composed man. I can barely keep myself together in my business meetings, because suddenly my thoughts turn to you, and then I am transported to a world where we share our thoughts and then make love. I’ve had lovers who entertained me at the dinner table but lacked in the bedroom. In turn, I’ve had lovers who were everything I wanted in bed, but bored me to tears outside of it. I believe you could be both good things and so much more.
“I don’t mean to put pressure on you. It’s how I honestly feel. The sense I get from you is unlike anything I have ever felt before. Rarely does a woman make me feel the rush of lust and the intrigue of a new friend at the same time. It’s usually one or the other. It’s funny, because I’ve never considered myself a man with a physical type. I’ve found all sorts of women physically beautiful. After knowing you as I do now, however, I can safely say that I think you are my type. Should I never see you again, I would want to eventually find a woman who matches you. Not to replace you, but because I can’t imagine finding any other woman attractive than one who looks like you.
“Is that a strange thing to say? I’m sure it came out the wrong way. I’m sorry, Monica, but when it comes to talking to you, I discover that I suddenly lose my vocabulary and write the arguments of a university freshman who has yet to learn what a thesis statement is. Did I ever tell you that I have an uncle who is a professor at Harvard?
“I, too, look forward to our correspondences. I feel like a kid waiting for the mail every day. Your words, although they do not tell me what I wish to hear, make my evening. I go to sleep thinking of them, and in the morning I am rested after only having good dreams.”
“I hope your business is doing well, and I hope that Sam isn’t giving you any trouble.
“Henry.”
***
“I disgust myself with how much I think of you.”
***
“I see you decided to email me. I miss your beautiful handwriting, but this feels delightfully direct.”
***
“I’m serious, Henry. I’ve become an unnatural creature. You appear in my thoughts even when you have no business doing so. Tonight we had a full house, with a party in almost every room and my girls working themselves dead. I could hear one of them with her patron when I passed by her room. I don’t know what he was doing to her, but I could only imagine. Fucking her, I suppose. Whatever it was, she genuinely enjoyed it. I know the difference between her patron placating moans and her real ones. The longer I idled there, listening like a pervert, the more I thought of you and my desire to have you. I almost feel inhuman.”
***
“And if I were there, what would you have me do?”
***
“No, that’s not how it works. You’re the one who decides.”
***
“What would I do to you? I’d begin by tying your wrists together, and then blindfold you until all you can rely on are your ears and the top of your skin. I’d disrobe you, moving my hands over your body, exploring every inch of your curves until I know you in ways I never imagined.”
***
“And then?”
***
“And then I would bend you over my knee and test your limits for that kind of pain. You’d cry out, but I think you would like it, yes?”
***
“I do love a good spanking. Then what?”
***
“I wouldn’t go easy on you, not even the first time. I want to deny myself as much as I want to deny you. I’ll take you to the brink of release again and again, making you beg until I can’t stand it anymore. When I finally unleash myself upon you…”
***
“For God’s sake, what?”
***
“Use your imagination.”
***
Monica didn’t want to use her imagination anymore. She was tired of tossing and turning every night, losing sleep because all she could think about amounted to one of two men. She already dreamed of Jackson every
“I don’t mean to put pressure on you. It’s how I honestly feel. The sense I get from you is unlike anything I have ever felt before. Rarely does a woman make me feel the rush of lust and the intrigue of a new friend at the same time. It’s usually one or the other. It’s funny, because I’ve never considered myself a man with a physical type. I’ve found all sorts of women physically beautiful. After knowing you as I do now, however, I can safely say that I think you are my type. Should I never see you again, I would want to eventually find a woman who matches you. Not to replace you, but because I can’t imagine finding any other woman attractive than one who looks like you.
“Is that a strange thing to say? I’m sure it came out the wrong way. I’m sorry, Monica, but when it comes to talking to you, I discover that I suddenly lose my vocabulary and write the arguments of a university freshman who has yet to learn what a thesis statement is. Did I ever tell you that I have an uncle who is a professor at Harvard?
“I, too, look forward to our correspondences. I feel like a kid waiting for the mail every day. Your words, although they do not tell me what I wish to hear, make my evening. I go to sleep thinking of them, and in the morning I am rested after only having good dreams.”
“I hope your business is doing well, and I hope that Sam isn’t giving you any trouble.
“Henry.”
***
“I disgust myself with how much I think of you.”
***
“I see you decided to email me. I miss your beautiful handwriting, but this feels delightfully direct.”
***
“I’m serious, Henry. I’ve become an unnatural creature. You appear in my thoughts even when you have no business doing so. Tonight we had a full house, with a party in almost every room and my girls working themselves dead. I could hear one of them with her patron when I passed by her room. I don’t know what he was doing to her, but I could only imagine. Fucking her, I suppose. Whatever it was, she genuinely enjoyed it. I know the difference between her patron placating moans and her real ones. The longer I idled there, listening like a pervert, the more I thought of you and my desire to have you. I almost feel inhuman.”
***
“And if I were there, what would you have me do?”
***
“No, that’s not how it works. You’re the one who decides.”
***
“What would I do to you? I’d begin by tying your wrists together, and then blindfold you until all you can rely on are your ears and the top of your skin. I’d disrobe you, moving my hands over your body, exploring every inch of your curves until I know you in ways I never imagined.”
***
“And then?”
***
“And then I would bend you over my knee and test your limits for that kind of pain. You’d cry out, but I think you would like it, yes?”
***
“I do love a good spanking. Then what?”
***
“I wouldn’t go easy on you, not even the first time. I want to deny myself as much as I want to deny you. I’ll take you to the brink of release again and again, making you beg until I can’t stand it anymore. When I finally unleash myself upon you…”
***
“For God’s sake, what?”
***
“Use your imagination.”
***
Monica didn’t want to use her imagination anymore. She was tired of tossing and turning every night, losing sleep because all she could think about amounted to one of two men. She already dreamed of Jackson every
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