Tino.”
“Let’s argue about it in the truck. Come on. I brought food. I know you’re starving and so am I after putting in a full day of work at the restaurant. You’ll be pleased to know I got the inventory done for my father.”
“I’m sure that made him happy.”
“We’ll see.” He helped her into the cab, then walked around and got behind the wheel. “I thought we’d eat at the park by our old school before I take you home. It’s on the way.”
As they drove off she stared out the passenger window not saying anything. “Was it a bad day, piccola ?”
“I’d rather not talk about it.”
“Then we won’t.”
Before long they wound around to a grassy section of the park. He slowed to a stop beneath some shade trees. “I think you’re too tired to get out, so we’ll eat right here.” He handed her a sandwich and drink from the bag sitting between them.
Her hunger won out and she ate. After they’d both finished their food he turned to her. “I didn’t get to say all I needed to say to you last night.”
“You said enough and I told you no.”
“Five more minutes is all I ask. If your answer is still no, I won’t bring it up again.”
She lowered her head. “What is it?’
“I want to tell you the secret I couldn’t tell Father Orsini.”
“Tino—”
“It’s about the details of my mother’s death.”
Here came his tentacle hooks, grabbing hold of Clara so she was a captive audience, but she kept telling herself she was going to wake up at any second and find herself at home in bed, or at the clinic.
“Did I ever tell you Mamma was a diabetic?”
“No.” She hadn’t heard that.
“She suffered from dizzy spells, a lot, and was battling a severe one the day she slipped on one of my toys and fell down the stairs. We were alone in the house. I was only five at the time and tried to get her to breathe again, but she wouldn’t wake up.”
Stop talking, Tino.
“I can still remember my terror because I didn’t know what to do. I didn’t know how to use the phone and there weren’t any neighbors close by. A helplessness went through me the likes of which I’d never known. I loved her so much and remember lying down next to her, sobbing. Cristiano was supposed to be home. I prayed for him to come.”
You’re breaking my heart.
“The second I heard him come in the house, I ran screaming to him and told him what had happened. He took one look at Mamma and called for the ambulance, but when it came, it was too late. The look he gave me made me want to shrivel up and die.”
A moan escaped Clara’s throat.
“Her death has plagued me all my life. I always felt the family blamed me, especially since I wasn’t Papa’s real son.”
Her head flew back. “But you were his son in all the other ways that counted.”
He shook his head. She still couldn’t reach him on that point.
“From then on I stayed away from the house as much aspossible. You were always kind to me. You were so good and pure and you accepted me for the way I was. I found myself clinging to you.”
“Oh, Tino—” Clara had had no idea of the depth of pain he’d suffered.
“I figured that one day when I was older, I would go away so no one would have to be reminded of what a terrible person I was.”
“But you didn’t do anything wrong!” she cried, shaking her head in despair.
“When I grew to adulthood, I gained an intellectual understanding of what had happened, but emotionally…? To make matters worse, my long absences from home did a lot of damage to the rest of the family. My aunt Lisa took great satisfaction in letting me know I’d let everyone down.”
She held her head in her hands. “All this was going on inside you and you never said a word.”
“I couldn’t. I felt too frozen inside. Isabella kept begging me to come back and help with Papa, but I was too torn apart by my fears to do what she asked. I know Cristiano hasn’t come back because deep down he still
“Let’s argue about it in the truck. Come on. I brought food. I know you’re starving and so am I after putting in a full day of work at the restaurant. You’ll be pleased to know I got the inventory done for my father.”
“I’m sure that made him happy.”
“We’ll see.” He helped her into the cab, then walked around and got behind the wheel. “I thought we’d eat at the park by our old school before I take you home. It’s on the way.”
As they drove off she stared out the passenger window not saying anything. “Was it a bad day, piccola ?”
“I’d rather not talk about it.”
“Then we won’t.”
Before long they wound around to a grassy section of the park. He slowed to a stop beneath some shade trees. “I think you’re too tired to get out, so we’ll eat right here.” He handed her a sandwich and drink from the bag sitting between them.
Her hunger won out and she ate. After they’d both finished their food he turned to her. “I didn’t get to say all I needed to say to you last night.”
“You said enough and I told you no.”
“Five more minutes is all I ask. If your answer is still no, I won’t bring it up again.”
She lowered her head. “What is it?’
“I want to tell you the secret I couldn’t tell Father Orsini.”
“Tino—”
“It’s about the details of my mother’s death.”
Here came his tentacle hooks, grabbing hold of Clara so she was a captive audience, but she kept telling herself she was going to wake up at any second and find herself at home in bed, or at the clinic.
“Did I ever tell you Mamma was a diabetic?”
“No.” She hadn’t heard that.
“She suffered from dizzy spells, a lot, and was battling a severe one the day she slipped on one of my toys and fell down the stairs. We were alone in the house. I was only five at the time and tried to get her to breathe again, but she wouldn’t wake up.”
Stop talking, Tino.
“I can still remember my terror because I didn’t know what to do. I didn’t know how to use the phone and there weren’t any neighbors close by. A helplessness went through me the likes of which I’d never known. I loved her so much and remember lying down next to her, sobbing. Cristiano was supposed to be home. I prayed for him to come.”
You’re breaking my heart.
“The second I heard him come in the house, I ran screaming to him and told him what had happened. He took one look at Mamma and called for the ambulance, but when it came, it was too late. The look he gave me made me want to shrivel up and die.”
A moan escaped Clara’s throat.
“Her death has plagued me all my life. I always felt the family blamed me, especially since I wasn’t Papa’s real son.”
Her head flew back. “But you were his son in all the other ways that counted.”
He shook his head. She still couldn’t reach him on that point.
“From then on I stayed away from the house as much aspossible. You were always kind to me. You were so good and pure and you accepted me for the way I was. I found myself clinging to you.”
“Oh, Tino—” Clara had had no idea of the depth of pain he’d suffered.
“I figured that one day when I was older, I would go away so no one would have to be reminded of what a terrible person I was.”
“But you didn’t do anything wrong!” she cried, shaking her head in despair.
“When I grew to adulthood, I gained an intellectual understanding of what had happened, but emotionally…? To make matters worse, my long absences from home did a lot of damage to the rest of the family. My aunt Lisa took great satisfaction in letting me know I’d let everyone down.”
She held her head in her hands. “All this was going on inside you and you never said a word.”
“I couldn’t. I felt too frozen inside. Isabella kept begging me to come back and help with Papa, but I was too torn apart by my fears to do what she asked. I know Cristiano hasn’t come back because deep down he still
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