my sleeve and brought it downstairs to show the Mad Cow. (I don’t want to think about what he was doing with it!) The MC was less than horrified. She said there’s probably nothing unhealthy about it (there is for ME!), and that Sigmund will “have a word with Justin”. Well, that should help. (Sigmund never has less than a thousand words with anyone, and Justin will stop listening completely after “talk to you”.) And also she refuses to buy me a new bra. She says I’m being melodramatic and I should just wash it. She says it probably just got mixed up in the laundry, which is another good reason why we should each do our own. I may have to burn it.
There must be more to Willow’s picking-wild-sage-when-the-moon-is-full routine than I thought. The swelling’s gone down and my nose has stopped aching.
Disha was suitably AGHAST when I told her what Geek Boy did. She says it just proves that you never really know anyone, not even the people who are closest to you. There are always depths. D says it’s sort of scary when you realize that EVERYBODY has a secret, inner life. I said not everybody. As the child of Robert and Jocelyn Bandry I can say that with CERTAINTY. And as far as Justin goes, I don’t know if I consider nicking my bra a DEPTH exactly, even if it is true that I wasn’t expecting it. It’s more like a Cesspool of Shallowness .
MONDAY 19 FEBRUARY (Half-term. Can I use the break? Do I need to breathe?)
Sigmund made Justin apologize for nicking my bra. If you count uttering one word (“Sorry”) from behind a camera an apology. Justin said it was Andrew’s idea. (Andrew is the fourth reason why I hate my brother.) According to Justin, they just wanted to see how it worked. What for? Are they planning to wear one? I’m going to make a list of every bra I own so I can check whether any go missing in the future.
The Mad Cow and Nan were all atwitter when I got home from Disha’s this afternoon. I reckoned there must’ve been another excruciatingly exciting incident in the supermarket, so I wasn’t really paying attention till I heard Nan say that she thought it might be a good idea if we set up a neighbourhood watch. Nan said she doesn’t know what the world’s coming to. In her day (like she can remember that far back!) people looked out for each other and knew how to take care of themselves. I thought Sigmund must’ve had another car stereo nicked (number five!), but it turned out that Mr Burl next door was robbed. Somebody took his scooter last Saturday night! My mobe was charging, so I raced to the kitchen phone to tell Disha that we’d actually witnessed a robbery in progress. Disha said hadn’t she said Mr Burl looked like he’d lost some weight? I said no. (I certainly don’t remember that.) She thought maybe the police would want to question us. The only person who wanted to question me was the Mad Cow. She’d been listening to my whole conversation, of course (I couldn’t have less privacy if I lived in a doorway). The MC was HORRIFIED that I actually
saw
someone going off with Mr Burl’s bike and didn’t say anything. I asked her what she wanted me to say. Anyway, how was I meant to know it wasn’t Mr Burl going for a moonlit ride? It was dark. She said she hoped I realized that at some point in time I was going to have to take up residence on Earth, and advised me against going into any career that required even an insignificant amount of thought.
TUESDAY 20 FEBRUARY
Another v interesting day!!! Went shopping for general maintenance supplies (shampoo, conditioner etc.), and who should I spy with my little eye but Mr and Mrs Hendley’s only daughter with the youngest son of Mr and Mrs Cabot! They were coming out of the record shop near the tube. They weren’t holding hands, but they were walking V CLOSE!!! I really am a creature of impulse, because I suddenly decided to follow them. They strolled along just looking in windows for a bit, and then they went into Woolies,
There must be more to Willow’s picking-wild-sage-when-the-moon-is-full routine than I thought. The swelling’s gone down and my nose has stopped aching.
Disha was suitably AGHAST when I told her what Geek Boy did. She says it just proves that you never really know anyone, not even the people who are closest to you. There are always depths. D says it’s sort of scary when you realize that EVERYBODY has a secret, inner life. I said not everybody. As the child of Robert and Jocelyn Bandry I can say that with CERTAINTY. And as far as Justin goes, I don’t know if I consider nicking my bra a DEPTH exactly, even if it is true that I wasn’t expecting it. It’s more like a Cesspool of Shallowness .
MONDAY 19 FEBRUARY (Half-term. Can I use the break? Do I need to breathe?)
Sigmund made Justin apologize for nicking my bra. If you count uttering one word (“Sorry”) from behind a camera an apology. Justin said it was Andrew’s idea. (Andrew is the fourth reason why I hate my brother.) According to Justin, they just wanted to see how it worked. What for? Are they planning to wear one? I’m going to make a list of every bra I own so I can check whether any go missing in the future.
The Mad Cow and Nan were all atwitter when I got home from Disha’s this afternoon. I reckoned there must’ve been another excruciatingly exciting incident in the supermarket, so I wasn’t really paying attention till I heard Nan say that she thought it might be a good idea if we set up a neighbourhood watch. Nan said she doesn’t know what the world’s coming to. In her day (like she can remember that far back!) people looked out for each other and knew how to take care of themselves. I thought Sigmund must’ve had another car stereo nicked (number five!), but it turned out that Mr Burl next door was robbed. Somebody took his scooter last Saturday night! My mobe was charging, so I raced to the kitchen phone to tell Disha that we’d actually witnessed a robbery in progress. Disha said hadn’t she said Mr Burl looked like he’d lost some weight? I said no. (I certainly don’t remember that.) She thought maybe the police would want to question us. The only person who wanted to question me was the Mad Cow. She’d been listening to my whole conversation, of course (I couldn’t have less privacy if I lived in a doorway). The MC was HORRIFIED that I actually
saw
someone going off with Mr Burl’s bike and didn’t say anything. I asked her what she wanted me to say. Anyway, how was I meant to know it wasn’t Mr Burl going for a moonlit ride? It was dark. She said she hoped I realized that at some point in time I was going to have to take up residence on Earth, and advised me against going into any career that required even an insignificant amount of thought.
TUESDAY 20 FEBRUARY
Another v interesting day!!! Went shopping for general maintenance supplies (shampoo, conditioner etc.), and who should I spy with my little eye but Mr and Mrs Hendley’s only daughter with the youngest son of Mr and Mrs Cabot! They were coming out of the record shop near the tube. They weren’t holding hands, but they were walking V CLOSE!!! I really am a creature of impulse, because I suddenly decided to follow them. They strolled along just looking in windows for a bit, and then they went into Woolies,
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