Scurvy Goonda by Chris McCoy Page A

Greeks!” said another.
    “Allow me to be candid and practical for a moment,” said Persephone. “There’s no more space in Middlemost. We’re running out of food. We’re running out of materials to build cities. Billions of ab-coms have come here since humans first figured out how to walk upright, and because of the call to arms, there are billions more of us here as we speak.
    “Now think about
Earth
. What’s going on there? Wars. Global warming. Climate change. Droughts. Famine. The humans don’t
deserve
what’s left of the world they have. They’re heading for a meltdown. Disease! Species extinction! The melting of the ice caps! But
we
could save the Earth, friends.
We
have lived there, and we know how precious it is.
We
could restore
balance!
The Earth
needs
us, we need a new home, and all that is standingin our way are the humans who threw each and every one of us away like
garbage
!”
    Cries of “Hear! Hear!” and “Garbage, indeed!” rang out from the senators.
    “Southern California is mine!”
    “I get the Croatian coastline!”
    “I’ll take all of England, except for Essex!”
    “Now, now, let’s not divide up the world
before
it is ours,” said Persephone. “First things first—as you know, an eighty-five-percent vote is necessary to overturn the nonviolence law. I propose that we make a
statement
today, and overturn it with one hundred percent of the vote. A vote for a fight is a vote
for
the future—”
    “HAVE YOU LOST YOUR MIND, PERSEPHONE?” boomed a voice from the back of the chamber.
    Persephone paused, astounded.
    “Who? Said? That?” she asked.
    “
I
did,” said the voice, which was now getting closer. Persephone saw an ancient double-pouched kangaroo bouncing ponderously down the red-carpeted center aisle of the chamber, his multicolored tail dragging behind.
    “Senator Thip-Thap,” said Persephone. He was her old mentor.
    “You’ve disappointed me, Persephone,” said Senator Thip-Thap.
    When Persephone had first arrived in Middlemost, she’d had a difficult time adjusting to her new environment. She was lonely. Senator Thip-Thap took her in and gave her a home and friendship during her first couple of centuries there. She served as a clerk in his office, learning the basics ofgovernment, before starting her political career in earnest. She knew that she owed much of her success to Senator Thip-Thap—who was now staring at her, shaking angrily.
    “You should be ashamed of yourself!” said Senator Thip-Thap. “Spewing a message of violence. It got you into office because you earned the votes of fools, but it must
stop here.”
    Nervous chattering from the audience.
    “Your colleagues seem to disagree,” said Persephone.
    “Yes, you were cast aside,” said Senator Thip-Thap, turning to the Senate chamber. “
All
of you were cast aside! But we’ve seen what violence does to humans, and we
know
that it is always a mistake! And now you want to take up arms against them? You want to
eradicate
them from their own world?”
    Senator Thip-Thap slammed his cane into the ground.
    “The humans who abandoned you were CHILDREN!” he exploded. “Children who didn’t know any better because they were
young
. I
implore
you—forget this madness, and find another way to preserve Middlemost
without
violence.”
    There was silence in the Senate chamber.
    “It’s rude to interrupt your president when she is speaking,” said Persephone. “Would the officer of the court please have Senator Thip-Thap taken to a comfortable place where he can
lie down?
He’s quite old, and not quite sane.”
    “Of course, President Skeleton,” said the court proboscis monkey, lumbering toward Senator Thip-Thap, who stared at Persephone.
    “And you wonder why nobody loves you,” said Senator Thip-Thap.
    “I HAVE THE LOVE OF A
WORLD,”
she snapped.
“Out
with this shoddy antique!”
    The court monkey grabbed Senator Thip-Thap and dragged him out of the Senate chamber while the rest