Crinkle , watching him as he walked back to his resistance pals.
“ Yeah , yeah , whatever ,” said Pete.
“ Right then my little Renegades ,” started Slip , “ it’s high time we were deep inside everybody’s minds. Back to the Humdinger gang , the past beckons !”
16.
Fendel and Pierre mad e their way through the fiery ruins of Krassis. In this reality, the Co-leen had taken their dislike of other species to an entirely new level, having made extinct all other forms of sentient life, all that is, were it not for the Co-leen resistance leader Pierre . Fendel was feeling quite un - amused by the scale of destruction he was witnes sing, and walking past the umpteenth burned and mutilated structure, thought he would find out if Pierre had some idea as to what a next course of action might entail.
“ So Pierre , ” he began , “ how did you escape the Co-leen? ”
“ Ah well, my little friend, ” said Pierre drawing on a cigarette as he spoke , “ the Co-leen may be clever, and powerful, but they made one crucial mistake when it came to me. ”
“ Oh? ” he queried .
“ Why yes, ” replied Pierre flicking his gittane away , “ the Co-leen came to Krassis quite recently you know , and it was here that a large battle took place. Many seasons in and we thought that the war could still go either way. We still had some tricks up our sleeves, and we were expecting to be reinforced any day. ”
“ What happened then? ”
“ The Burn, ” answered the Frenchman .
“ The Burn? ”
“ Something that should never have been allowed to exist, by anyone’s standards! ”
The Burn was an experimental technology that took advantage of a new development in chaos physics. Chaos physics attempted to explain the inherent laws of the universe by introducing elements of randomness into everyday science. So where it was universally understood that mass could be explained by sitting in a bath and watching the displacement of the water. Chaos physics went on to say that were the bath instead made of wheat, and filled instead with ambivalence, and rather than getting in the bath you sketch it using a hammer, then the resulting science, though certainly weirder, was actually a pretty fair summary of a universal law. The Burn was a quite unexpected result when some chaos physicists got together and decided to introduce some dark energy, and balloons in a particle accelerator. The resulting fission created an atom so evil, that it made Hit ler look like he had a pretty decent shot at a posthumous Nobel peace prize . This atom was then placed in conventional missiles, and the resulting explosions , would quite literally burn away a planet.
“ Sounds serious, ” he remarked , perhaps a little too casually.
“ It is serious, ” said Pierre , “ so serious in fact , that they have used this Burn to destroy almost all intelligent life, all that is were it not for you and I, my little chickadee. ”
“ Then how did you escape? ”
“ Well then my little pastry puff, they had me cornered not too far from this very spot, I had been hiding out in a disused water hockey rink. When they came upon me, I had only one option left available to me. ”
“ Which was? ” asked Fendel, wide-eyed.
“ I will show you, ” said Pierre undoing his trouser fly as he spoke.
“ No, no, it’s quite alright! ” he said alarmed .
“ But I insist, my ch er r y pie, you must realize the truth of this! ” said Pierre removing his trousers in one practiced movement.
Fendel’s eyes were now firmly closed, refusing as he was to register the Frenchman’s immediate truth.
“ Hold out your hand, and prepared to be amazed! ” insisted Pierre .
“ No thanks, must rush, got to see a dog about a man and all that, ” he said wishing he still had his emergency teleport belt buckle .
“ Open your eyes and behold my magnificence! ” demanded the Frenchman .
Now sure, he was certainly no prude, and
“ Yeah , yeah , whatever ,” said Pete.
“ Right then my little Renegades ,” started Slip , “ it’s high time we were deep inside everybody’s minds. Back to the Humdinger gang , the past beckons !”
16.
Fendel and Pierre mad e their way through the fiery ruins of Krassis. In this reality, the Co-leen had taken their dislike of other species to an entirely new level, having made extinct all other forms of sentient life, all that is, were it not for the Co-leen resistance leader Pierre . Fendel was feeling quite un - amused by the scale of destruction he was witnes sing, and walking past the umpteenth burned and mutilated structure, thought he would find out if Pierre had some idea as to what a next course of action might entail.
“ So Pierre , ” he began , “ how did you escape the Co-leen? ”
“ Ah well, my little friend, ” said Pierre drawing on a cigarette as he spoke , “ the Co-leen may be clever, and powerful, but they made one crucial mistake when it came to me. ”
“ Oh? ” he queried .
“ Why yes, ” replied Pierre flicking his gittane away , “ the Co-leen came to Krassis quite recently you know , and it was here that a large battle took place. Many seasons in and we thought that the war could still go either way. We still had some tricks up our sleeves, and we were expecting to be reinforced any day. ”
“ What happened then? ”
“ The Burn, ” answered the Frenchman .
“ The Burn? ”
“ Something that should never have been allowed to exist, by anyone’s standards! ”
The Burn was an experimental technology that took advantage of a new development in chaos physics. Chaos physics attempted to explain the inherent laws of the universe by introducing elements of randomness into everyday science. So where it was universally understood that mass could be explained by sitting in a bath and watching the displacement of the water. Chaos physics went on to say that were the bath instead made of wheat, and filled instead with ambivalence, and rather than getting in the bath you sketch it using a hammer, then the resulting science, though certainly weirder, was actually a pretty fair summary of a universal law. The Burn was a quite unexpected result when some chaos physicists got together and decided to introduce some dark energy, and balloons in a particle accelerator. The resulting fission created an atom so evil, that it made Hit ler look like he had a pretty decent shot at a posthumous Nobel peace prize . This atom was then placed in conventional missiles, and the resulting explosions , would quite literally burn away a planet.
“ Sounds serious, ” he remarked , perhaps a little too casually.
“ It is serious, ” said Pierre , “ so serious in fact , that they have used this Burn to destroy almost all intelligent life, all that is were it not for you and I, my little chickadee. ”
“ Then how did you escape? ”
“ Well then my little pastry puff, they had me cornered not too far from this very spot, I had been hiding out in a disused water hockey rink. When they came upon me, I had only one option left available to me. ”
“ Which was? ” asked Fendel, wide-eyed.
“ I will show you, ” said Pierre undoing his trouser fly as he spoke.
“ No, no, it’s quite alright! ” he said alarmed .
“ But I insist, my ch er r y pie, you must realize the truth of this! ” said Pierre removing his trousers in one practiced movement.
Fendel’s eyes were now firmly closed, refusing as he was to register the Frenchman’s immediate truth.
“ Hold out your hand, and prepared to be amazed! ” insisted Pierre .
“ No thanks, must rush, got to see a dog about a man and all that, ” he said wishing he still had his emergency teleport belt buckle .
“ Open your eyes and behold my magnificence! ” demanded the Frenchman .
Now sure, he was certainly no prude, and
Similar Books
