My Life as a Doormat (in Three Acts) by Rene Gutteridge

didn’t look pleased to be a part of her trick.
    Marilyn looked at Robert again. “Okay, thanks, Robert. You can sit down.”
    But Robert didn’t sit down. Instead, he drew air through his nostrils at such speed they sucked shut and made the most terrifying squeaky noise. Everyone gasped, probably because we had geared ourselves up for Robert shouting at the top of his lungs, but that short squeaky noise was just as surprising.
    His head rotated slowly toward Glenda, but his eyeballs kept turning, eying me, Carol, and the pastor. None of us said a word. I noticed, however, that I was very, very damp.
    He then looked back at Glenda. “I am going to deal with you in a minute,” Robert said, “but Marilyn, I have to say, I don’t like being the butt of anybody’s joke. Ever. ” The two-syllable word stretched into four. I looked at Marilyn. She seemed slightly worried, but kept a good poker face.
    â€œI’m sorry, Robert. But again, conflict catches us by surprise. And among other things, we’re each going to learn to be the butt of a joke, with class and style.”
    I watched Robert’s hands ball up, and then he looked at Glenda. “Lady, if I were you, I’d make sure you kept a good distance from me if you want to make it out of this class with your handbag intact.”
    Glenda was still pale, but she said, “Are you threatening me?”
    Robert started to march over to Glenda, but Cinco hopped up and took Robert’s arm. I expected Cinco to be thrown back into his chair with one swift move, but instead Robert stopped.
    â€œDude, let’s just sit down,” Cinco said. “It’s not worth taking this class over again, is it?” There was humor in Cinco’s voice, and Robert turned and looked at him, then let go of a smile.
    Then he smiled at Marilyn. Then at the rest of us. I felt myself smiling, but I didn’t know why, because Robert’s swing to the lighter side was making me equally as nervous. Now he was chuckling and all I could think was, We’re all going to die.
    â€œIf you’re paying attention, this is a good example of how layered conflict can be. It’s not just a problem that gets solved. Conflict is often complicated because of people’s emotions.” Marilyn suddenly stood, clipboard in hand, and patted Robert on the arm. “Thanks, Robert. You can sit down.”
    Robert sat down.
    â€œRobert was in on this from the beginning,” Marilyn announced with a smile. Cinco was still standing in the middle of our circle, and Marilyn said to him, “Cinco, you did a great job diffusing the situation.”
    â€œRobert wasn’t really mad?” Glenda asked.
    â€œNo. He was with me from the beginning, even on the court case. I wanted to do this to show you all how to deal with conflict.” She looked at each of us as Cinco took his seat. “How did you deal with what just happened? From the start when I told Robert about the court problem, to when I told Robert I was just using him as an example, how did you feel? What was your first reaction? What about when Robert got angry? How did you feel then?”
    Marilyn looked at each of us, and I looked down. I tried to sort through it all, wanting to be a good student of the class. After getting over the initial shock that this was all a setup, twice, I tried to remember what I was feeling.
    Nothing. I’d gone into shock.
    Marilyn let silence go by as she took her seat. She let us all dwell on our wretched shortcomings. Then she spoke with a great deal of authority.
    â€œCinco, I was impressed with your ability and courage to stand up and stop Robert when you felt he was going to attack Glenda. That’s a good attribute, but if not reined in, it can be a hindrance too. Some conflicts can’t be quickly ‘fixed’ and take time and patience. Just remember that. Glenda, it’s obvious to me that you take conflict by the