Tantric Sex for Men: Making Love a Meditation by Diana Richardson Page A

SHARING

    My Body Keeps Me Honest
During lovemaking, my body lets me know if I am touching from my heart. I became aware of it when I was lying in bed with my wife in a close embrace one morning. With my right hand I was touching her skin, which felt warm and soft, and in contrast I experienced my hand as stiff, wooden, and lifeless. All of a sudden it came into my consciousness: “You are not touching your woman with your heart.” That’s why my hand felt so dull. When I thought about why this was so, I realized I felt trapped in my old pattern of not getting enough. The root of this pattern is not love, openness, and trust, which explains why my hand did not feel loving, trusting, and open. I decided to watch my hand as I shifted my attention away from the pattern to a deep and relaxed presence toward myself. Very swiftly my sensation of my hand changed. My hand softened, became alive, and was gently tingling. Immediately the breath was flowing through my hand and became one with my whole body. My hand was reconnected, and I was again able to touch from the heart. I was aware of the whole and no longer focused on my pattern. This experience taught me what is most important when touching my wife: relaxed, loving presence toward myself. So every touch is a delight and a touch of my heart.

 
     
Tantric Inspiration
If you can go on growing in this intimacy, which is no more excitement, then the joy will arise: first excitement, then love, then joy. Joy is the ultimate product, the fulfillment. Excitement is just a beginning, a triggering; it is not the end. And those who finish at excitement will never know what love is, will never know the mystery of love, will never know the joy of love. They will know sensations, excitement, passionate fever, but they will never know the grace that is love. They will never know how beautiful it is to be with a person with no excitement but with silence, with no words, with no effort to do anything. Just being together, sharing one space, one being, sharing each other, not thinking of what to do, what to say, where to go, how to enjoy; all those things are gone. The storm is over and there is silence.
And it is not that you will not make love but it will not be a making really; it will be a love happening. It will happen out of grace, out of silence, out of rhythm; it will arise from your depths, it will not be bodily really. There is a sex which is spiritual, which has nothing to do with the body. Although the body partakes in it, participates in it, it is not the source of it. Then sex takes on the color of Tantra, only then.
OSHO, TRANSCRIBED TEACHINGS,
LET GO!: A DARSHAN DIARY

7
    DATES, FOREPLAY, KISSING, AND POSITIONS

     
     
    MAKE LOVE DATES
    Knowing you are going to have sex can really be a big turn-on. Nothing beats looking at your diary and seeing that from 6 to 9 p.m. tonight you have an appointment with your partner—to make love! You know that today, for sure, it’s going to happen, which is not generally guaranteed under ordinary circumstances. How many times does your woman brush you aside before she lets you be close? Several years ago there was a story about the famous musician, Sting, and although we don’t know whether or not it’s true, it makes the point about women’s general lack of availability in a humorous way. According to the story, Sting made a comment to the press about his sex life, making himself almost as famous for this as for his music. His claim that he had made love for six hours or so caused an international stir. Some weeks later, or so the story goes, he clarified his statement by explaining that five of the six hours had consisted of begging.
    Initially, setting a fixed time for sex may seem somewhat strange, because we have the idea that sex ought to be spontaneous—without preparation or premeditation. In fact, sex is rarely truly spontaneous, but happens more on an accidental or habitual basis. Sexual thoughts accompany man throughout