Perfection Is Just an Illusion (Swimming Upstream #1) by Rebecca Barber

trying to rush her. She loves you and I know she’ll tell you when she’s ready. Just give her time. I just know she will.” Renee smiled. James kept telling himself Renee was right. After all, she had known Anna longer than he had.
    “I hope so,” he said, deflated.
    Not long after Anna had gone to bed, her family headed back to her apartment. They would stay there tonight, visit Anna tomorrow, and if she didn’t need them they would head back home. Once they left, James slipped into the spare room to check that Anna didn’t need anything. She hadn’t moved since he had helped her into bed a few hours earlier. He had already planned his day tomorrow. He would go to training early and with any luck he would be home before Anna woke up or needed him. He would spend the day with her before heading back to training late in the afternoon. By then Michael would be home to look out for her if she needed him. As he was staring down at the bed he noticed how peaceful she looked. It was almost as though nothing was bothering her. She had no fears, no doubt, and no troubles…which James knew was not exactly the case. Reluctant to leave, he bent down, kissed her gently, and then disappeared upstairs and crawled into his own bed.
    The next morning James arrived home from training and just tossed his bag on the floor as he raced through the living room. His hair was still dripping wet and the chlorine clung to his skin. He hadn’t even bothered to shower or change. Every thought led him home to Anna. He raced through the house, desperate to see her. When he opened the bedroom door he was startled to see the bed was empty. Anna wasn’t there. He ran through to the kitchen but still there was no sign of her. James ran through the house calling out for her to no avail. James ran back to the spare bedroom. Then he spotted a small hand sticking out the side of the bed. Anna was lying on the floor next to the bed. James wanted to kick himself for not seeing her the instant he got home but now was not the time. He bent down and scooped her up. She had done more damage to her already battered body.

 
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
    Chapter 5
     
     
    Anna
     
    Once he’d settled Anna back in her bed on a nest of pillows, James went and made them some coffee. He returned moments later carrying a tray with her breakfast. Anna sat up and began to eat. “You have to be careful, a girl could get used to this.” Anna smirked, trying to lighten the mood.
    “Well, that’s the plan. I think it comes with the whole marriage arrangement. I get to take care of you and you don’t get to complain about it.” James laughed. Then, almost as if his body could no longer contain the words, James’s serious side emerged. He was now lying across the end of her bed, and all signs of light and laughter had vanished. “Princess, I know you probably don’t want to talk about it and I don’t want to push you, but I need to know, what happened in Canberra? Why did you want to leave? Please, Anna. Talk to me ’cause my imagination is running away from me,” he begged her.
    Taking a deep breath, Anna attempted to explain the best she could. “I don’t know. I don’t know how to explain it.”
    “Just try,” James encouraged.
    “I guess the truth is the more I thought about it, the more I realised that you deserved better. Better than all this. I have absolutely nothing to offer you. And I know that. I guess I always knew it but while we were in Canberra it was like the blinders came off and I saw just how big that gap was and how much I’m holding you back. And I was forced to accept that. I didn’t want to but it was hard not to. It was so obvious. Not just to me, but to everyone. I love you so much but you deserve to be happy. And you should have the best of everything. And that’s not me.” Anna didn’t cry. She didn’t smile. She just sat there straight-faced, staring blankly into the bottom of her coffee cup.
    After a silence that