didn’t mean I wasn’t scared. It’s a natural thing for a woman to be frightened of marriage. We’re giving ourselves into a man’s care, hoping that he’ll be kind and that he’ll provide for us, knowing there’s little to be done if he turns out to be something much less than we’d hoped.”
“If you’re trying to reassure me, you’re going the wrong way about it,” Eleanor said.
“All I’m trying to do is make you understand that your fears are natural. I think Mr. McLain will make you a fine husband and I’m spiteful enough to like the idea that you’re not only marrying before Anabel, but marrying so well. That will put the little cat’s nose out of joint for some time to come.”
“I can’t marry just to spite Anabel,” Eleanor protested with a laugh.
“No, but you might as well enjoy it.” Letty’s grin faded, her expression becoming more serious. “Has your aunt talked to you about your marital duties?”
Eleanor flushed and dropped her eyes to her lap. Not even with Letty could she be comfortable discussing such a personal topic.
“She said that there would be ‘things’ my husband would want to do, and that I would have to learn to endure them and to close my eyes and pray that they’d soon be over,” she admitted in a whisper. Remembering Aunt Dorinda’s solemn expression, she felt a shiver of dread go up her spine.
“What a lackwit,” Letty snapped. “More likely, in this household, it’s your uncle who’s had to learn to endure,” she muttered, half to herself. But Eleanor heard and was surprised to find herself giggling at the thought of her uncle being led, all unwilling, to his marriage bed.
“That’s better.” Letty took Eleanor’s hands and drew her up off the hard little stool. “Come sit with me on the bed and I’ll tell you what it’s really like between a man and a woman.”
Eleanor followed her, torn between curiosity and dread. She wasn’t at all sure she wanted to know what happened between a man and wife, not when she was halfway to believing that she couldn’t possibly go through with the marriage.
Eleanor stared at the gold band on her finger. It looked new and shiny and felt strangely heavy. She twisted it around her finger as if seeking a more comfortable position for it.
“Is it too big?” Luke’s husky question made her jump, her head jerking toward him.
“Too big?”
“The ring.” He nodded to the band she was still twisting. “Is it too big?”
“Oh, no.” She forced herself to stop toying with the ring. “No, it’s fine.”
“I could have it made smaller,” he offered. He took his eyes off the road and looked at her.
“No, really. It’s fine. I guess I’m just a little nervous,” she admitted.
“So am I.” Luke grinned at her look of surprise. “First time I’ve been married.”
“Me, too.” Eleanor returned his smile, feeling a little of her tension ease. She didn’t believe for a minute that he was nervous, but it was kind of him to pretend. Since he’d returned his gaze to the road, she allowed herself to glance sideways at him.
My husband. Thinking the words didn’t make them seem real, any more than the wedding ring on her finger or the fact that he was taking her to the home they’d now be sharing. She’d stood in church and repeated her vows, heard him do the same, accepted the congratulations of the guests, changed from her wedding gown with Letty’s help and left her uncle’s house forever and she still couldn’t make herself believe in the reality of what she’d done this day.
She’d been almost surprised to see Luke waiting for her at the church, so sure had she been that he’d have realized what a terrible mistake he’d made in asking her to marry him. Once she saw that he was there, she’d wished he hadn’t come. Better to be jilted with an impersonal note than to receive the news that he didn’t want her after all with the whole town looking on. But he’d only stood there on
“If you’re trying to reassure me, you’re going the wrong way about it,” Eleanor said.
“All I’m trying to do is make you understand that your fears are natural. I think Mr. McLain will make you a fine husband and I’m spiteful enough to like the idea that you’re not only marrying before Anabel, but marrying so well. That will put the little cat’s nose out of joint for some time to come.”
“I can’t marry just to spite Anabel,” Eleanor protested with a laugh.
“No, but you might as well enjoy it.” Letty’s grin faded, her expression becoming more serious. “Has your aunt talked to you about your marital duties?”
Eleanor flushed and dropped her eyes to her lap. Not even with Letty could she be comfortable discussing such a personal topic.
“She said that there would be ‘things’ my husband would want to do, and that I would have to learn to endure them and to close my eyes and pray that they’d soon be over,” she admitted in a whisper. Remembering Aunt Dorinda’s solemn expression, she felt a shiver of dread go up her spine.
“What a lackwit,” Letty snapped. “More likely, in this household, it’s your uncle who’s had to learn to endure,” she muttered, half to herself. But Eleanor heard and was surprised to find herself giggling at the thought of her uncle being led, all unwilling, to his marriage bed.
“That’s better.” Letty took Eleanor’s hands and drew her up off the hard little stool. “Come sit with me on the bed and I’ll tell you what it’s really like between a man and a woman.”
Eleanor followed her, torn between curiosity and dread. She wasn’t at all sure she wanted to know what happened between a man and wife, not when she was halfway to believing that she couldn’t possibly go through with the marriage.
Eleanor stared at the gold band on her finger. It looked new and shiny and felt strangely heavy. She twisted it around her finger as if seeking a more comfortable position for it.
“Is it too big?” Luke’s husky question made her jump, her head jerking toward him.
“Too big?”
“The ring.” He nodded to the band she was still twisting. “Is it too big?”
“Oh, no.” She forced herself to stop toying with the ring. “No, it’s fine.”
“I could have it made smaller,” he offered. He took his eyes off the road and looked at her.
“No, really. It’s fine. I guess I’m just a little nervous,” she admitted.
“So am I.” Luke grinned at her look of surprise. “First time I’ve been married.”
“Me, too.” Eleanor returned his smile, feeling a little of her tension ease. She didn’t believe for a minute that he was nervous, but it was kind of him to pretend. Since he’d returned his gaze to the road, she allowed herself to glance sideways at him.
My husband. Thinking the words didn’t make them seem real, any more than the wedding ring on her finger or the fact that he was taking her to the home they’d now be sharing. She’d stood in church and repeated her vows, heard him do the same, accepted the congratulations of the guests, changed from her wedding gown with Letty’s help and left her uncle’s house forever and she still couldn’t make herself believe in the reality of what she’d done this day.
She’d been almost surprised to see Luke waiting for her at the church, so sure had she been that he’d have realized what a terrible mistake he’d made in asking her to marry him. Once she saw that he was there, she’d wished he hadn’t come. Better to be jilted with an impersonal note than to receive the news that he didn’t want her after all with the whole town looking on. But he’d only stood there on
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