smile as I realized how much
thought my mom must have put into preparing for this day. I quickly
dressed in a tee shirt and drawstring yoga pants and sat at my
vanity. All the changes in my body should have prepared me for what
I saw in the mirror, yet it had not. I turned my head this way and
that examining the planes and angles of the unfamiliar face staring
back at me. The only familiar thing about it was my wide grey-blue
eyes, though they were now framed by thick, dark lashes. The child
was gone; a woman looked back at me. I saw a lot of my mom in my
features. I had to admit, despite the insecurities that plagued me
my entire life, it wasn’t anything to be ashamed of.
I wasn’t at all tired. Of
course, I had just
spent a day or two sleeping, so what did I expect. After a long
moment of mental debate about what I should do, I pulled out my
laptop. Hard as it was to believe, I realized all these changes
happened in a single day. Checking my email didn’t occupy me for as
long as I’d hoped. After deleting the junk mail, I set my laptop
aside and tried to read my book, but it didn’t hold my attention
either. I gave up and went downstairs to watch television. Flicking
through channels trying to find something other than Law and Order
or an infomercial, I waited for my family to wake up. Something
told me there would be a lot to talk about tomorrow.
MY MOM WAS the first person awake. As
she stepped out of her room, still tying the fluffy red robe she’d
worn my entire life, she froze. Her face was a glowing mask of awe
and pride as she stared at me. She slowly walked closer as if
afraid I would suddenly vanish. I’d given up on television around
five in the morning and switched to staring blankly out the window,
my thoughts in such a tangle I couldn’t recall them the moment I
was summoned out of them.
I felt like I’d had a body transplant,
that this couldn’t possibly be me. My nails were still blue from
the polish Evelyn had used on them. The cut on my knee I got when I
fell out of the cherry tree when I was ten was still there. So was
the small, rounded line where Sariah smashed me in the head with a
crochet mallet. She claimed it was an accident, but I remain
unconvinced. So it was definitely the same body, it just seemed
like eight years had passed in a single night.
I stood, feeling odd in my own skin.
My mother rushed the rest of the way towards me and hugged me
tight. My lungs felt a little compressed from how tight she
squeezed, holding on for a very long time. When she pulled back, I
saw the tears on her cheeks. Placing her hand on my chin, she
smiled. “You’re beautiful, Amelia.” With her arm around my
shoulders, she led me into the kitchen. She began to make a big
breakfast, but she talked to me the whole time. “I’m so sorry I
didn’t prepare you more for that, Amelia.” Her head disappeared
into the pot cupboard, and her voice came out muffled. “I had
planned to spend the winter teaching you everything you needed to
know to be ready. Usually there are lots of signs before it comes,”
she said as she emerged, cast iron skillet in hand, “but I didn’t
notice anything out of the ordinary. Have you?”
I thought about it, biting an oddly
full lip. “Well,” I stopped, shocked by the sound of my own voice,
slightly throaty and husky. “I felt ill all week. I was running a
hundred and six degree temperature the other night.” I thought
harder. “No weird plant behavior. And all the things I ate were
normal. Well, normal for me, anyway,” I said, thinking of the
peanut butter and banana sandwiches.
“ Oh, Lia, I should have
phrased that better. The cravings aren’t just food, but for things
that go against your personality. Before my change, I craved hard
rock even though I’m a country girl at heart. If I’d had more time,
I would have warned you the signs were subtle.”
I thought about how I had been craving
attention on Halloween, and how Nate had pulled me out
thought my mom must have put into preparing for this day. I quickly
dressed in a tee shirt and drawstring yoga pants and sat at my
vanity. All the changes in my body should have prepared me for what
I saw in the mirror, yet it had not. I turned my head this way and
that examining the planes and angles of the unfamiliar face staring
back at me. The only familiar thing about it was my wide grey-blue
eyes, though they were now framed by thick, dark lashes. The child
was gone; a woman looked back at me. I saw a lot of my mom in my
features. I had to admit, despite the insecurities that plagued me
my entire life, it wasn’t anything to be ashamed of.
I wasn’t at all tired. Of
course, I had just
spent a day or two sleeping, so what did I expect. After a long
moment of mental debate about what I should do, I pulled out my
laptop. Hard as it was to believe, I realized all these changes
happened in a single day. Checking my email didn’t occupy me for as
long as I’d hoped. After deleting the junk mail, I set my laptop
aside and tried to read my book, but it didn’t hold my attention
either. I gave up and went downstairs to watch television. Flicking
through channels trying to find something other than Law and Order
or an infomercial, I waited for my family to wake up. Something
told me there would be a lot to talk about tomorrow.
MY MOM WAS the first person awake. As
she stepped out of her room, still tying the fluffy red robe she’d
worn my entire life, she froze. Her face was a glowing mask of awe
and pride as she stared at me. She slowly walked closer as if
afraid I would suddenly vanish. I’d given up on television around
five in the morning and switched to staring blankly out the window,
my thoughts in such a tangle I couldn’t recall them the moment I
was summoned out of them.
I felt like I’d had a body transplant,
that this couldn’t possibly be me. My nails were still blue from
the polish Evelyn had used on them. The cut on my knee I got when I
fell out of the cherry tree when I was ten was still there. So was
the small, rounded line where Sariah smashed me in the head with a
crochet mallet. She claimed it was an accident, but I remain
unconvinced. So it was definitely the same body, it just seemed
like eight years had passed in a single night.
I stood, feeling odd in my own skin.
My mother rushed the rest of the way towards me and hugged me
tight. My lungs felt a little compressed from how tight she
squeezed, holding on for a very long time. When she pulled back, I
saw the tears on her cheeks. Placing her hand on my chin, she
smiled. “You’re beautiful, Amelia.” With her arm around my
shoulders, she led me into the kitchen. She began to make a big
breakfast, but she talked to me the whole time. “I’m so sorry I
didn’t prepare you more for that, Amelia.” Her head disappeared
into the pot cupboard, and her voice came out muffled. “I had
planned to spend the winter teaching you everything you needed to
know to be ready. Usually there are lots of signs before it comes,”
she said as she emerged, cast iron skillet in hand, “but I didn’t
notice anything out of the ordinary. Have you?”
I thought about it, biting an oddly
full lip. “Well,” I stopped, shocked by the sound of my own voice,
slightly throaty and husky. “I felt ill all week. I was running a
hundred and six degree temperature the other night.” I thought
harder. “No weird plant behavior. And all the things I ate were
normal. Well, normal for me, anyway,” I said, thinking of the
peanut butter and banana sandwiches.
“ Oh, Lia, I should have
phrased that better. The cravings aren’t just food, but for things
that go against your personality. Before my change, I craved hard
rock even though I’m a country girl at heart. If I’d had more time,
I would have warned you the signs were subtle.”
I thought about how I had been craving
attention on Halloween, and how Nate had pulled me out
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