Tainted by Cyndi Goodgame

me.
    “Park?”
    “Um...Grace lingo.  I am trying to clean up my thinking so the court doesn’t think me rude and inappropriate.”
    His sardonic laugh surfaced, “Crap backwards is still crap, Grace.”
    I shrugged.  I didn’t care about his thoughts on this.  I’d heard his colorful language before.  “Since the Fey people feel like it’s a right of passage to have an invasion of thoughts I figured I better change my slang to something more coded and less offensive.”
    He didn’t move.  The smirk arose in his mouth. I don’t know why, but he wasn't leaving.
    “And you want me to leave?”
    I do have something to ask Mr. Duty.  “You can go where you like.” I was trying to not be obvious, but I searched for a reason why I didn’t sense him.  In fact, I hadn’t sensed Ian either.  Are you here to “keep an eye on me” since it’s your duty?
    “Fine.  I’ll stay.”  He wasn’t faltered in the least.  You look amazing today.
    I turned quickly forcing my feet to retreat to the daggers target practice opposite his direction.  I quite enjoyed them last time.  I picked up one to start.  Missed.  Why can’t I block you Pike as much as the rest?
    The target bounced.  And then another and another one did the same. 
    I stepped back to throw another not knowing if Pike had stayed or not.  Stayed!
    A hand folded against my arm.  I felt him step close to me with only the touch of his hand.   I didn’t make a sound.  Or move.  I felt him breathe me in.  The extra dash of lavender wasn’t meant for him.
    “Why did you save me that day at the picnic tables? With Kin?”
    “Grace, you know the answer to that question.” 
    Yeah, but he won’t say it out loud. “Why were you rude and mean and spitting everywhere when I found out the boy I knew as Christian was you.”
    “You need to flip only your wrist.  Nothing more.”  He flipped my hand up and down to demonstrate then released it.  I followed through and made the dagger hit almost near the center of the target.  You are…
    “Very good.”
    I was so excited to finally hit the target I jumped mercilessly in the air and landed a step closer to him than I gauged.  He caught me falling backwards.  Ever the protector and the smooth talker and the Casanova.  He was so cruel in the past.
    “My lady,” he whispered close to my ear.  His hand reached around and pulled the pendant free of my gown that I had secretly tucked back just before I threw the last dagger.  It now hung swaying back and forth in front of me.  I gasped looking up at him.  Bad, bad mistake.
    Because I didn’t think I had a chance.  You cannot deny how you feel. 
    I can!  And I will! I don’t think this is the kind of feelings you think I have.  Mostly, you make me nervous and that’s it.  Quit reading it like it’s something else. I couldn’t look away.  My heart was fluttering wildly.
    Yes, you can.  You choose what you want, no one else.
    I CAN’T! I screamed inside.  I saw a sprig of something tucked into Pike’s pockets.  Why does he have plants in his—
    He pushed his lips against mine.  I responded.   At least two quick seconds went by.  I backed up from him pushing against the rail, my hands grabbing hold.  “Don’t Pike.  Just don’t do this.”
    “Tell me why not?”
    “No!”  I left running straight to my room.   Why?  Why?  Why?
    I cried for an hour at least.  No one came to check on me.  No one came at all.  No one.  Not even Danella. I didn’t ask for it.  He didn't make sense.  I don't have any feelings for him.
    I surfaced, cleaned my face, and headed to dinner.  I was starving but my head was pounding larger than the pangs of my stomach.  I found Ian at the table.  It was a small comfort but only just.  He never came and found me earlier.  Is it because he knew?
    I sat down waiting for him to rise as he always did when I entered.  The room rose and once again sat, but this time it seemed as though