Motherlove by Thorne Moore

Kelly wasn’t paying for the test in order to reject or accept Roz. Nothing was going to alter their relationship. It was just the thought of that other girl out there. She had to know.
    When Kelly had first jumped in with an offer of one of her kidneys, she had experienced a queer flutter of pleasure, the satisfaction of sainthood. She had mocked herself, but what was wrong with feeling good about self-sacrifice? And as she couldn’t make that sacrifice, what if there was someone else out there who could? Would they? She would, she was confident of that. If a complete stranger approached her out of the blue and told Kelly that one of her kidneys could save an unknown woman, she was certain she wouldn’t hesitate. That glow of virtue. Kelly had a strong sense of morality. Her own, based on her own values. A morality that would have urged her to save someone else if she could, but that didn’t stop her tricking her mother over the maternity test.
    The result had come on the day they’d heard from Roger and Mandy, inviting Roz to stay with them for a while to recuperate.
    Roz was not Kelly’s mother.
    Kelly had read the report, put it aside and concentrated on persuading her mother to accept the Padstows’ invitation, making the arrangements, kicking the Astra into some sort of life, persuading Joe to move in for a few days to take care of the animals. Those were the things that mattered. The maternity test didn’t.
    But now Roz was here, it was time to think about the test. Somewhere out there was the child that Roz had carried for nine months, the girl whose blood and tissue might match. Kelly had arranged the test in order to know. What to do with the knowledge? She would have a week or two to think about it, while Roz was in Roger and Mandy’s care, but she had no idea what steps to take. Somewhere in her imagination lurked a nebulous image of serendipity, an accidental meeting of two young women who recognised each other by magical instinct. But it was never going to happen that way. Any meeting would have to be engineered and Kelly had no idea how to begin.
    This house seemed alien in the night, with its trappings of affluent chic. She needed to be back at Carregwen, mulling over the options with the chickens, discussing it with Eleanor and Rigby the goats.
    Then in the morning everything changed.
    Before breakfast, she carried her kitbag out to the car and found it gone. She returned to the house. ‘Mandy, where’s the Astra?’
    Mandy, busy with dried fruit, hurried to reassure her. ‘It’s all right. Rog will explain. Roger!’
    He came through from the conservatory, a wet towel round his shoulders.
    â€˜Explain about Kelly’s car,’ ordered Mandy.
    He smiled and held up placatory hands. ‘It’s at Darnley’s garage, Kelly. I arranged for them to come and take it. Urgent repairs.’
    â€˜But I can’t afford—’
    â€˜Don’t worry about that. I’m dealing with it. Be honest, Kelly, it’s not safe, is it? How you got here without killing yourself, God knows. I didn’t want to see you driving off in it. The garage is going sort out the major problems. Can’t guarantee they’ll fix every rattle, but—’
    â€˜How long are they going to be? I need it. It’s all right really. I know how to keep it going.’
    â€˜I’m not letting you loose in it, the way it is. Don’t worry, we’re not holding you prisoner. The garage can work on it while you’re gone, and it will be ready when you come back to pick your mother up. And in the meantime, you can take Mandy’s Corsa.’
    â€˜No.’
    â€˜Yes,’ insisted Roger, with Mandy nodding enthusiastic approval.
    She would have refused if it hadn’t been too late. But the Astra was gone, probably already disembowelled over some pit and she couldn’t wait forever. Joe couldn’t be left in charge of Carregwen