake said softly. "But he's like the father I wish I’d
had. My own father was so self-absorbed and away from home so much that I
always felt as if I was just not important enough. He was always, 'Hey, I
love you man,' but I never felt it. If he had loved me, why was he always
away?"
He said nothing for a moment as we sat at a
stoplight. "Your father is maybe too involved in your life but as
someone who felt neglected, I envy you that. When I met your father at my dad's
funeral, he took me under his wing immediately because he and my dad were such
good friends. So, if he found out about me …" He shook his head.
"I've read some of his judgments. I know what he's like."
"And yet you like him."
"He's like a second father to me. He's
smart and competent and powerful and has so much history with my dad. And he likes me, Kate."
We arrived at my apartment and when the car
stopped I got out and started walking up the steps. He followed me quickly to
the door.
" Kate ." He took my arm and
tried to turn me to face him. "Don't run away. I want to talk. Straighten
this out between us."
"There's nothing to straighten out. We're
square, OK? Let's just go our separate ways."
As usual, someone had propped open the door to
the building so their cousin or uncle or homey could come in. I opened the door
and kicked the piece of cardboard aside that was holding it open, my hands
shaking just a bit. I went inside and of course, he followed me before the door
closed.
I glared at his chin. "You said you
wouldn't come in."
"You said you'd talk to me."
"I did."
" Kate …" He put his arm out and
stopped me before I reached the stairs, his hand on the wall. I stood there and
stared at the leather strap on his wrist.
I waited. He kept his arm like that.
"Are you really going to try to stop me
from going upstairs?"
"I want to keep talking."
"Is this what Dominants do? Always try to control
things?"
" Yes ." He exhaled heavily.
"I like control Kate. I'm a Dom. It's what I do."
I stood there staring at his arm, at that darned
leather strap with ornate carving in it.
"I'm listening."
"Write up an agreement, include anything
you
Similar Books
