Protective Love (Hidden Secrets) by P.J. Belden

help.  I don’t need to be babysat.”
    “I am staying with yo u, Kayla.  At least while they’re here, then I need to get a hold of my agent and let him know a family emergency came up.  Are you okay with me staying with you?” Mary asked.
    “Yes, of course.  I would actually enjoy it.  It might even end up being like old times and really get my mind off things.” 
    I smiled and meant it for the first time in a long time.
    It wasn’t the brightest smile, but it was a smile nonetheless.  I felt better having told everyone, but at the same time it felt as if I was being consumed by support.  I wasn’t complaining, but I had been doing this all alone for so long, and suddenly they were concerned if I took a deep breath.  It was a lot to get used to.  For the life of me, I could never find a single reason - aside from fear - for why I stayed quiet for so long.  My family had always been there for one another and would never have turned their back on me when I needed them.
    Alex was just that scary and unpredictable.  Each attack was worse than the last , and I was scared shitless during each one.  The last one was the worst it had ever been.  I worried that if there was a next time, I may not survive it.
    A knock on the door brought me back to the present.  I looked up and there he was - Jason Gold.  There hadn’t been a day in my life that I looked at a man and pictured a good time, yet there I was, imagining his bare chest and running my hands up and down it.  The room felt warm all of a sudden.  He smiled then, and I had to sit down in a chair.  That smile could melt ice in Antarctica, especially when his dimples came out.
    I hoped that if there was anyone in the world, I could trust right then, it would be him.  But, sadly I knew I couldn’t let my guard down just yet.  At the end of the day, he was still a man, and men in my life did not have a very good track record.  He would be working against sixteen years of abuse to get me to trust him; the odds were not in his favor.
    “Ms. Williams, is this a good time?”
    I nodded.  “Yes.  My sister is outside making a call at the moment, but my brothers are here.”
    We all sat down at the table and again Jason sat across from me.  My brothers of course sat or stood around me.  I wanted to scream for them to back off, but I stayed quiet and focused on Jason.  It was almost as nerve-wracking to focus on Jason.  Part of me was screaming for him to go away, and another was screaming for him to kiss me.
    How could I possibly want that after everything?  How could I want two completely different things?  I think I am officially losing my mind.  That has to be it.
    “I’m losing my fucking mind around him…”
    “Around who?” Eli asked.
    “Huh?  What?”
    “Who are you losing you r mind around?”
    Without realizing what I was doing, I looked at Jason and dropped my eyes to my lap.  There was no doubt in my mind that I was bright freaking red.  Without lifting my head, I peeked up at Jason to see if he caught me.  He seemed to be fighting a smile, and I knew that what I thought I said in my head was really out loud, and everyone had heard me.  It was so mortifying. 
    “No one, don’t worry about it ,” I mumbled.
    Jason clear ed his throat.
    “There -” he started, then cleared his throat again.  “There are precautions we are going to be taking to make sure we have ears, even when we are not there.  This means bugging your apartment.  Now, the audio surveillance is not optional, but in the common areas or areas where he may get in, I would like to place video surveillance as well.  This would allow us to track how he gets in, what he does while he’s there, and if he’s still there before you walk into the apartment.”
    “What?”  I asked, astonished.
    “Kay, don’t … they are doing what they need to do to…”
    “To what?” I yelled as I stood up , knocking my chair into Eli.  “To take away even more