begins to protest, pulling away from me. I catch her by her belt loops and drag her back to me but the moment we were having is gone. I’d normally be upset but I think in this case the seriousness is what is needed.
“I know,” I assure her. “I just want you to know that I won’t hurt you like he did. I want to protect you. For you want me like I want you.”
She sighs, leaning back into me, right where I want her but I can tell the wheels in her head are turning and trying to talk her out of this. “I have baggage. Two kids and all the shit with Max… I don’t think I’ll ever understand why you want to be part of this.”
I growl and she notices the change in my demeanor when she brings up that shit. Her fingers drift over my face, soothing me. It’s the only thing keeping me from leaving and finding him so I can kill the motherfucker.
“Willow and Sage are not baggage. They’re part of a package deal with you. In case you haven’t noticed, it’s a pretty great fuckin’ package that I’ve gotten attached to.”
She stares at me for a second before pressing her forehead against mine. “As much as I know deep inside me that this is something I want, I don’t think it’s a good idea. With everything going on with Max, and the fact that I’m not fully divorced right now, it’s just not. And I know the second the press gets wind of it it’ll spread like wildfire.”
I sigh, happy because she said that she wanted to be with me, but upset that she doesn’t think it’s a good idea. I need her and it’s making me insane that I can’t have her. “I can’t change how I feel about you, Payton. I couldn’t stop wanting you just because of everything going on even if I tried. If tonight did anything, it made me want you more. Now that I know how good it feels to touch you, all I can think about is doing it again.”
Payton smiles and starts to say something but my phone vibrates in my pocket against her leg. I reach in and pull it out. All I want to do is shut it off and toss it to the side so we won’t get interrupted again and that’s what I plan to do, but the second I see the name I know something is wrong.
I swipe my screen and answer it as quickly as I can. “Willow, what’s wrong?”
Payton’s eyes widen and she tries to climb off my lap but I hold her in place until I know what is going on.
Willow sniffles on the other end of the line. “AJ, my mom’s not answering her phone. Is she there with you?”
I tuck a piece of hair behind Payton’s ear, trying everything I can to keep the connection between us. “She’s right here. What’s the matter?”
“I just,” she whispers, trying to get her words out. “I just need my mom. Can you tell her to come get me, please?”
“I’ll make her leave right now. Are you all right?” I ask even though I’m not sure she will answer me.
“Yes. No. Nothing is all right anymore, AJ. I just want everything to go back to normal. I was starting to feel better, but I got in my own head I guess.” Her voice goes quiet, almost like she’s afraid someone will hear her. “I just need my mom.”
“OK, she’s on her way. And, Willow?”
“Yeah,” she squeaks.
“If you ever need anything, anything at all, don’t ever hesitate to call me.”
She rushes out some jumbled up words and hangs up the phone.
Payton looks panicked but I still have a hold of her so she can’t run away just yet. I know I need to let her leave, but I really, really, don’t want her to go.
“Kiss me.”
“Tell me what’s wrong with Willow,” she counters.
I shake my head. “Kiss me first, and then I’ll tell you. Because I need to know you believe that I’m not like Max and that everything tonight wasn’t a fluke.”
She wants to pull away, I can see it in her eyes, but she doesn’t. Payton’s lips slide over mine. Gently at first and then with more determination. She kisses me until I pull away, which says more to me than her words ever
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